A Curse of Shadows - Page 88

My hand lifts, but I stop myself. Touching him would put me at risk. I know this and I won’t disrespect Asher’s wishes or break my promise.

Thankfully, his coughing ceases, but he’s wheezing heavily now. “You know, I used to think the magic within this room was a great tool. I never suspected I would be a victim of it.” He struggles to lift his head again, then gives up, continuing to speak without looking at me. “I’m running out of time, Is. My wolf can’t heal me in here and even if he could, I know Asher’s just waiting for his chance to end me. I don’t blame him, but I need you to know the truth.”

Gods, I don’t know if I can handle that right now.

“I was in love with you,” he admits. “You were the only light in my life, the only thing that kept me from running away. I knew it was wrong. I knew you belonged with Asher, but I couldn’t let you go, even when I should have.”

Briefly, his head comes up and he stares right into my soul. “I never could have hurt you. If I were capable of that, I would have tried to steal you from Asher before I would have ever thought to kill you.”

“What’s happening?” Asher’s voice sounds in my mind.

“I’m fine. Give me a minute.”

His growl moves through me. “Then why do you feel so sad?”

I can’t answer him. Hearing Noen out has to come first. I need to feel the truth, to understand what I never did before.

“You need to find Declan before it’s too late,” he pleads. “I don’t expect you to believe me, but if you find him and can figure out what that orb is for, then I know you’ll find the answers you need. If I could help you any more, I would.” His shoulders tremble as he adds, “I’m not ready to die, Is.”

This is so much worse than I could have imagined.

My wolf’s spirit settles over me and I’ve never wished to be able to speak with her more than I do now. Noen being guilty makes sense. He had reason to kill me before and he could have given Declan that orb, using it to send him after me.

So many scenarios and I don’t know how to find the facts. Yet the thought of believing Noen, of keeping him alive long enough to find Declan, that brings me peace, makes me feel better about this whole situation.

“We can’t let you out of this room,” I tell him, just so he doesn’t misunderstand what I’m about to say.

“I don’t want you to,” he replies. “I want there to be no doubt that when something else happens, you know I had nothing to do with this.”

“When something else happens? What do you mean?” And just like that, I’m back to being uncertain of what is right and wrong.

“Declan tried to kill you last night,” he reminds me. “Don’t tell me you think he won’t try again or that someone else won’t? Someone doesn’t want you here, someone who has probably hated you this whole time without you ever knowing. Find that person, and soon, because I don’t even think Declan did this. At least not on his own.”

Please let him be wrong about that. If there is more than one person out there who wants me dead, I just might try to convince Asher to run away with me. Okay, that’s a lie. I’d never walk away from our home and our people, but the idea does have an appeal to it, I can’t deny that.

“There’s something we’re missing,” Noen continues, regardless of my continued silence. “Asher knew I was in love with you and that made me an easy suspect. But I’m not the boy you once knew. There’s a reason I’ve stayed away from you since you returned and it’s not because I’m guilty. I know better now and as much as I missed my best friend, I found a new one in Asher, and I never wanted to hurt him by getting close to you again. Even if that meant I lost both of you.”

He has another coughing fit, but this time, blood splatters everywhere from his mouth, barely missing my shoes. He’s bleeding internally. It wasn’t a lie when he said he was running out of time.

“You need to come in here and heal him,” I tell Asher. “He’s dying.”

“Good fucking riddance,” my mate replies harshly.

“We don’t have the whole truth,” I say, knowing this is hard for Asher to hear because Noen is right. It was so easy for us to believe he could have betrayed us, but I haven’t lived an easy life in five centuries. No sense in doing so now. “If you let him die before we find Declan, I don’t know if I’ll ever have the closure I need and I don’t think you will, either.”

Asher doesn’t reply right away and I can’t sit here, doing nothing. I go to Noen, lift his head to help clear his airway and rip a piece of his shirt to wipe his mouth with.

“Hang in there,” I whisper. “If you’re right—though I’m not saying I believe you—I will figure this out.”

He groans and starts to say something but then goes completely limp in the chair again.

“Don’t die on me yet, Noen,” I tell him sternly, then I turn for the door. There’s nothing left to learn in this room. Any other answers we need are out there somewhere.

I just hope Asher trusts me enough to help me find them.

There’s no handle on the interior side of the door. I raise my hand to knock, but it starts to open before I can.

Asher enters and I’m hit with a wave of fury.