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Before the door closes, Rayez turns, her sunglasses in her hand. “Hey.” She holds the door open with her hand, curled fingers white with the force of how hard she’s holding the door. “Saylor, right?” I dip a nod, confused. “If there’s something wrong…” She glances at Jed over my shoulder, her eyes narrowed in a glare. “If there’s anything going on here, you can tell me.” She sidles closer, and my heart does a flip while my stomach flutters. “I can help you.”

She can help me.My brain latches onto that statement and my lips fall open, parting like something will come out when there’s nothing there at all. Not even a whisper. I just stare at her, nonplussed, and wait for my brain to catch up.

“I can get you out of here, okay?” For the first time, her voice is gentle when she says it, and while I can feel Jed behind me, waiting, he doesn’t do or say anything. He doesn’t try to get between us, and I don’t feel his hands on any part of me, in reassurance or in warning.

He’s waiting for me to decide.

“I’m fine.” My eyes meet the officer’s, and my chin tilts upward with confidence. I say it again, repeating the words to her flatly. “I’m fine.”

The worst part is that she believes me. The suspicion fades from her gaze and she slips her sunglasses back on, nodding curtly while Brown waddles back to their car. “If you think of anything you’ve seen, please let me know.” She hands her card to Jed, who has come to stand at my side sometime in the past few seconds. “Have a nice day, both of you.”

Then she turns, gets in the car, and they drive away without stopping. Without seeing the slaughter shed.

Without taking me with them.

But all I can do is stand there while Jed pockets the paper, my hand tight on the door while the rest of my body vibrates with tension.

“Saylor…” There’s relief in Jed’s voice as he looks at me, and he reaches one hand out for me, stopping when I whirl on him.

“Stop. Please,” I whisper, holding my hands up in front of me like a shield. I canfeelthe tears burning at my eyes, and I see my upraised hands shake. “Please, Jed. I just…” Cutting myself off, I close my eyes hard, shaking my head. “I don’t know what I did. I don’t knowwhy…” He doesn’t interrupt me. He doesn’t say anything as my stomach threatens to reject the water I’d had.

“I need to go. I need to—” I step out of the cabin, onto the gravel beyond as my breathing comes in sharp, jagged pants. “Just for a little while. Let methink.” He isn’t arguing with me. Hell, he isn’t saying anything.

But his gaze says it all. It expresses the worry, the concern, and the thing I’m not sure he wants me to see.

I can tell, in his eyes, that he doesn’t justlikeme, though the strong emotions there should be impossible for someone who’s only known me for a few days.

“I’ll be here,” he promises, his own voice low. “I’ll be here, for whatever you need. Saylor, I’m?—”

But I step away because I can’t listen to him say it, even though I don’t know whatitis. I want to kiss him; I want to slap him, and I want to run away. Finally, my brain settles on one option just as I pivot on my heel.My tiredness and sore muscles are forgotten as once again I do the thing I’m starting to think is my true calling after all these years.

I run from him.

Chapter

Fifteen

Ihate how easy it is to lose myself in my wandering thoughts. I hate how good I am at losing hours and hours of my day when I need more than anything to stay in the present so I can figure out what in the world I’m going to do.

But more than anything, I hate how lost I am right now. Physically and mentally, I have no idea where I am or what I’m doing. Mostly it’s the physical part of being lost that’s making me jumpy right now, as the sun has already set and the air is chillier than I’d thought possible for April in Ohio.

Obviously I should’ve realized that with my luck, I’d be out here when temperatures plummet without the jacket Jed had offered me.

“Fuck,” I sigh, burying my face in my hands. Since I don’t have my phone, I have no light, and my heart pounds in my chest every time I hear something in the woods around me. I have no idea where in the world I am, or how badly I’ve gotten myself turned around. I can’t see the cabin, or a path, or anything else through the trees.

And I’m too afraid to scream or call out for Jed. I worry there’s something else in the woods, like a bear just waiting to eat me, as dumb as that might sound.

“You have to get up, Saylor,” I mutter, my fingers clenching into my borrowed sweatpants. At least I’m not out here in just shorts and a t-shirt, but his shirt is too thin to really provide even half the warmth the sweatpants do. “You have to find your way back. Or somewhere, at least.” Somewhere that isn’t the middle of the woods, in the dark, where animals with long, sharp teeth roam around.

I force myself to get to my feet, my legs half-asleep from the cold and how long I’ve been sitting. I’ve really fucked up this time, but I do a quick spin on the off chance that since now it’s fully dark, I’ll be able to see something other than…well, nothing.

Nothing except the dark, and the few trees closest to me.

My heart hammers in my chest, but I take a few deep breaths to try to make things better. Or at least to make my brain stop running through all the worst-case scenarios that could happen while I’m out here.

“You won’t freeze to death,” I murmur, setting off in a random direction that feels somewhat okay. It’s better than sitting at least. While I walk, I rub my arms, trying to warm up. “You willnotfreeze to death. You may be miserable. You may catch the fuckingconsumptionout here from the cold. But you will not freeze to death, Saylor.” The sound of my voice does a good bit to calm me down, and my strides lengthen as I keep going.

“You also won’t get eaten,” I add, when I hear a far off howl. “Animals are more afraid of you than you are of them. As impossible as that seems right now.” Truly, I’m not sure how anything could be more frightening than I am at this moment, but I’m willing to hear an explanation or see evidence of that.“Even if there are a few bears out here, what are the chances of you running into them? Coyotes don’t eat people, right?” I’m pretty sure they don’t.