Chapter 8: Bullshit Philosophy

Looking down at Shen Qingxue’s blushing, tear-streaked face resting against my chest, I felt a wave of profound satisfaction wash over me. Who didn’t like having a beauty in their arms?

I certainly liked it a lot.

Honestly, I hadn’t expected things to go this smoothly. I had merely planned to lay down my honest intentions, but to actually lock down a future sovereign jade beauty as my wife within hours of picking her off the dirt? Heaven was practically handing me everything on a silver platter.

’I guess it really is a compensation for all those years of suffering. Thanks for everything, whoever sent me this system.’

Now that she was officially mine, I resolved to pamper her to the high heavens. She was my woman now, and it was her natural right to enjoy the finest clothes, the richest spiritual dishes, and the most divine cultivation techniques under the sun. Not to mention, every heavenly treasure I shoved into her hands would bounce straight back to me tenfold.

Our future was looking brighter than a burst of heavenly tribulation lightning.

’Wait! I shouldn’t say that. If Heavens got offended and took back my system? No, I can’t let that happen. Sorry, big bro. You’re the best.’

"Master..." Qingxue murmured softly, her fingers gently curling into the fabric of my white robe.

"Call me husband when we’re alone," I said with a smile, pinching her cheek lightly, feeling the smooth warmth of her newly purified skin. "Save ’Master’ for the outsiders, so those old fossils on the Council don’t choke on their beards."

Her blush deepened to the tips of her delicate ears, but she gave a timid, obedient nod.

Just as I was about to guide her inside to study her new scripture, the peaceful air above Lonely Cloud Peak shattered like thin glass.

BOOM!

A terrifying, swirling vortex of frosty azure qi tore through the sea of clouds above, descending upon my courtyard with the raw ferocity of a rampaging hurricane. Potted spirit orchids rattled, the bamboo grove bent nearly in half, and the heavy stone tiles trembled beneath an unmistakable, suffocating Nascent Soul spiritual pressure.

"Lu Chen! You thick-skinned brat, explain yourself this instant!"

The gale parted, and Su Wan’er materialized out of thin air, touching down in the center of the courtyard like a descended frost goddess. Her embroidered azure-and-silver robes fluttered violently around her curvaceous frame, and her majestic, jade-carved face was dark with thunderous fury.

She had clearly flown straight from the Grand Cloud Plaza to chew me out.

"Senior Sister, must you always land like a meteor?" I sighed, casually stepping in front of Qingxue to shield her from the residual wind. "You’re going to crack my nice paving stones."

"Shut your mouth!" Wan’er snapped, marching toward me with fiery eyes, raising a slender, porcelain finger to jab at my chest. "Do you have any idea what you did back there?! The entire Council is in an uproar! Zhao Cang was spitting blood in rage, and Elder Han—"

Suddenly, her voice died completely in her throat.

Her hand froze mid-air, inches from my chest. Her almond eyes went wide as saucers, her pupils constricting until they were practically pinpricks. The ferocious, scolding momentum that had carried her across the mountain ranges collapsed in a single instant.

She completely forgot about the girl standing behind me. She took half a step closer, leaning her face right into mine, her delicate nostrils flaring as her divine sense swept aggressively across every inch of my body.

"You..." Wan’er breathed, her voice suddenly trembling with sheer disbelief. "What... what happened to you?!"

"What happened to what? Did my hair get messy from your landing?" I asked innocently, checking my sleeves.

"Do not play dumb with me, Lu Chen!" Wan’er hissed, grabbing my wrist with a grip tight enough to crush mortal iron. Her spiritual perception probed into my meridians, and her jaw dropped even further. "Your Golden Core... it’s the size of an apricot! Dense, crystalline, perfectly rounded... Late-Stage Core Formation?! How in the name of the Heavenly Ancestor are you at Late-Stage Core Formation?"

She shook my arm in a daze, looking at me as if I had sprouted three heads and turned into a celestial demon.

"We were just talking at my pavilion an hour and a half ago!" she gasped, her chest heaving heavily under her tight robes. "You were Early Core Formation! You’ve been stuck at Early Core Formation for five agonizing years! You can’t just jump two entire realms while brewing a pot of tea!"

I couldn’t help but chuckle at her completely shattered worldview. Gently pulling my wrist from her trembling grip, I gave her a mysterious, profound smile.

"Senior Sister, you worry too much," I replied smoothly, lying through my teeth with supreme confidence. "Who said I broke through just now? The truth is, I broke through my bottleneck a while back. I was simply using a breath-concealing technique to hide my cultivation base so those old busybodies on the Council wouldn’t bother me. But since I’m back on my own peak, in the privacy of my home, I naturally let my guard down."

Wan’er stood frozen, blinking repeatedly as she tried to force her logical mind to accept my absurd explanation.

Eventually, the tension drained from her shoulders, replaced by a long, heavy sigh of utter exhaustion. She rubbed her temples with both hands, turned around, and slumped down onto the nearby stone bench with an unladylike groan.

"A breath-concealing technique... of course," she muttered to herself, staring blankly at the stone table. "You lazy, secretive little scoundrel. You almost gave me a heart demon."

She looked back up at me, her sharp phoenix eyes narrowing with renewed annoyance. "Why were you even hiding it? Do you have any idea how much grief you could have spared me? You’re only thirty-eight years old, Lu Chen! Reaching Late-Stage Core Formation before forty isn’t just decent, it puts you among the upper echelon of the sect’s inner masters! While it might not match the monsters from the Central Continent, it is more than enough to silence the entire Council."