Chapter 6124 - 5137: A Journey of Surprises (12)

"Did you win then?" Little Superman asked.

"I can’t say I’ve won." Greed sighed somewhat wistfully, "As long as there is someone, there will be someone who wants to harm others, heresy will always exist. Even if one or two are dealt with, it’s impossible to end their existence."

Little Superman nodded empathetically, then said, "You are a good Doctor, I will help you in the future. If they dare to come, I will uproot them completely."

Since they have now transformed into light clusters and are in the third-person view, Little Superman couldn’t see the expressions of the agent and Deathstroke. If he could see them, he would understand that Greed’s evasive sigh had already revealed the heresy organizations’ fate—not uprooted entirely, but perhaps functionally extinct.

"So what exactly is going on?" The agent didn’t quite understand, "Why is Nina crying? And what’s the connection to the trauma aggregation law?"

"That Black girl most likely shares the same issue with her, or her mental state isn’t good. That’s how they become friends."

"That can’t be right." Deathstroke was a bit puzzled, "They seem rather cheerful, weren’t they just talking about rock bands or something? It doesn’t look like they have mental issues."

"The image of people with mental illness and madmen in popular stereotypes is problematic," Greed said, "People always see mental patients as beasts, thinking they’re completely different from the human race, and should always be crazy, even barbaric, possibly attacking others at any time."

"But in reality, even at the onset of severe schizophrenia, they do not always have aggressiveness. Even during an episode, they can intake some information and have reactions like normal people, not entirely inaccessible."

"Patients with depression or similar issues aren’t like the stereotype of madmen. Most of the time, they seem very normal, and even when they’re at their worst, unable to move at all, their minds are clear and capable of communication."

"In fact, because of this, they feel pain. Just like Nina and her friend, when not in an episode, they can happily talk about rock music, want to go to a band concert, possibly with tickets and dates already set."

"But once they have an episode, they become very fearful of going out, even lacking the energy to get out of bed. Despite knowing it might mean missing out, wasting money, wasting opportunities, tossing potentially the happiest times of their lives into the abyss, they just can’t get up, can’t do it, and that’s what causes them pain."

"If they were completely unaware, unable to perceive the world, they would be happy in some sense. Without expectations, there’s no disappointment; it’s always the ones who are almost mad that suffer the most."

Little Superman showed a look of understanding: "So Nina’s friend had an episode? And because they couldn’t go to the concert together, she’s very sad?"

Greed shook his head again: "If they’re just sick, then Wind Chime wouldn’t be undeliverable. As it’s said, even lying in bed unable to move, their mind is still clear. There’s no reason not to accept a friend’s gift."

"Then why exactly..."

"Nina’s friend might already be dead." Greed sighed, "It’s the man’s words that were the last straw that broke the camel’s back. Depression’s suicidal tendencies are influenced by pathologic factors, but psychological triggers can greatly worsen the condition, leading to a tragedy due to imbalance maintained by medication."

Little Superman took a light breath: "What did that man say?"

His social experience was relatively limited, so it was hard for him to imagine. But Deathstroke obviously could foresee, he shook his head and said, "This man completely aimed to destroy her, her good friend committing suicide over this, she must feel very guilty."

Greed nodded and said, "Strong self-loathing will worsen her gender identity disorder, making her feel everything about herself is wrong."

"Would this also make her suicidal?" Little Superman asked.

"Yes, but that’s not the scariest part." Greed sighed deeply, "The scariest thing is, at this moment, someone gave her affirmation, whether genuinely or deceitfully, at least firmly recognized her at that time."

"Isn’t that a good thing?" Little Superman asked.

"Whether it’s a good thing depends on whether that person is a good person," Greed seemed to have already anticipated the plot’s progression, "Or, whether this person can always be a good person."

"But if they’re not a good person, they wouldn’t give such affirmation to others, right?"

"I said, people with mental trauma are like wounded fish. And in the vast ocean, there are not only ordinary fish but also predators like sharks that are drawn by the smell of blood."

The others had a vague sense of foreboding, Deathstroke said, "What was the name of the person Nina just called? Andrew? Was he asking Nina for money?"

"Possibly," the agent said, "and it sounded like he was cursing."

"I don’t understand," Little Superman said, "Even if Andrew initially gave Nina confidence and Nina reciprocated in some way, it’s not necessary to comply without question, right? Especially when she’s not financially stable, why give him money?"

"This situation arises when your self-identity is built on external things," Greed expressed some helplessness, "Many people unknowingly fall into this trap, believing that seeking validation externally is normal and a necessary condition for surviving in this society."

"But in reality, it’s completely different. The premise for obtaining genuine recognition from others is that you don’t need to seek their recognition."

"It’s like a tongue twister," Little Superman commented, "I completely don’t understand."

"Once you desperately want recognition from someone, you inevitably have to please them. But pleasing someone not only requires effort, you also have to change yourself to suit their preferences. In this way, even if you gain their recognition, it’s not the real you they are recognizing, but the you who changed to accommodate their preferences."

"No one can suppress their true nature indefinitely; if all the recognition you receive is based on a fabricated false personality, then when the day comes when you can no longer suppress your true nature, this recognition will collapse with nothing left behind."

"As long as you insist on being yourself, not trying to please anyone, and not changing for anyone, you can at least guarantee that all the people who recognize you are recognizing the real you. Even if you’re not hero-respecting-hero, but rather in cahoots with villains, at least you can relax and be yourself."

"Sounds not so great, won’t that make you too self-centered?" Deathstroke asked.

"I still stand by what I said: I’m not responsible for judging right or wrong; I’m just telling you how to live a little more easily," Greed said, "Even if your true self is hated by the vast majority, if you persist in not changing, remaining self-centered until death, wouldn’t anyone have to say ’what a life’ at your tombstone?"

"That seems quite difficult to achieve," Little Superman thought for a moment and said, "If you’re truly hated by the majority, then the pressure from people around you would prevent you from easily being yourself; you’d have to disguise yourself to some extent."

"That’s the give and take," Greed smiled and said, "Insisting on self has its pressures, overly compromising leads to depletion; finding balance is most important, but not everyone has that skill. That’s the significance of psychiatrists: although they can’t bring you to the golden balance point, they can at least help you get somewhat closer."

While they were talking, the memory playback finished, and the screen returned to color. Nina’s face showed a sad expression, quickly replaced by deeper anxiety, then she made a decision every drunkard makes: worry about tomorrow’s worries tomorrow, today, let’s just drink.

Nina left the room for a little while and returned with half a bottle of vodka from somewhere. She poured the alcohol into a glass, tossed a large handful of pills into her mouth, and unbelievably swallowed them down with vodka. This operation stunned everyone.

It’s true not all medications conflict with alcohol, but still, isn’t vodka a bit much for taking pills? Even if it were replaced with a lower-proof beer?

But clearly, Nina didn’t think too much about it, or perhaps she thought nothing at all. After taking the pills, she started chugging the vodka, drinking half a bottle, then laying down on the bed and falling asleep.

"Though it’s wrong to numb oneself with alcohol, her living condition is indeed worrying," Deathstroke sighed. Since becoming younger, he’d gained a deeper understanding of the living conditions of modern youth, "For a long time, I believed those who drank, did drugs, and didn’t pursue proper jobs were asking for it; if one day they got hit by a stray bullet on the street and died unexpectedly, they deserved it."

"But later, after I became young again, I realized how many traps and temptations young people face. Even if you do nothing and just walk down the street, mobs will try to sell you drugs, and if you don’t buy, they might ridicule you, calling you a nerd or a wimp. If you want some entertainment, even in the most legitimate bars, there are equal amounts of people selling contraband and soliciting clients."

"If you start wandering the chaotic neighborhoods, you’re even more likely to be fooled, because many will pose as friendly, try to buddy up, act like they’re on your side, inviting you to join them. First, they let you taste some benefits, then they start exploiting you; countless people have been dragged into Hell this way."

"Although things weren’t so chaotic when I was young, upon reflection, I noticed the early signs. But I’ve never been an ordinary person; my innate conditions were better than most, combined with good luck, which kept me out of trouble. If it were anyone else, they’d inevitably fall into a trap one day, and once they fell down, they’d never climb back up, spending the rest of their lives working for drug dealers and madams."

As they spoke, the plot seemed to fast-forward; Nina woke up from sleep, but it wasn’t a natural wake-up, she was disturbed by a phone call. Answering the phone, Andrew’s angry voice came through again.

Nina replied while crying, and finally lay helplessly on the bed, seeming to have no strength left. She lay there until night fell, then got up and sat at the table to apply her makeup.

From the moment she started putting on makeup, Deathstroke had a bad feeling. Having frequented various circles, he was quite knowledgeable about the underworld. Seeing Nina apply heavy makeup and prepare to go out in the middle of the night, he knew this terrible plot was about to head toward the sewage direction.