Chapter 328
I watched the scene in front of me, my eyelids twitching.
“Refit the train!”
Dozens of people—or more—had surged into Car 1, holding pickets and shouting.
But.
“Rabbit dolls for everyone!”
It was pink everywhere.
Every picket had bizarre phrases written on it: “Perfect Rabbit Doll,” “The Fluffy One’s Grace,” “Their forepaws are soft,” “To a wider place for us.”
They linked arms, and here and there I even saw people wearing rabbit-ear headbands made from cut-up cardboard boxes.
It was shocking, but judging by the flow of the past few days, I’d expected something shocking no matter which direction it went, so I could endure it.
But....
“Guarantee the rabbit~”
Deputy.
What on earth are you doing....
I fell into confusion as I stared at Deputy Eun Haje in the very front, subtly wedged in there, a necktie wrapped around their head as they thrust a hand out.
Right before I launched the rabbit-doll worship operation, I’d given Ko Yeongeun, Bronze Agent, and Deputy Eun Haje a rough explanation of what would happen.
-Rabbit-doll enthusiasts will suddenly multiply.
-What?
So I definitely told them there would be a commotion on the train, but....
How are you going to be the point man in that commotion....
On top of that, Deputy Eun Haje had slipped into the crowd and started figuring out the situation by eavesdropping and picking up bits and pieces.
“Ah~ it seemed like you were doing a good thing, so I pitched in too, hahahaha! Aha, so this... person is the one guiding you all to a good place, right?”
As the freshly joined “rabbit-doll worship” crowd pumped out generous little tidbits of information like they were pulling taffy, Deputy Eun Haje eventually even got to see their “rabbit-doll merchandise” with their own eyes.
“Oh....”
Deputy Eun Haje’s long, admiring sound lingered as they looked at the cute rabbit-doll head embossed on a jingling metal keyring....
“Our goal is to bestow this astonishing miracle upon everyone on the train, so that no one is discriminated against, and everyone receives the Stuffed Body’s grace.”
“Oh....”
“Isn’t that right, Distributor!”
Stop looking at me.
But people had already whipped around to stare at me, eyes glittering.
That’s right.
I was standing right in the middle of this picket crowd....
That title, Distributor, was something they’d insisted on calling me—“the one who started distributing rabbit dolls.”
I took it because it seemed like the perfect hat for being a sycophant.
I’d been smiling while deliberately glancing around like I wanted to flatter the loudest voices, and in the end, my eyes met Deputy Eun Haje’s.
“.......”
“.......”
This is so humiliating.
But my mouth was already smoothly spitting out the most sycophantic lines imaginable.
“Of course...! I’m just a fool who sells snacks, aren’t I? I completely trust everything you say, since you’re the ones who meet the Stuffed Body often...!”
“Distributor!”
Whew.
I hurriedly turned my gaze away and pretended not to see it as I watched Deputy Eun Haje’s eyes narrow, like they’d noticed something while looking back and forth between the rabbit-doll products people were holding and me.
Please go away, Deputy....
But the “Good Friend” inside the huge velvet box I was holding seemed pretty excited by this spectacle.
[Friend, as an entertainer who knows how to repay the audience’s support, this is rather enjoyable. I feel like giving them merchandise by raffle!]
[Indeed—how about selling special goods at your beautiful, modest resort?]
...Talk show products?
[Yes. Oh, this can be considered a formal proposal. A collaboration with “Brown’s Late-Night Talk Show.”]
In my head, I pictured a single gift-shop booth in the amusement park, set up as an old-fashioned retro section with wording like “Popular TV Program Appears.”
In a ghost story that already lures people, adding another ghost story that specializes in luring viewers....
N-no.
...Anyway, these people can’t actually go to the real YuKwae theme park. Even if we collaborate, it’ll be hard for them to buy that “rabbit doll.”
I chose my words.
[Hmm.]
For that to happen, you’d need to end this Se-gwang Special City ghost story and become free first!
Let’s just get cooperation, whatever it takes....
[Very well! Then let us continue the development, Mr. Noru.]
Whew.
But that relief lasted only a moment.
I met Deputy Eun Haje’s gaze again—their eyes oddly unreadable.
“Hm. Are you the representative of this group, Distribu...tor?”
“As if!”
I almost answered sincerely.
I quickly shrank in on myself and bowed my head low.
“I’m just someone holding one position among many, and the real representative is... ah, they’re coming now!”
They’re here!
“Representative!”
...A newly born cult leader, under a fake title, emerged with an air of dignity, pushing through the crowd from far in the back.
People naturally made way. Some believers even politely lowered the rabbit-ear headbands they were wearing.
I felt like laughing and crying at the same time.
“Did you all dream of rabbits?”
“I dreamed the stuffed dream!”
Where did a greeting like that even come from. I didn’t teach them that....
[Oh, this is truly a typical cult!]
The “Rabbit Doll Association Representative” looked the same as before.
The only difference was a single golden badge with a pink rabbit drawn on it pinned to their padded jacket. It was a badge I’d made by cutting up the tape merchandise with scissors.
They swept their melancholy eyes over the crowd, then turned to me and lifted a hand.
“Now. Bring the One.”
“Yes...!”
Being unsettled is one thing. Doing what needs doing is another.
I put on a flattering smile, then quickly raised the velvet case with both hands and opened it respectfully.
Dozens of people holding pickets stared into the velvet case with eyes full of longing, envy, and happiness....
At fluffy Brown.
[Welcome. Everyone!]
But that gaze was blocked by the Representative.
With solemn eyes, the Representative brought their face within inches of the doll, nodded, and studied it.
[My god, shoving your head within one foot in a private setting—what an unpleasant distance. Are you out of your mind?]
“Today as well, you are a dazzling and perfect form.”
[Out of my mind, perhaps, but your eyesight seems intact!]
“I want to attend you personally, but....”
[Ho. So a damages claim is a dream! Very well understood....]
Cold sweat poured down my back.
Still forcing a smile, I subtly pulled Brown back, as if I couldn’t dare demand such a thing of the Representative, speaking with the same polite tone as always.
“I will carry him with my life on the line, doing my absolute best. From this moment on, the Representative will lead us....”
“...Yes.”
With a sharp motion, the Representative neatly adjusted their padded jacket and stepped forward.
In the process, the jacket smacked Brown across the face. I swallowed my scream.
[Mr. Noru. Are you curious how I, Brown, deal with those who storm the stage during a live broadcast and block the camera?]
...Incineration?
[Correct! Oh, in celebration of your correct answer, the reenactment scene will now begi—]
N-no, it’s fine! I already enjoyed it in my head!
[Splendid imagination, friend.]
I nearly choked on my own saliva.
I lifted Brown’s case again, carefully, with both hands.
“Let’s march to the very front of Car 1!”
“Yes!”
And feeling my eye start to twitch, I slowly followed the picket-holders as they marched back toward the Driver’s Cab with solemn faces.
People who hadn’t joined the “Stuffed Body Religion” stared blankly at the spectacle, like they’d just witnessed some bizarre short-video shoot.
Ha....
How did things end up like this....
What I meant to create was a mysterious little secret religion.
A cult that spread quietly through the train via comforting dreams for exhausted people, eventually becoming the majority and sparking unrest that dispersed the Driver’s Cab’s power....
...But what we had now was a protest situation with a “You’re doing a good thing, fighting!” flavor.
Why?
[How about retracing the path you took, friend? Perhaps you chose a different direction at a crossroads!]
That was true.
*So.... *
I looked back over the past few days.
First... the point where things started branching out unexpectedly was....
Ah.
It was when I started putting messages into the amusement-park dream.
That little “Be kind to everyone” routine.
I made it because of that cult-candidate’s personality.
But the people who’d joined that vague, cheerful dance done by a rabbit mascot started attaching their own interpretations.
-The target is everyone! Here, doesn’t “kindness” mean handing over the rabbit doll’s symbol?
-Yes, it seems like they want to share their softness and warmth with more people!
-Maybe they appeared because they saw our weary situation, trapped on this train. They’re comforting those who are trapped and struggling!
-Then we should be harmonious instead of fighting among ourselves, and we shouldn’t look down on others.
-That’s right!
-That way, just as the Stuffed Body wishes, everyone on this train will meet them, won’t they!
A doctrine I’d never considered, never created, was forming all on its own.
That last one jumped a bit.
Still, isn’t it said that as long as you get to Seoul, the route doesn’t matter?
Anyway, it was true that unrest had broken out....
“Rabbit dolls for everyone!”
The protesters marched.
I was trailing at the very back, holding the velvet case with the Good Friend inside, “for the Stuffed Body’s safety,” when Deputy Eun Haje checked the room and sidled up to me.
“Noru.”
“.......”
“You... haven’t you already had more than enough of scam-religion flavor?”
“.......”
“Was it not enough?”
If there were a mouse hole, I’d crawl into it.
But then Deputy Eun Haje read the picket slogan, things like “The rabbit doll’s warmth saves us,” and their eyes turned strange.
“Still... this feels less like a scam religion and more like... a fandom group that crossed a line.”
Yes.......
To what extent?
So much that even other front-car residents weren’t feeling threatened or fleeing in terror—they were just watching, confused or blank-faced.
It seemed like their dopamine was popping.
Or they were thinking, What kind of insane dream is this?
“Guarantee it!”
The march of dozens was hard to miss, and when they finally reached the Driver’s Cab door, they shouted again.
Of course, I was included.
“Hey, you need to shout too.”
“...Guarantee it!”
...I’ll just be satisfied that I can hide my face behind the case holding Brown.
I slipped toward the back of the crowd and avoided eyes.
And after a while....
“W-what is all this!”
The Station Master came rushing out of the Driver’s Cab.
Wiping cold sweat and brushing snack crumbs off his waistband, he jammed his engineer’s cap down like it was a symbol of authority.
But he looked flustered at the sight of dozens of people.
His eyes darted, and then, as if he’d found an angle after recognizing faces among them, his expression brightened at last.
“No, if our front-car people have complaints, then of course, huh? We should listen, as public servants. But....”
The Station Master shrugged as he spotted rear-car faces mixed in.
“Well, it’s because there are some parasite types mixed in too—people who only want more and more.”
Divide and conquer.
“Send those people back, and let’s talk slowly among ourselves. I know our-car people are all reasonable.”
That padded-jacket middle-aged guy who’d tried to shove me once was standing in the line too, and the Station Master spoke slyly while looking at him.
But....
“So what if they’re from the rear cars!”
“Yeah!”
“We’re all people going through the same experience!”
It didn’t work on them at all.
Because their sense of group belonging had already changed.
“On a day like today, when everyone is suffering, everyone deserves comfort!”
In a different context, it would’ve been moving.
“And the Stuffed Body is the best friend for comforting people!”
A description weirdly close to the truth came out.
“Someone like you—who wouldn’t know, since you want to monopolize instead of sharing, exclude people, and swagger around!”
“That’s right!”
The Representative pointed at the Station Master.
“But!”
Then pointed at themselves.
“Even someone like you can change if you’re with a rabbit doll. Just like I did.”
Deputy Eun Haje muttered.
“This is kind of... socially positive influence.”
“.......”
“Isn’t this religion’s beneficial function? Why is it coming out here?”
Tell me about it.
[Interesting, friend. That ordinary and unpleasant fellow—did he not accept his place at once, puffed up with pride at being chosen as a special representative by you?]
He did.
[But now he opposes someone else’s special treatment. Oh, that illogic is nearly enough to evoke the theater of the absurd!]
Well... if I do it, it’s romance; if someone else does it, it’s an affair.
And once the numbers grow, as the leader, he becomes even more special.
Still, the oddity of this situation was that, compared to that stagnant, rotten Station Master, the Representative—this new flow, waving a banner of cause—was, in context, better.
“Let us experience their softness, their warmth, together.”
And yes, that was phrasing I’d spread....
It feels oddly like a mattress commercial? That’s your imagination.
Anyway, the Station Master finally started losing his mind.
“Aren’t you all just crazy!”
“Yes.”
If we were going to press momentum, now was the time.
I put on a shameless mask and stepped forward, answering with a serious expression like I was “scared, but speaking anyway.”
“We are all people who are crazy about rabbit dolls...!”
“Right!”
“The Representative leads us to the Perfect Rabbit Doll!”
“.......”
The Station Master looked speechless.
You can’t reason with crazy people.
Meanwhile, the Representative’s face grew more and more certain and brave as they kept talking.
People have a strange tendency.
If the people supporting you keep agreeing, you start believing your own claim more strongly, too.
Even if it’s a belief that doesn’t match your original disposition.
“So, please grant permission to supply rabbit dolls to everyone on the train!”
“Please!”
“Refit the train, so everyone can enjoy the same space equally!”
“Please!”
At the chants, the Station Master looked like he was thinking, What the hell do these lunatics even want?
And in the end, he shouted:
“Listen, I have the heavy responsibility of operating this train—so should you be yelling at someone like me over something so trivial! Huh? Ask the Station Attendant first and—”
“It’s already approved.”
“.......”
The Station Master fled back into the Driver’s Cab.
“He’s running!”
“Wait!”
People tried to grab him, but he’d already slipped into the Driver’s Cab and locked the door.
“Let’s pick the lock!”
“Should we break it?”
Wait!
I stopped the people who were trying to break the door.
“If the shelter gets damaged, that’s a big problem. How about we wait until he comes out...? I don’t think he can last very long....”
“Hm.... That’s true.”
“Let’s wait until the Station Master comes out.”
The situation had been about to explode, then calmed back down.
It helped that as bedtime neared, the “rabbit-doll worship” crowd grew more relaxed and happy.
Statistically, they were about to enjoy the amusement-park ad in their dreams.
“May you all dream of rabbits!”
“May the stuffed hand be with you.”
The “rabbit-doll worship” group sat their ground in Car 1, handing out all kinds of snacks to both that car and the onlookers, stirring up the mood.
Because if it looks good, it’s easier to lure people.
Other shelter residents were also getting hit squarely with the attention-grabbing ad effect and getting pulled in.
“Will you take one?”
“Uh... oh, popcorn.”
To the point that people from other cars were coming in and out of Car 1, and no one was picking fights or getting angry—instead it was a dopamine feast fueled by snacks.
The people who’d never come to Car 7 were the ones whose eyes went wild over the new snacks.
Numbers and atmosphere are scary.
And the rabbit-doll worship people took turns, rotating, and fell asleep in shifts.
“You must be tired....”
“It’s fine. Tonight, I’ll stay and protect the Stuffed Body...!”
Smiling, I refused people’s suggestions and stayed in Car 1 like I was on watch, monitoring the mood.
This is nothing like I expected, but it’s going smoothly....
Anyway, we’re getting to Seoul.
Now I just need to use this unrest to approach the Driver’s Cab.
I kept shouting slogans at an appropriate volume, scattering snacks with the practiced skill of a flyer part-timer, and planning my opening.
“Guarantee rabbit dolls! Here, take some snacks....”
“Yes.”
“.......”
“.......”
Wait.
“Section Chief?”
“Yes.”
I turned my head.
Section Chief Lee Jaheon, wearing a mask, was holding the snack I’d offered and staring blankly at me.
“.......”
“.......”
Why are you here.
“Mr. Noru.”
“It’s Podo.”
“Mr. Podo.”
I could see the lizard’s empty eyes.
The lizard’s blood-red eyes swept over the various Brown goods people were holding, then returned to me.
“Do you believe in rabbit dolls?”
“I-I suppose I do...?”
“.......”
“.......”
In a panic, I looked around and lowered my voice.
“We’re not a scam religion.”
“I see.”
The lizard nodded.
It seemed like he’d realized my implication that this was all an operation....
“Every scam religion says that.”
“.......”
I want to pass out.