How To Ruin A Love Comedy
Chapter 443
Renka sat with her legs folded neatly to one side, the very picture of modesty.
She looked like the perfect lady. Yet seeing her steal glances at me, only to coyly turn her head away the second our eyes met, was absolutely hilarious.
It was as if she were angry, yet deeply embarrassed at the same time.
She was acting out every classic tsundere cliché in the book.
We sat facing each other across the dining table.
Perhaps the silence was a bit too awkward for her. She gulped down the water I'd poured and pointed at the Figure Box sitting in the corner of the living room.
"Aren't you going to set it up?"
"I'll do it later."
"Suit yourself. Nice place."
"Thanks.""Yeah."
"Right."
"..."
"..."
"Where are the figures you bought?"
"Over there on the TV stand."
Renka followed my pointing finger, glancing over her shoulder.
Spotting the cluster of cute figures, she spoke up.
"They're cute."
"We bought them together."
"I know. Don't talk back."
"Understood."
"..."
"..."
"Actually, go ahead and talk back."
I knew I shouldn't laugh, but her sheer absurdity made my lips twitch.
Between telling me not to die the other day and pulling stunts like this... Renka was just too cute lately.
I wanted to pounce on her right then and there, but I had to be patient.
The longer the wait, the sweeter the reward.
"Have you eaten?"
"No."
"Want me to make you something?"
"Yeah."
Usually, she would have feigned indifference or told me to do whatever I wanted, but she agreed instantly.
She really must want to spend time with me.
"You really want to eat?"
"Isn't that why you offered?"
"Fair point."
"Then bring it out. You ate at my place, too."
"But that wasn't made by you, President. Your mother cooked..."
"Shut up. Hurry up and make the food before I just lie down right here."
"You could ask a little more nicely."
"Make me something, please."
The instant shift from a commanding bark to a polite request was comical.
She was never this brazen before, but stepping into my house seemed to have unlocked her expressive side.
Well, expressive for Renka, at least. She still couldn't compare to a normal person.
"Understood."
"But do you really cook your own side dishes?"
I shrugged at her question.
"No."
"Do you just order delivery?"
"No."
"Then are we just eating plain rice?"
"I have side dishes in the fridge."
"You just said you don't cook."
"Miyuki's parents packed them for me."
"Oh... You must be pretty close with Hanazawa's parents?"
"Well... I guess."
"You two aren't... childhood friends, though. Was it last year? Miura mentioned that you and Hanazawa had only met recently..."
Just how far had that bastard Tetsuya managed to spread this nonsense?
If it was last year, wasn't that right around the time Tetsuya had a crush on Renka and was wagging his tail at her like a puppy?
He should have stuck to talking about himself. Why go out of his way to bring up Miyuki and me?
Judging by Renka's reaction, it didn't sound like he'd been talking trash about me behind my back, but I still couldn't wrap my head around his motives.
Maybe it was some sort of calculated build-up—wagging his tongue to lay the groundwork before eventually ruining my reputation.
That insidious bastard seemed completely forgettable on the surface, but look closely, and it was a different story entirely.
To think his name would pop up in a situation like this... What a thorn in my side.
"Our houses are close, so we just ended up seeing each other a lot and got close."
"Is that right...?"
"Yeah. I'll get the food ready now, so just wait a bit. If you want to wash up, there's a bathroom next to the kitchen."
"I'm not washing up."
"Suit yourself."
"Wait, actually, I will."
"So are you washing up or not?"
"I said I will. Is your comprehension really that bad?"
"You didn't really need to add that last part."
"Then I take it back."
Why did her brazen attitude look so adorable to me...
In the past, she would have spat out a 'so what?', but the way she meekly retracted her words was surprisingly sweet.
"Don't you know you can't take back words once they're spoken?"
"I just canceled them, so I took them back."
"You're being completely unreasonable."
"Shut up. Look who's talking."
Seriously, why was this childish version of Renka so incredibly cute?
She was hitting every single one of my preferences today.
Chuckling, I opened the fridge and pulled out several containers of side dishes. Then, I grabbed a pack of instant rice from the drawer beneath the sink and held it out to her.
"Could you microwave this for two minutes?"
"Just the rice?"
"Yeah."
"What about the side dishes?"
"It's meat, so I'm going to stir-fry it in a pan. I'll handle heating up the rest. Leave it to me."
"Got it."
Renka took the instant rice and shoved her face right up close to the microwave.
She scrutinized the buttons one by one, clearly hunting for a 'heat rice' setting.
"You just need to set it for two minutes."
"Oh, right."
"Did you already forget what I just told you?"
Looking a bit sheepish, Renka peeled back a corner of the rice packaging and started the microwave.
"Shu..."
She was about to curse at me without even turning around, but then—
"Quiet."
Realizing she was going too far, she toned it down on her own.
At that, I turned my head, biting my lower lip hard as I pretended to sneeze.
I really didn't want to let her go. Should I just ask her to spend the night?
Teasing her as if we were going to sleep together and then pulling back would be its own form of neglect. Honestly, that sounded pretty good too.
"It's good."
That was Renka's verdict after tasting the meat Midori had seasoned.
I shot her a gentle smile.
"Right? Eat up."
"Yeah."
"If you're still hungry, you can have another bowl."
"Not really. Wait, no... I don't mean it tastes bad. I just have a small stomach..."
After giving that dismissive reply, Renka flinched and hurriedly corrected herself.
She was clearly worried that refusing would sound like an insult to Midori's cooking.
It was so like her—she really was kind-hearted beneath it all. I decided not to tease her over it.
"Got it."
With the TV off, the living room was incredibly quiet.
The only sound was the soft hum of the air conditioner on low. As she picked at her food, moving her chopsticks in small, delicate motions, she looked up at me.
"Let's set up the display case after we eat."
"Sure. What time are you heading home?"
"Why? Eager to get rid of me? Fine, I'll leave right now."
"That's not what I meant. Stop letting your imagination run wild."
"You're the one who said it like that."
"So it's my fault?"
"Exactly."
"Right. I'll be more careful from now on."
Fire instantly flared in Renka's eyes.
Normally, this would have sparked a round of our usual bickering. But by taking a step back and cutting off the argument entirely... Well, I'd been doing this a lot over the past few days, and it seemed she'd finally reached her limit.
Clack.
Renka slammed her chopsticks onto the table and scowled at me.
"What are you playing at?"
"What do you mean?"
Was she annoyed by my feigned ignorance?
She glared at me with blazing eyes, then let out a heavy sigh and snatched up her chopsticks again.
"Forget it."
Unlike earlier, she started shoving massive spoonfuls of rice into her mouth.
Chewing aggressively enough that I could practically hear the crunching, she polished off her portion in record time.
"I'm done."
"Already?"
"Yeah."
"Want to brush your teeth, then?"
"I don't have a toothbrush."
"Go to the main bathroom, there's a cabinet. Open the left door and you'll find a new toothbrush. Just use that one."
"Forget it. Just hurry up and finish eating."
"Why?"
"So we can leave."
"To go where?"
"The Hotel."
"The Hotel?"
"The one we always go to."
"Why there all of a sudden?"
"So we can do what you like."
"And what's that?"
"Do I really have to spell it out? Drop the innocent act."
Ah... our dear Renka.
Did she really think I was acting this way just to get into her pants?
No, that wasn't it. This was her own clumsy way of extending an olive branch.
She was terrible at expressing her emotions, and in the heat of the moment, her frustration had just manifested into this clumsy proposition.
Either way, answering her was going to be tricky.
A flat-out rejection would severely wound her pride.
But agreeing instantly would make my true colors a little too obvious.
And if I dodged the question, she'd act all triumphant, smugly claiming she knew it all along.
After taking hits all day, she finally threw a solid counterpunch.
She hadn't actually intended to fluster me, I'm sure, but it was still a good hit.
"That's a bit sudden. I'm slightly taken aback."
"After this, you're going to drop this little protest act of yours, starting tomorrow."
"What protest act?"
"Ignoring my messages, giving me short, indifferent answers... all of that."
"I ignored your messages because I was busy. As for the indifferent answers..."
"Shut up."
"Right."
"See? You're doing it again."
"You told me to shut up, so I shut up. Why are you picking a fight?"
"Then don't shut up."
"Should I just keep my mouth open?"
"Do you want to die? Are you trying to be funny?"
"No?"
"...You really know how to piss me off, you know that? So, are we doing this or what?"
"Hmm... Did you suggest that because you want to, President? Or did you suggest it because you think I want to?"
"Well..."
Renka's voice trailed off, her mouth slowly clicking shut.
I could practically see the gears turning in her head. Admitting it was the former would make her look desperate, but claiming the latter would make her feel cheap. She was trapped in her own agonizing dilemma.
While Renka hesitated, I scooped the last bite of rice into my mouth and pointed at the box she had brought as a gift.
"How do we set this up?"
"...We have to assemble it first..."
"Want to put it together with me?"
"There's no real need to do it together... You just slot the pieces in. Takes like a minute..."
"Let's just do it together anyway. Alright?"
"I mean... sure. If you want..."
Seeing her unconsciously brighten up the moment I changed the subject was so adorable I could have eaten her up.
Did she even realize she was twirling a strand of her hair around her finger?
"Give me a second. I'll clean this up."
"...I'll help."
"No need. I'm just tossing them in the sink."
"..."
With a faint pout, she quietly watched me clear the table.
She was clearly mortified by what she had blurted out in the heat of the moment. She really should think before she speaks...
I'd thought this before, but despite her prickly exterior, Renka's mental fortitude was actually the weakest out of all the heroines.
Once the dishes were dealt with, I folded up the dining table, leaned it in the corner, and set the Figure Box down between us.
As I peeled the tape off the box and pulled out the acrylic panels, their protective film still on, Renka—who had been watching me with her arms crossed—spoke up in a tiny voice.
"Hey."
"Yeah?"
"...About..."
"About what?"
"...Never mind."
"What was that? I couldn't hear you."
Feigning ignorance, I cupped a hand to my ear and leaned in closer. Renka bit her lip nervously and squeezed her eyes shut.
Then, just to make sure I heard her perfectly, she raised her voice.
"I said I'm sorry! What I said earlier... it was a mistake..."
My patience was reaching its absolute limit.
An overwhelming urge to pull her into a crushing hug and gently pat her all over was bubbling up inside me.
Fighting back the smile tugging at the corners of my mouth, I answered.
"I know."
Did my nonchalant tone and the faint smile on my lips give her courage?
She chewed on her reddish lips, slowly averting her eyes as she spoke.
"I really, truly hate you, you know."
"Right."
"But... not today."
She hadn't actually said the words "I like you," but her true feelings came through loud and clear...
It was such a delightfully cheeky confession—so ridiculously cute that it finally shattered my composure, drawing a laugh out of me.
"Don't laugh...! Shut up...! If you laugh one more time, I'll kill you!"
As she shrieked at me, her face completely flushed, she looked more adorable than she had in months.
Hearing her unprompted confession at the Hotel had been great, but this was perfectly satisfying in its own right.
Paradoxically, seeing her like this only made me want to keep ignoring her.
I couldn't help but wonder just how far her limits could be pushed.
Still, I'd better leave it at that for today.
It was obvious she had just made a massive leap of courage, and giving her the cold shoulder any further would just be cruel.
With that in mind, I silently tapped my own cheek.
She gave a full-body shudder, then slowly shuffled over to me on her knees.
Then, she pressed her lips against my cheek—so lightly I could barely even feel it.
"There...? A-Are you satisfied now, you Trash...?"
She was wearing an expression of pure humiliation—an absolute contrast to how she must have been feeling on the inside.
I gave her denim-clad leg a gentle double-pat and nodded.
"Yeah, this is nice."
"The cord... If you plug it in, the LED light inside turns on... Plug it in, or don't. Whatever..."
The sound of Renka mumbling as she pointed at the power cord in my hand was music to my ears.
This was exactly the side of Renka I had always wanted to see. I was thrilled to have filled my quota for the day.
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