Chapter 935: I’m going to buy New Black at the supermarket (6)

Before going on a variety show, I tend to run simulations.

If something happens, I plan how I’ll respond.

So while preparing for a childcare show, I did imagine kids crying.

—Waaah!

—Why are you crying?

—I fell!

A kid tripping and bursting into tears.

Or crying because they want a toy.

Those were the kinds of situations I expected.

But—

“Waaah!”

“Waaah!”

Just because I did ventriloquism with a baguette—

I never thought they’d cry like this.

The three kids wailed loudly, and we panicked.

“W-what do we do?”

“Hyung! The kids are crying?!”

The members rushed to comfort them—“Peekaboo!” “Don’t cry!”—but it didn’t work.

The crying didn’t stop easily.

In moments like this...

“It’s okay.”

I crouched down to their eye level and smiled.

“......”

“......”

As expected, the crying stopped.

I gently wiped away their tears and hugged them.

“Sorry for scaring you.”

“Mm...”

“You must’ve been really surprised.”

“Yeah...”

Pat pat.

Even in that short time, their cheeks were damp with tears.

“Were you really scared?”

“Yeah.”

“What was scary?”

Yeoul pointed at the baguette from afar.

“That scary bread talked.”

“The bread talked?”

“Mm.”

The kids looked at the “Baguette Uncle” with fear.

They didn’t even consider that I was the one speaking.

“But does it look scary?”

Junghyun tilted his head.

“I thought we made it pretty cute.”

“Right.”

From our perspective, it didn’t seem scary at all.

It was just a baguette with tomato slices for eyes.

Even had a mustard mustache.

“Scary...”

“Scary?”

Well, if the kids think it’s scary, then it’s scary.

We should move it away.

I glanced at the baguette.

“Junghyun.”

“Yes.”

At my signal, Junghyun took off the cabbage we’d used as “hair” and popped it into his mouth.

The baguette was now bald.

“!”

“!!”

The kids looked shocked.

Their eyes filled with tears again.

“Waaah!”

“Waaah!”

I rubbed my temples.

“Junghyun.”

“...Weren’t you telling me to eat it?”

“I meant remove it...”

The kids cried, shouting “It’s bald!”

I comforted them again.

Then said to the members,

“...Let’s change the puppet.”

Whatever else, we couldn’t use that one.

“Alright, time to say goodbye to Baguette Uncle.”

“Bye!”

“Okay, Baguette Uncle is leaving~”

Jiho carried it away to the kitchen.

The kids waved enthusiastically.

I added a final line with ventriloquism.

[Kids! Sorry for scaring you!]

With Baguette Uncle gone, we finally relaxed.

“Phew.”

“Whew.”

We’d managed it.

We didn’t want to leave them with a bad memory, so we worked to remove their fear.

We even recreated the cabbage hair.

[Kim Junghyun! Because of you, I went bald!]

“I’m sorry... sir—no, Uncle.”

[Reflect on your actions!]

“I’m sorry...!”

With a bit of skit acting, we made Baguette Uncle friendly again.

Ri Hyuk said,

“Still, we should use something else.”

“Yeah.”

It took ten minutes just to warm them up to it.

Other kids would probably react the same.

If we brought it out again later—

They’d definitely cry.

“Cancel the Baguette plan.”

Plan A: failed.

Biju spoke.

“It’s probably best to match what the kids like. Animals, maybe.”

“That’s a good idea.”

We asked the kids.

“Any animals you like?”

“Rabbit!”

“Lion!”

“Tiger!”

“Crocodile! It brushes teeth with birds!”

“Elephant!”

“Dinosaur!”

They listed endlessly.

We thought about it.

Which one would be easiest?

“Rabbit.”

“Rabbit.”

That seemed safest.

We often got rabbit items from fans anyway.

I called our manager.

“Could you grab a rabbit plush from the mart? Or any animal plush.”

—Got it. I’ll be quick.

“Thanks.”

With that handled—

“We should prepare a song too.”

“A song?”

“Yeah. I saw kids’ programs—MCs sing.”

We asked the kids what songs they liked.

“Ri Hyuk.”

“Yes?”

“Don’t use falsetto...”

“Occupational habit.”

Even simple songs became harmonized.

Unnecessarily sweet.

Then—

“Different kids know different songs.”

“Right.”

“So maybe...”

I suggested,

“What if we teach them a new song?”

The members smiled.

“Hyung.”

“Yeah?”

“You just want to make one, don’t you?”

“Yeah!”

They laughed.

It was true.

Listening to kids’ songs made something stir inside me.

“Can you do it in time?”

“I already did.”

“Where?”

“In my head.”

“......”

“It’s simple. Repeating melody, slight variations.”

“That makes sense.”

“Since when could you compose kids’ songs?”

“I studied it in the military.”

Back then, I was so into it I’d say things like, “Let’s go eat, Eunseong.”

Guess everything comes in handy someday.

I strummed the ukulele.

“Not bad.”

The kids’ reaction?

“Waaah!”

They loved it.

Then—

Ding dong.

The managers arrived.

“Thanks, hyung. The plush—”

We froze.

“......”

“......”

Huge boxes.

Biju blinked.

“What is all this?”

“You said animal plush, so we bought everything animal-related nearby.”

“......”

The managers smiled proudly.

We realized something.

‘They’re too competent...!’

“Ta-da.”

They even wore sunflower bibs.

We burst out laughing.

Evening.

Families gathered.

“Let’s go meet NewBlack!”

“You’re about to meet the most famous people in the country.”

Excited chatter.

They carried gifts.

They wanted to get closer.

Maybe even text them someday.

Then—

They arrived.

“Hello!”

“Hello!”

Everyone gasped.

‘Wow.’

‘They’re so handsome.’

Radiant.

They greeted the kids.

“Hi.”

“Ah... hi...”

Yubin, age seven, stammered.

Wooju smiled.

“What’s your name?”

“I—I’m Yubin...”

“I’m Wooju.”

“I know...”

“Do you?”

His voice was sweet.

His face glowed.

“...I like you.”

“Thank you.”

The younger kids stared.

“Ma... ma...”

“First time meeting mart uncles?”

“Mart uncles!”

The older kids smirked proudly.

Meanwhile—

The parents noticed something.

A smell.

They opened a pot.

Japchae.

Cookies.

Grilled beef.

“Biju!”

“Yes?”

“Did you make this?”

“Yes, with Wooju and Yeoul.”

“Can we eat?”

“Of course!”

They heated it.

“!”

“!!”

Eyes widened.

“Is this recipe going to be on the show?”

“Probably not...”

“It has to be!”

They were amazed.

Then—

They looked toward the living room.

Animal plushies everywhere.

A sign:

[Welcome to the zoo!]

Lights dimmed.

Spotlight on.

Wooju introduced them.

“Say hello! This is Bear Junghyun!”

“I’m Junghyun bear.”

Cheers.

“And Chef Uncle Biju!”

“Hello~”

“A deer!”

“And Uncle Ri Hyuk!”

“...Ri Hyuk... meow...”

“And our youngest, Uncle Jiho!”

“I’m Fox Uncle!”

A child raised a hand.

“Does Uncle Jiho have a job?”

“He’s still a baby uncle~”

Laughter.

“What about Wooju?”

“I’m the zoo director!”

“Boss!”

Then—

“There’s one more guest.”

“?”

“Rabbit Uncle!”

“Rabbit!”

“Call him loudly!”

“Rabbit Unclllle!”

Silence.

“Maybe he’s shy.”

“Rabbit Unclllle!”

Again.

“Once more!”

“Rabbit Unclllle!”

Then—

A rabbit puppet appeared.

Lively.

The kids’ eyes sparkled.

[Hello! I’m Rabbit Uncle!]

“Waaah!”

“Rabbit Uncle!”

The kids were completely immersed.

The parents watched.

“Wow... he’s really good at ventriloquism.”

“...Wait.”

They paused.

Looking at Wooju and the puppet.

Blink.

‘...Why does an idol know ventriloquism?’