Chapter 261 - 259: Afraid of Being Unable to Communicate After Marriage

Chapter 261: Chapter 259: Afraid of Being Unable to Communicate After Marriage

"I think... maybe when it’s time for me to get married?" The woman’s tone was uncertain; it was clear she wasn’t sure herself.

Zhang Zhe shook his head. "You don’t mislead guys like this when you’re on a blind date, do you?"

"You need to either find a chance to ask your family for a clear answer, or when you go on dates, just be direct and say your family can’t offer any financial support."

"There’s no shame in your family not being able to help out. Plenty of people get married these days by relying on themselves."

"But my family *doesn’t* favor my brother over me!" the woman retorted. "Growing up, they never held back on my daily expenses."

"That’s because your brother isn’t at the age where he has to compete with you for money yet."

[Brother Zhang gets it.]

[How much do daily expenses even cost? Can it compare to a house or a car?]

[This girl is at war with herself.]

[You guys don’t get it. A naive girl like this actually makes the best wife.]

[I feel like getting her PhD didn’t do much for her intelligence. Now I get why she didn’t go to a top school.]

It wasn’t strange for the woman to think this way. The age gap between her and her brother was so large that there would be no real impact until it was time to get married, start a career, and divide the inheritance.

But marriage was precisely the time when these factors had to be considered.

Zhang Zhe could already tell that this woman wasn’t going to wrap her head around this concept anytime soon, or perhaps she was still holding out some hope for her family.

Perhaps she was right.

So he decided not to get hung up on this point for now.

"Look, let’s just assume for a moment that your family doesn’t favor your brother. Let’s focus on you."

"What do you look like?"

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?"

Zhang Zhe posted his rating criteria to avoid a repeat of a previous caller, who had given herself a very "middle-of-the-road" 5 and amused the entire stream audience.

"If we’re going by your criteria, streamer, I guess I’m a 3."

"Okay, I get it," Zhang Zhe nodded.

A 3 was a threshold on his stream. Any woman who rated herself a 3 knew she wasn’t pretty and couldn’t benefit from the "attractiveness bonus," but also didn’t think she was ugly.

Their actual score was usually between a 2 and a 3.

Seeing as this woman hadn’t even posted any photos on her Xiaohongshu page, she was most likely below a 2.5.

"Let me summarize your situation for you: you’re the kind of average person who, in terms of looks or figure, would be hard to pick out of a crowd."

"Right now, your only shining quality is your education."

"Anything to add?"

"No." The woman was fairly clear-eyed about her situation. "I knew I had no future competing on looks, so I started competing on academics instead."

"But now that I’ve finished my PhD, I’m actually a little lost."

"I don’t know what kind of person I should be looking for."

"You really have no idea at all?" Zhang Zhe was skeptical. "You must at least have a general idea, right? What’s your ideal type?"

"Or what type of guys have you had crushes on throughout your life?"

"Well, I do have a type."

"I’m someone who’s attracted to power. I like guys who are a bit more capable than me."

[A PhD who’s attracted to power? You’ll have to find an academician then.]

[I suggest she just go for her PhD advisor. Get it all done in one step.]

[Usually when a girl says she’s ’attracted to power,’ she means she wants a rich guy. But since she’s a PhD, I’m not so sure.]

[’Attracted to power’ just means she wants to marry up. In her situation, that’s basically impossible.]

"’Being attracted to power’ can mean many things," Zhang Zhe analyzed carefully. "Do you value earning potential, academic credentials, or something else?"

"You can’t be looking for a guy who’s a perfect 10 in every category, can you?"

"I think his education should be on par with mine, and he just needs to have slightly better earning potential."

After saying this, the woman added, "Sir, I’m perfectly fine with two people building a future together."

Meaning, she could accept a guy who didn’t have money now, as long as he had potential.

"On par with your education?"

"Are you looking for another PhD from a top-tier university? Or is a master’s degree good enough?"

"A PhD would be best, but a master’s is also fine."

"Then why didn’t you find someone when you were in school?" Zhang Zhe was perplexed. "When you were doing your master’s and PhD, you were surrounded by people with master’s and PhDs. You didn’t look then, but you’re waiting until after graduation to look for someone out in the real world?"

"You’re taking the long way around, sis."

"When I was in school... I looked. I just didn’t find anyone," the woman said, embarrassed.

[You couldn’t find anyone in school, and you think you’ll find someone after graduating?]

[That means in the eyes of the PhDs and master’s students at her own school, she had zero appeal.]

[She’s just been in school for too long. She’s still using an academic mindset to judge people, thinking degrees and grades are the most important things.]

[Someone like her will get it after working at a big tech company for a couple of years.]

"Have you ever considered this question, sis? Outside of a campus romance, when would a man with a PhD choose to marry a woman with a PhD?"

"Well... I don’t know."

"Let me tell you. It’s most likely when he can’t find a younger, prettier girl, is in a rush to get married, and realizes a female PhD is his only option," Zhang Zhe said, his expression calm.

He had seen plenty of profiles from matchmaking agencies; male PhDs almost all wanted to find someone younger, and the highest educational requirement they typically had was just a bachelor’s degree.

"You probably don’t really understand the rules of the modern dating market."

"The most popular trend right now is complementary pairing. You have a key strength in Area A, and he has a key strength in Area B. When you get together, your family unit then has two key strengths, A and B."

"A PhD is a key strength."

"A lot of male PhDs are willing to use that strength to try and trade up for a woman’s family background or looks. If he also looks for a PhD, then during the ’marriage negotiations,’ his own key strength is nullified."

"To someone with a bachelor’s or associate’s degree, you’re highly educated. But from what I’ve observed, once people have finished their master’s degree, the ’PhD’ has completely lost its mystique."

[Most PhD programs in this country only test one thing: your ability to endure hardship.]

[I messed around in a lab for two years as an undergrad, and I’m disenchanted with PhD students too. Damn, all they knew how to do was order me around.]

[Brother Zhang’s point is, sis, you need to find someone who worships your degree.]

[When it comes to value exchange, the Matchmaker knows what’s up.]

’So my whole approach is wrong?’ the woman mumbled to herself. "But if our education levels are different, won’t we be unable to communicate after we get married?"

"What do you plan on communicating about after marriage?" Zhang Zhe gave a helpless laugh. This was another classic case of a woman who idealized marriage.

"Sis, in your eyes, is your parents’ marriage a happy one?"

"Of course it’s happy. I think they have a great relationship."

"Mm, then this is simple." Zhang Zhe nodded. He believed the woman when she said her parents had a good relationship.

A couple with a bad relationship wouldn’t have had a second child when their daughter was sixteen.

If their relationship was bad, they would have been fighting for a divorce while their daughter was in high school.

"Go home and carefully observe and take notes on what your parents talk about on a daily basis. See how much of it is about work, how much is about humanity, nature, and the universe, and then you’ll know what normal married couples actually talk about."

Zhang Zhe already knew the standard answer. A few years into a marriage, a couple’s conversations basically revolve around their kids, daily chores, and office gossip.

Those who shared hobbies might have a few more topics related to them.

In reality, this was what most married couples talked about.

As for their inner spiritual lives, everyone just found their own ways to satisfy themselves, which is why you see situations where the wife stays home to watch dramas and the husband goes out fishing after marriage.

However, Zhang Zhe didn’t give the PhD woman the answer directly.

She was a PhD, after all. He just needed to give her a research topic; he trusted she had the ability to figure out the rest on her own.