Chapter 454 part 1

Day 103 – Evening, White Weirdo Inn

It apparently started with an innocent misunderstanding that led him into the wrong place, then, through a bit of careless chance, he kept going without noticing, and our self-proclaimed Innocent Highschool Boy ended up killing the Dungeon Master of a deep dungeon and came back all tattered and messed up. I heard the exact same excuse just yesterday, so we have a repeat offender here.

「No, see, there was this crazy turtle compressing an enormous amount of magic inside its body, so I rushed to kill it, and then it instantly died? Yeah, it was a turtle, so it was tough, and my hands hurt, so Stalker Girl was worried and eating snacks, and Slime-san was eating too, which proves I didn’t do anything wrong? Besides, Stalker Girl had already gone through three Dungeons and was tired, so just let this one slide?」

「Uh-huh, Stalker Girl-chan is obviously innocent without a shadow of doubt! What I can’t forgive is the person who’s always doing shady and dubious stuff and is always proven guilty in the end! Even if I generously concede that the Dungeon Master was dangerous and you had to take some drastic measures in a hurry, what were you doing going to another deep dungeon in the first place! Why are you going out to commit a mistake every day!」

I thought he’d behave himself now that his level had finally gone up, but I was naïve, once his level goes up, he just goes out to 『Test』it. Even if yesterday’s test ended in disaster, the next day he’s at it again!

「Why? Because I took a wrong turn? Just ask Stalker Girl about it! The first two were mid-level Dungeons, but only the third one accidentally happened to be a deep dungeon, so in terms of correct/incorrect ratio, I was over fifty percent correct, and a small slip-up like that is within the margin of forgiveness, right? I didn’t notice, so it can’t be helped? Good grief?」

「Even if I accept that going past the 50th floor was an unnoticed mistake, there’s no way you didn’t realize by the time you got to the 90th floor! That wasn’t a case of 『didn’t notice』 it was 『ignored it purpose』! Stalker Girl-chan was shouting at the top of her lungs for you to stop, and you plugged your ears with both hands and went, 『La la la, can’t hear, can’t hear!』 At that point it’s obvious you weren’t just making a mistake, you were deliberately going there to make a mistake, two days in a row!」

Since we’ll be traveling from tomorrow, today is the final dungeon attack day, which is why I even assigned Stalker Girl-chan to watch him, but he has still gone and done it. Two mid-level dungeons and one deep dungeon. With this all of the deep dungeons in the area are gone, and most of the mid-level Dungeons close to human settlements are also destroyed.

「But Dungeons don’t have floor indicators, you know? If they’d just written on the stairs, 『This is the 70th floor』 I would’ve noticed. This was an unfortunate accident caused by the monsters’ unkindness and the administrator’s lazy negligence. I gave the management (Dungeon Master) a good talking-to so I’m sure they are reflecting on it now? The Dungeon Master too? It’s dead though?」

「Who’s blaming Dungeon Master-san here! And why are you twisting this into an issue about management responsibility! And why in the world should the monsters have to put floor numbers on the stairs themselves! It’s a dungeon, not an apartment building. Dungeons don’t have floor indicators, and even without being told by the monsters, Haruka-kun, you have the 『Map』skill, so you knew what floor you were on!」

It’s true that when adventurers clear Dungeons in groups, they’ll sometimes write the floor number and monster info on the stairs for each level, but that’s when they take several days or weeks to conquer it. When you clear it in a single day, who’s going to write the numbers!? The monsters?

「Why is it so hard for anyone to accept such a harmless mistake? I even went out of my way to clear two mid-level Dungeons before going to the wrong one, and still no one trusts me? Maybe I should’ve done one more Dungeon before doing the 『mistake』 but then I’d be getting home late, you know?」

「Yeah, I’m pretty sure the problem is with how Haruka-kun understands the meaning of the word 『mistake』 in the first place! The very existence of a phrase like 『going to do a mistake』is itself a mistake!」

Haruka-kun didn’t say that he made a mistake, he went out of his way to commit them. A mistake made deliberately isn’t a mistake anymore!

Sure, mistakes can happen, but there’s no such thing as intentionally going to make one! If you knew it was wrong and still went, that’s not 『I made a mistake』 that’s deliberately going to commit one yourself.

In other words, he’s a recidivist who is willingly and deliberately commits mistakes and then insists『Well, it was a mistakeso it can’t be helped』. And today again, there seems to be zero hope for reform.

The Dungeon Master on the 90th floor was 『Kim Quy Lv 100』 a massive turtle named after the divine turtle of Vietnam tales, a huge, sluggish giant. But it possessed 『Perfect Reflection』 『Physical Immunity』『Absolute Defense』and even 『Complete Immunity』, skill that made it impossible to destroy. A level 100 Dungeon Master.

And apparently, although its movements were slow, it was compressing a massive amount of magic inside its body. A fortress you can’t destroy, armed with a ranged weapon, that’s a threat of truly monstrous proportions. That’s exactly why the 90th-floor Dungeon Master is on the list of things we’re forbidden to fight, and why, it seems, there was a need to kill it instantly with full force.

I really, really want to be angry, but we were the ones who left the watching duty to Stalker Girl-chan. So, to avoid getting her caught up in danger, he forced himself, went beyond his limits, and cut down an unkillable monster in a single blow. In exchange, his whole body was destroyed, his nerves scorched with hellish pain that burned through his brain, blood erupting from every part of him while his body kept being regenerated and destroyed again in the raging torrent of magic… and still he remained standing. All because of my shallow idea to 『level Stalker Girl-chan up while she’s on watch duty』. …Though, wasn’t that Dungeon supposed to be 80 floors at most?

The urge to scream and scold him and the desire to cry and beg him not to be so reckless were both blown away, like gratin and doria vanishing into the mist. The smell of baked white sauce and cheese had everyone writhing. Scolding stopped, faltered and dissolved, my heart stolen by the plates being lined up as I agonized over which to eat first. He’d planned for a deep dungeon from the start, this was an anti-lecture dinner-weapon, with overwhelming, overkill lecture-destroying power. The girls couldn’t wait, squirming with pained expressions under a 『Stay!』 order. The orphanage comes first, so, patience!

Kakizaki-kun’s group, however, couldn’t 『Stay』 and ended up bound in chains by Nephertiri-san, forcibly put on hold… their fiancees couldn’t be allowed to see the pitiful faces they made, as they stared at the gratin and doria with teary eyes.

「I know the orphanage gets theirs first, but…」 「Yeah, watching Gratin-san and Doria-san just pass right by us is cruel!」 「Calling this a torture would be an understatement.」 「Yep, if I was now told『sorry, sold out』 I’m confident I’d riot!」 「It’s maddening how there’s always a new menu ready for the times he is about to get seriously scolded.」 「「「Haruka! We’re starving! We’re gonna die! Starvation death is imminent!」」」 「Sit!」 「No!」 「Stay!」 「「「We’re not dogs! But this smell! Hungry, hungry, starving here!」」」 「This is my first time seeing this dish, but… it looks so good… ah, my vow of frugality is about to be shattered…」 「Oh, it is good~, and if Haruka-kun made it, then~ it’s basically heavenly delicious~?」 「「「Kyaaa! Don’t say that! We can’t hold anymore!」」」

At last, the orphanage delivery portion was finished. Even the nursery workers were drooling while carrying Gratin-san and Doria-san. Everyone was suffering, everyone enduring, everyone doing their best, just a little longer! Plates flowed like on a conveyor belt, filling the tables. I thought it was 『Holding』 magic, but after closer look it was actually an ultra-fine magic-thread slider system. Yes, distraction was necessary to endure, just a little longer until we could say 『Itadakimasu!』