Chapter 57: Exploring The Shop
Chapter 57: Chapter 57: Exploring The Shop
The remaining two sections were a completely different story. The first thought that flashed through his mind was the prospect of premium lingerie!
If apparel were available, then there would absolutely be an endless variety of alluring outfits, and exquisite undergarments would undoubtedly be among them.
As for the gifts section, that was a highly welcome surprise.
Owen immediately deduced its practical utility: offering the right presents would surely boost his favorability with his gorgeous targets.
He just needed to provide exactly what they desired, and the results would be pure magic!
"Let’s check out the abilities first. I don’t exactly need any new ones at the moment, but perhaps I’ll spot something decent," Owen murmured, selecting the skill tab.
The interface shifted smoothly.
Ding!
[Notice: MILF Tokens are the only accepted currency here.]
[Spend your hard-earned tokens wisely! Happy shopping and happy spending!]
Ding!... ding... ding...
"Oh, so the capability tiers are properly categorized. This setup really isn’t half bad," Owen observed, noting the classifications spanning from Rank C all the way up to Rank SSS.
Without wasting any time, Owen tapped on the lowest tier.
He wanted to see what kind of entry-level attributes were available, thinking they might offer some niche utility in the future.
[Crappy Cringe Talker: Rank C]
[Are you seriously wasting your time reading about such a garbage Skill? The name itself tells you everything you need to know...]
[Cost: Free!!!]
Owen’s expression stiffened just as he was about to select the full description, halted by the system’s blunt mockery.
"You really are an eccentric entity, you know that? For all I know, you’re the only interface in existence that completely ignores its own script," Owen muttered to himself, scrolling past the worthless option.
He completely overlooked the fact that it was priced at zero; it was entirely useless to him, which explained the lack of a price tag.
[Muscle Flex: Rank C]
[ Allows you to strike dramatic poses for your companions, though it’s completely useless if you’re trying to indulge in ’Aura Farming.]
[Cost: 1 MILF Token]
"What on earth? What kind of ridiculous description is that?! This is completely unnecessary," Owen grumbled, thoroughly unimpressed by the bizarre modern jargon tacked onto the end.
What was the point of trying to farm aura?
This wasn’t an epic action-fantasy chronicle, so needing something like that was just absurd.
"I fully expected to find a lot of garbage in the bargain bin, but let’s take one final look,"
Owen decided, casting a last glance over the Rank C catalog.
"Hoh... what do we have here?"
Owen was surprised to spot an intriguing title that seemed like a potential hidden treasure amidst the junk.
[Shape Shift: Rank C]
[ Your cock can alter its form to whatever form you desire... whether you fancy the dick of a stallion or something far more exotic...it’s up to you! (◠‿◕) ]
[Note: Purchase this only if you want your cock to swell up and completely rot away!!!]
"Mhpf.. cough!... cough!..."
Owen nearly choked on his own saliva as he read the note.
"Fucking hell! This is different from trash!" Owen nearly had a heart attack, almost biting his tongue at the ridiculous note from the system.
What’s the point of having a chance to change your thing if it will rot?!
It’s like a one-night stand...do or die.
It immediately reminded him of those sketchy, underground cosmetic enhancements people injected into themselves; they might provide a temporary illusion of grandeur, but the consequences always turned disastrous...for real, it’s even a tragedy!
He certainly had no desire to experience a literal anatomical deformity.
Owen already got a divine...so why would he choose such a disgusting thing?
Well...it’s only for those desperate ones.
If Owen can share such a skill, then he will gladly give it to those pitiful souls.
A good man should share his goods, as goodwill is more important than anything.
Sharing is caring... that’s what Owen believes
"I swear, reading these descriptions is actively lowering my IQ...even rotting my mind," Owen muttered, promptly closing out the Rank C tab with a firm resolve never to venture into that dumpster fire again.
The only disaster that’s waiting for him out there.
Absolutely nothing of value was to be found there...just pure, unadulterated nonsense.
Tap... tap...
Ding!
Abandoning all restraint, Owen bypassed the mid-tier options and headed straight for the prestigious SSS Rank categories.
Now, the genuine masterpieces were finally going to be unveiled!
"Don’t disappoint me now..." He clasped his hands together in anticipation as he watched the progress bar fill, reminiscent of a high-end video game loading its latest resource updates.
Ding... ding... ding...
[Don’t Look At Me: SSS Rank]
[Seriously, don’t look at me...]
[Cost: You are far too poor to even ask.]
"For heaven’s sake! How is that even classified as an SSS skill?!" Owen nearly flipped the coffee table in sheer exasperation at the utterly pointless text, added by the blatant insult in the pricing column.
He could practically feel his sanity slipping away.
He would bet everything that the system was currently laughing hysterically at his expense from some abstract dimension.
He promptly tapped the exit button, unable to stomach any more ridiculous descriptions.
He already possessed a flawless, broken synergy of divine 12-inch-long cock, he really did not need these external injections anyway.
"Alright, let’s look at something more promising... the apparel section," Owen murmured, focusing his eager attention on the clothing icon.
Ding... ding... ding...
Owen watched the loading sequence briefly before the screen finally populated with fresh data.
"Whoa! Now this is spectacular... not bad at all." Owen marveled as the screen filled with an extensive array of wardrobe selections; there were so many that he couldn’t pick any of them at the moment.
The catalog featured everything from elegant evening dresses and form-fitting professional uniforms to incredibly daring, provocative ensembles...and there was even a beautifully detailed maid outfit displayed.
Even the cow lingerie...oh man, that’s a bust!