Chapter 109 God of Laughter

Once the performance ended and the crowd dispersed, Vane and the Emperor finally took off the Hat of the Forgotten.

The moment they did, the Harlequins and the theater staff noticed their presence and immediately bowed in reverence.

“Father!”

Magnus, stripped of his power and locked inside the exhibition cage, excitedly shouted the second he saw the Emperor.

“Father, please save me!”

Without his unparalleled psychic might and Tzeentch’s twisted blessings, Magnus had reverted to his original, pathetic state. Locked inside the cage, he had been reduced to nothing more than a clown on display.

Hearing the cries of his former son, the Emperor walked up to the bars and stared at Magnus, who had been dressed up in a ridiculous jester outfit.

“I thought you forgot I was your father.”

“Father, I know I was wrong. Please, I’m begging you, make them let me go,” Magnus pleaded.

Ever since he was captured, the Aeldari had stripped him of all his powers and dark blessings. They shoved him into a cage as a sideshow attraction. Every single day, mortals would gather around to gawk, hurl insults, and throw rotten fruit and eggs at him. It was a complete and utter humiliation; he wished he were dead.

Magnus secretly swore to himself that if the Emperor was willing to bail him out, he would be willing to give his father another chance to rebuild their relationship.

The Emperor looked Magnus up and down and let out a scoffing laugh.

“Let you go?”

A glimmer of hope appeared in Magnus’s eye. “Yes. Let me go.”

“Keep dreaming. Not a snowball’s chance in hell.”

The Emperor, dressed in casual clothes, rolled up his sleeves. “But I can slap the ever-loving shit out of you.”

A second later, two glowing golden hands materialized out of thin air. They grabbed Magnus by the collar and started slapping him senseless.

Smack! Smack!

“Magnus, I have wanted to do this for ten thousand years!”

“You completely ruined my plans, and you still have the sheer fucking audacity to blame me for it?!”

“I told you to stop messing around with dark rituals! I told you not to delve into the Warp! I told you to show some damn humility and restraint!”

“You didn’t listen to a single word! You were arrogant, egotistical, and vain! And when you fucked it all up, you blamed all your mistakes on me!”

Back during the Siege of Terra, Magnus had hidden inside the Webway, using his sorcery to assault the Golden Throne in an attempt to help the Chaos Gods secure their victory. Vulkan had been ordered to intercept him, and the two had gotten into a massive screaming match over the very nature of his betrayal.

At the time, Magnus’s excuses made the Emperor’s blood pressure skyrocket so high it could’ve powered a generator.

What do you mean, your mistakes are all my fault because I didn’t tell you the Warp was dangerous? Because I didn’t tell you about the Webway Project? Because I didn’t tell you the entities in the Warp were full of malice?!

“I told you on the exact fucking day we met! I said don’t dig too deep into the Warp, don’t trust the creatures in there, and don’t arrogantly ignore my orders!”

The more the Emperor thought about it, the madder he got, and the harder he slapped him. The onlookers sweat bullets, too terrified to make a peep, afraid that the Emperor, in a fit of rage, would turn around and smack them too.

In no time, Magnus was beaten black and blue, half his face completely swollen.

After finishing his venting, the Emperor felt so good his soul practically left his body. He had bottled those words up for ten thousand years. Today, he finally felt at peace.

“Father,” Magnus begged bitterly, his face beaten to a pulp, “if you’re done being mad, please just let them release me.”

“No,” the Emperor shook his head. “This is exactly what you deserve, Magnus.”

“You buried the dream of humanity and caused countless people to suffer. No punishment is too severe for you.”

With that, the Emperor turned and walked away, too lazy to waste another breath on his traitorous son. Let him rot in the cage and be a laughingstock for the world. He earned it.

“Don’t go, Father!” Magnus cried out, desperately trying to make him stay, but the Emperor didn’t look back even once.

—

Backstage in the exhibition hall’s prep room, the members of the Harlequin Troupe were getting ready for their next performance.

The Great Harlequin ushered Vane and his group into the reception room. After learning why they were there, the Great Harlequin looked troubled.

“To be honest, we haven’t seen the Laughing God in a long time either. He’s always been incredibly elusive. Even as a Great Harlequin, all I can do is passively wait for Him to contact us.”

“Looks like it’s a dead end. I guess I’ll just have to dig it up myself,” Vane said, looking completely disappointed.

“Is there really no way you can take the initiative to contact Him?” Eldrad asked, his tone urgent. If they can’t get in touch, this guy is actually going to tear down the Webway.

The Great Harlequin fell silent. After a long while, he finally spoke up again. “There is a way, but the price is extremely high.”

“What kind of way?” Vane instantly perked up.

“Performing the play Cegorach’s Revenge. That will definitely grab His attention,” the Great Harlequin’s expression grew solemn. “But the cost is that it will also draw the gaze of the Dark Prince. One wrong move, and it could summon demons, putting both the performers and the audience in extreme danger.”

“Is that it? What’s this ‘massive price’ you were talking about?” Vane asked, genuinely confused.

The Great Harlequin was stunned.

It could summon demons and endanger everyone present—is that not enough?!

“The cost is drawing in demons and threatening the lives of everyone here,” Eldrad quickly clarified.

“Oh, come on, how is that a price? We’ll just have Big E patrol the venue with his Custodes. If any demons show up, they can just beat the living crap out of them. We’ll be totally fine.”

Trajann: The majestic Emperor of the Imperium and the Captain-General of the Adeptus Custodes, reduced to theater security?!

The Great Harlequin looked at Vane and the group, weighing the options for quite a while before finally nodding. “Alright, we’ll trust you. We will perform Cegorach’s Revenge to draw the Laughing God’s attention.”

Every Harlequin Troupe had Cegorach’s Revenge in their repertoire. It told the story of the Fall of the Aeldari, where their gods were slaughtered or devoured by the Dark Prince, Slaanesh. Asuryan the Phoenix King, Khaine the God of War—they all make an appearance, only to be consumed.

Meanwhile, Cegorach, having barely escaped, formulates a series of plans. Enduring humiliation and biding his time, he ultimately achieves his vengeance. The entire performance is steeped in sorrow and the tragic grandeur of marching willingly toward death.

Under normal circumstances, a Troupe would never perform this play. Aside from the extreme difficulty and the large cast required, the most critical factor was that they needed a Solitaire to play the role of the Dark Prince.

Solitaires are members of the Troupe, but they spend the vast majority of their time wandering alone. They only return to the Troupe to perform during extremely important festivals or when guided by a divine revelation.

The souls of regular Harlequins are protected by the Laughing God, but Solitaires are entirely on their own. From the exact moment they take up the mantle, they are marked by Slaanesh. If they’re lucky, there’s a slim chance Cegorach might save their soul. If they’re unlucky, they just become a light snack for the Dark Prince.

—

“I didn’t hear the Dark Prince’s whispers this time.”

“Usually, whenever we perform a play involving the Dark Prince, we can feel a malicious gaze and hear creepy whispers. But this time… absolutely nothing.”

The members of the Dawn’s Hope Troupe chatted backstage after finishing their performance, leaving a passing Eldrad completely speechless.

Never mind the ‘Ancestor of Humanity’ who terrified the gods—even just factoring in the Emperor of the Imperium, the four Chaos Gods wouldn’t dare pull any petty tricks right in front of the Master of Mankind. Because if they did, he would literally drag them out and beat the living hell out of them.

Even if Slaanesh issued a direct order for demons to come crash the party, the demons probably wouldn’t even listen. That flaming sword in the Master of Mankind’s hand was basically an account-deletion tool. One slash, and there really was no ‘after’.

Without any demonic interference, the performance of Cegorach’s Revenge went off without a hitch. The Great Harlequin originally thought that just catching the Laughing God’s attention and receiving a divine oracle would make it a flawless show. However, the surprise was far bigger than he ever imagined.

After the show ended, the Harlequin who had played the Laughing God bowed to Vane and the Emperor.

“I am the God of Laughter of the Aeldari Pantheon. May I ask what business you two have with me?”

Hearing those words, the other Harlequins immediately bowed low, paying their absolute respects to the god they worshipped.

Vane looked at the Harlequin in front of him. He knew this wasn’t Cegorach’s true body, just a follower being possessed. But Vane couldn’t care less. As long as the guy could tell him where the Black Library was, it didn’t matter.

“I need the exact coordinates of the Black Library to see if there’s any data on the Ork Greenskins inside.”

The Black Library was nominally the legacy of the Aeldari, but it was actually left behind by the Old Ones. It was the absolute foundation for the Aeldari’s future resurgence.

Cegorach looked at Vane, rapidly weighing the pros and cons.

If he told them and helped them get inside, it would definitely strengthen the relationship between humanity and the Aeldari. The tradeoff was that the Black Library would no longer be exclusive to the Aeldari; humanity would definitely become frequent visitors.

If he refused to tell them, this guy would highly likely resort to… other methods.

“The Black Library does not have fixed coordinates. It possesses a will of its own and shifts locations periodically,” Cegorach said. “If you wish to enter and seek knowledge, I can guide you through the Webway and assist you in getting inside.”

—

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