Chapter 150 Big E Runs for Federal President

The extra-dimensional freak, Gilanbo, was absolutely dumbfounded.

How the hell did the human standing in front of him pack such ridiculous muscle mass? Was this guy even biologically possible in the real world?

Daigo stuck out two fingers and curled them in a classic “bring it” gesture. “Come and get it.”

Nobody takes that kind of disrespect lying down. Gilanbo let out a furious roar and charged.

“Wachaa!” Daigo belted out a battle cry, snapping a vicious kick forward.

The impact hit Gilanbo like a runaway semi-truck. The monster went flying through the air before violently crashing into the dirt.

“You’re so weak, I can’t even pretend to care.”

So this is why master acts so dramatically, Daigo realized. People loved to cringe at edge-lords and anime tropes, but honestly? In the real world, who didn’t want to completely style on an enemy and indulge their inner action hero after a totally one-sided beatdown?

“Human! I’ll tear you apart!” Gilanbo roared, its body swelling as it transformed into a towering kaiju.

“You think you’re the only one who can supersize?” Daigo whipped out his Sparklence. “Tiga!”

A blinding light erupted across the desert. It shot straight into the sky, forming a massive, earth-shattering pillar of light that rapidly condensed into the towering form of Ultraman Tiga.

But this wasn’t the Tiga anyone remembered. Even in his Multi Type form, he was absolutely shredded. His muscles bulged with roadmap veins, sporting an insanely exaggerated eight-pack that looked chiseled out of granite.

Master’s hellish training actually paid off. I’m terrifyingly strong right now. Daigo flexed his giant fists. One measly monster? Please. Bring me ten of them.

Gilanbo charged. Daigo didn’t even flinch—he simply grabbed the beast and sent it crashing into the dirt with a flawless judo throw. Seamlessly following up, he grabbed the horns on the monster’s head and the ridges on its waist, hoisted the massive kaiju high above his head, and launched it through the air.

Meanwhile, the GUTS team had tracked a bizarre electromagnetic signal to the area. They pulled up just in time to witness Tiga throwing down with the monster.

“Uh… did Tiga get a makeover?” Shinjo blinked.

“Look at his abs! He’s absolutely stacked!” Horii practically gaped.

“That’s just ridiculous.”

BOOM!

Tiga threw a punch that literally shattered the sound barrier, uppercutting Gilanbo right off its feet. As the monster slammed back down into the dirt, it was drowning in regret. If it had known this lunatic could turn into an Ultraman, it would have stayed fun-sized. Being giant just meant getting beaten up on a larger scale.

Screw this. Time to bail.

Gilanbo let out a screech, its physical body rippling as it tried to phase out of reality.

But Tiga was way faster. With a sharp grunt, he whipped out a blinding tether of light, completely stuffing the monster’s escape attempt and yanking it right back into the physical plane.

Crossing his arms into an ‘L’ shape, he fired off a quick-draw version of the Zeperion Ray. The beam punched clean through Gilanbo’s chest, obliterating the monster instantly.

Reverting to human form, Daigo jogged back over to his squad, completely shirtless.

The second Shinjo and Horii saw him, they started hooting like frat boys. They jogged over, aggressively poking and prodding at Daigo’s newly acquired physique.

“Dude, when the hell did you get so jacked?”

“This is unreal!”

Rena took one look at Daigo and immediately flushed bright red. If he’s that ridiculously strong, if we ever end up together… wouldn’t he totally destroy me?

—

Kumamoto City. The corporate headquarters of Cytech Corporation.

Standing on a high observation deck overlooking the Earth Defense Force’s private training grounds, Vane watched the newly selected recruits run through their drills.

Right after triggering the quest to hunt down the God of the Kyrieloids, Vane had immediately pitched the Earth Defense Force initiative. The plan was simple: scout a bunch of good-hearted, justice-driven kids, militarize them into a strike team of Ultramen, breach the alternate dimension, and put a bullet in the Kyrieloid deity.

If the Land of Light could have a Space Garrison, why the hell couldn’t Earth have one? Humanity was going to be the real sheriff in this sector of the universe.

“Traveler,” the Emperor said, stepping up beside Vane.

“What’s up?” Vane didn’t look away from the recruits.

“I’ve decided to run for President of the Earth Federation. Do I have your support?”

“Wait, what?” Vane whipped his head around, staring blankly at Big E. “You want to run for office?”

“Indeed. The Earth in this universe is constantly being harassed by xenos filth and extra-dimensional aberrations. It’s a complete circus, and I refuse to tolerate it for another second.” The Emperor clenched his massive fist. “That is why I am running for President. I am going to unite humanity and crusade our way across the stars.”

Vane just stared at him for a long moment, then slowly shifted his gaze to Keigo Masaki standing a few paces back.

Keigo immediately threw his hands up in defense. “Don’t look at me! This was entirely Lord Neoth’s idea! He just asked me to introduce him to the Globalists so he could get on the ballot!”

Even before the TPC had been established, the global economy and geopolitical landscape had been rapidly integrating. The groundwork for a unified global federation was already there. When the kaiju woke up, that slow integration slammed on the gas pedal. After weeks of frantic closed-door summits, the world’s nations had finally agreed to formally dissolve borders and establish the Earth Federation to put up a united front against alien threats.

And a unified planet needed a unified leader.

The current presidential race boiled down to candidates from five major political blocs. Keigo was a member of the Globalist Party, a faction heavily focused on centralizing resources, aggressive space expansion, and militarizing against extraterrestrial threats.

Vane stared at the Emperor, completely lost for words.

Right on cue, a blue window flashed into his vision.

[Quest: Campaign Manager for the God-Emperor. Help the Emperor secure the Earth Federation Presidency using strictly mortal methods.

The Earth is suffering relentless invasions by xenos filth and extra-dimensional horrors. This is an absolute insult to the dignity of Mankind.

Assist Neoth, the Master of Mankind, in taking the Oval Office of the Earth Federation. Enable him to consolidate planetary assets and launch a devastating counter-offensive against the enemies of humanity.

Rewards: Storm’s Tooth Bolter x1, Skill Book: Shadow Clone, Godzilla (Earth Form) Template, +1500 EMC Points, Campaign Progress +1%, Morphing Wand x1, Storm Wand x1, Mana Wand x1, Title: Puppet Master of the Shadow Government.]

Huh? Vane blinked, genuinely caught off guard. Are you kidding me? Big E can actually trigger system quests too?!

Bringing this absolute unit along for the ride was turning out to be the best decision he’d ever made. Honestly, if Big E took the presidency, Vane wouldn’t even have to micromanage him. He could just dump all the bureaucratic red tape for the Earth Defense Force on the guy’s desk. Plus, if they ever ran into some cosmic-level boss monster down the line, he had a pocket god ready to throw hands. The return on investment for this golden workhorse was astronomical.

Jackpot.

“Alright, fine. You’ve got my vote,” Vane said smoothly. “As of today, consider me your campaign manager. I’ll help you secure the ballot and take the Federation.”

“And this is your super PAC.”

With a flick of his wrist, Vane pulled the 100 solid gold blocks he’d hoarded from previous quest rewards and dropped them directly in front of the Emperor and Keigo.

Both men stared at the pile, completely dumbfounded.

A single Minecraft gold block weighed roughly nineteen metric tons. Factoring in the current global spot price of gold, Vane had just casually dropped around $250 billion dollars on the floor. If they flooded the market with this all at once, the global gold standard would literally collapse overnight.

“Is… is this not slightly overkill?” Keigo asked, dropping to his knees to run a shaking hand over the cold, flawless surface of one of the blocks.

“Not at all.” Vane waved it off. “If we’re doing this, we’re doing it right. Buying the presidency is just phase one. Funding a planetary space crusade isn’t going to be cheap.”

The Emperor looked at Vane, his eyes practically glistening with unspeakable emotion. Throughout all his millennia of conquest, he had never had a partner who backed him this hard. Honestly, he was half-tempted to shapeshift into a dark-skinned, long-legged, busty anime girl right then and there just to show his appreciation.

Bros look out for bros.

Vane caught the intensely weird look in the Emperor’s eyes and immediately felt a cold chill run down his spine.

“I’m warning you right now, do not try anything weird,” Vane deadpanned, pointing a finger at him. “Or I’m tossing your golden ass into a cage match with the four Chaos Gods.”

“My esteemed Traveler, my respect for you flows deeper than the greatest oceans. I would never betray such an unbreakable bond of brotherhood!”

“Just go run for president and save the brown-nosing. And remember the ground rules,” Vane warned, his tone dead serious. “We win this using human methods. Zero psychic mind-control. If I catch you using Warp magic to rig the polls, I’m pulling your funding.”

“Relax. With a war chest this deep, I could literally buy my way into office.” The Emperor gave a confident salute, scooped up Keigo, and marched off to start his campaign.

—

OR