Chapter 166: the things we never said

Chapter 166: The Things We Never Said

POV: Astrid Vale

The words still glowed above us, WE LOVE YOU, ASTRID burning bright against the darkness, and I couldn’t stop the tears tracking down my cheeks no matter how many times I tried to wipe them away.

Xander reached over gently, brushing one away with his thumb. "I want to say something," he said, "before the fireworks end."

I nodded, unable to form words yet, and he took a breath, something vulnerable settling over his usual easy confidence.

"I’ve loved you since the first day I saw you at Moonshade," he said. "Everyone else during orientation was trying to be noticed, trying to impress someone, find their place in the crowd. You were doing the opposite. You were trying to disappear."

I remembered that day vaguely, the overwhelming unfamiliarity of everything, how desperately I’d wanted to go unnoticed.

"Then you called me spoiled," he continued, laughing softly at the memory. "Nobody had ever spoken to me like that before. Not without fear, not without trying to impress me first. You just said it plainly, like you genuinely didn’t care who I was." He shook his head slightly. "You left an impression on me immediately. I didn’t understand what it was at first. I just knew I kept looking for you afterward."

My throat tightened further as he continued, his voice softening into something more serious.

"Then came the jealousy, the teasing, the arguments, the bond, and eventually, love," he said. "When you disappeared, and the bond went silent, I thought I was going to lose my mind entirely. I don’t want our lives defined by that fear anymore. I want more memories with you. More ridiculous dates. More arguments. More mornings waking up beside you. More nights like this one. More ordinary things that become ours simply because we’re together."

He paused, his eyes holding mine steadily. "I love you, Astrid. I think I’ve loved you for longer than I even knew what to call it."

My tears finally spilled over completely, and I reached for him instinctively, though Reed’s voice stopped me before I could fully close the distance.

"There’s something I need to say too," he said, and something in his tone, quieter and heavier than Xander’s warmth, made me turn toward him fully.

"I remember the exact moment I realized you weren’t someone I could simply walk away from," Reed said. "I loved watching you fight for yourself even when you thought nobody was watching. But loving you terrified me, because wanting someone doesn’t give me the right to possess them." His jaw tightened slightly. "I’ve spent so much time controlling myself, Astrid, because you were never something I wanted to own. You were someone I wanted to choose me."

His expression darkened further as he continued. "When you were taken, something inside me broke. I hated every moment I couldn’t reach you. I hated the helplessness, knowing someone else had you while I couldn’t protect you at all." He paused, his hand tightening slightly around mine. "There’s a part of me that will always be ruthless about keeping you safe. But I will never confuse protection with ownership. If you choose me, I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure you never regret that choice."

He held my gaze steadily, something raw and honest in his eyes that I’d rarely seen from him before. "I don’t want a life where you’re merely safe," he said. "I want a life where you’re free to choose me every morning, and somehow, you still do."

I was crying openly now, unable to stop the tears streaming down my face, and I found I had no grand speech prepared in return, nothing that could properly match the weight of everything they’d just given me.

"I don’t know what I did to deserve this," I managed finally, my voice breaking around the words.

"You don’t have to deserve it," Xander said immediately.

"You only have to accept it," Reed added quietly.

I reached for both of them, my hands finding theirs, and something settled completely in my chest, every fear and hesitation I’d carried about this bond, about choosing them both, finally dissolving into something simple and certain.

Xander kissed me first, soft and achingly tender, nothing rushed about it at all. I kissed him back through my tears, tasting salt mixed with something sweeter underneath, and when he finally pulled back, Reed was there immediately, his lips finding mine with the same gentle intensity.

The fireworks continued exploding overhead, color spilling across the sky in brilliant bursts, and the three of us sank slowly onto the grass together, the city glowing softly below us in the distance. There were kisses between all three of us, laughter threading through tears that kept falling even as new ones replaced them, Reed’s hand finding my cheek, Xander’s fingers tangling gently through my hair.

For the first time since Elaris, I wasn’t thinking about the kidnapping, the investigation, the mystery of my own heritage, or whatever uncertain danger might still be waiting somewhere out there. I wasn’t thinking about tomorrow at all.

I was simply happy, surrounded by two people who’d just handed me their hearts completely, unguarded and honest in a way neither of them typically allowed themselves to be.

Xander’s lips stayed against mine, warm and insistent, and beside us, Reed’s hand slipped gently around my waist, settling beneath the edge of my dress, pulling me closer against him. My breath caught at the contact, something electric passing through me as both their presences surrounded me entirely, the fireworks still painting brilliant colors across the sky above our heads.

The city lights glowed softly in the distance, and the three of us stayed there on that hill for a long while, wrapped together beneath the night sky, the words they’d written in fire still fading slowly overhead, long after they’d already said everything those words had promised with their own voices instead.

Reed’s fingers finally found the wet and pulsing spot between my legs.