Chapter 110: Sudden Proposal

"I want you to marry me..."

Neo’s mind went blank at her sudden declaration, as she stated that demand as if she was asking him to buy a cake for her.

"Pardon?..."

Nora remained silent as she looked at him, meeting his gaze. This time she kept her gaze steady, looking at him as if she had already made up her mind.

Neo’s eyes widened in surprise and shock, not knowing what to say, or what could even be said. Her words had fallen so unexpectedly that they startled him to the very core.

He didn’t know where the marriage had come from. The last time they’d had this conversation was at a ball, where Neo had explained that he had declared his wish to marry her on his fifth birthday because he didn’t want to fall into the trap of the second empress.

’What is she even saying? Did someone manipulate her? Or does she think that if she doesn’t marry me, she might lose me again?’

There was no way for Neo to know what must have been going on inside her mind. But he couldn’t sit still and accept whatever she wanted just on the basis of her request.

He straightened his back on the chair and looked at her carefully, trying to find even a small crack in her expression that might tell him the reason behind such a sudden demand. However, her face remained the same as before, calm and composed, without the slightest sign of embarrassment, as if she had not just said something that could turn the whole mansion upside down.

"Nora, wait a moment. I think I should ask you something first. Why do you suddenly want to marry me? Did something happen while I was away? If someone said something to you, or you’re not feeling okay, then tell me right now."

Nora read the movement of his lips and shook her head slowly, her violet eyes never leaving his face.

She picked up the pen from the table and pulled the diary toward herself, writing a few lines in her neat handwriting before pushing it in front of him. Neo lowered his gaze to the page, and his brows furrowed as he read it.

[No one said anything to me, and no one forced me. This is my own decision, and I made it a long time ago. You declared it yourself on your fifth birthday, so I am only asking you to keep your word.]

Neo let out a helpless breath, as he felt that she had struck at the exact place where he could not argue back. It was true that he had said those words in front of everyone, but at that time, it was only a shield for him, a way to avoid being tied to someone he did not want, and he had never imagined that Nora would take it so seriously, or that she would hold on to it for all these years.

’I did say it... but I said it as a child, in order to escape that situation. I never thought she would remember it so clearly, or that she would use it against me like this.’

He rubbed his forehead with his fingers and wrote back after thinking for a while.

[I do remember what I said, and I won’t deny it. But we were only children then, and I said it for a reason which had nothing to do with your feelings. Marriage is not something we can decide in a single moment inside a library. It involves our families, our status, and the whole nobility, not to mention that we haven’t even seen each other for months. Don’t you think we should take more time before deciding something so important?]

Nora read the lines silently, her eyes moving from left to right without any change in her expression. When she finished, she tapped the pen once against the table, thought for a moment, and began to write again.

[I have waited ten months, and I have waited many years before that. I do not think I need more time. If you are worried about your family, then I will talk to them myself, and I know they will happily accept it. If you are worried about the nobility, then I do not care what they think. The only thing I need is your answer.]

Neo stared at the words for a long time. Her sentences were simple and direct, yet each of them carried a weight that pressed down on his chest. There was no hesitation in them, no shyness that a girl of her age should have shown while talking about marriage, and he realised with a slight chill that she was not asking him for a favour. She was telling him her decision and only waiting for him to accept it.

’This is bad. If I refuse her directly, I don’t know what she will do, and if I accept just to calm her down, then I will be tying myself to a promise I haven’t even thought about. But what is it that she is truly hiding behind this request?’

He glanced at her again, and this time he noticed something he had missed before. Her fingers, which were holding the pen, were pressed so tightly against it that the knuckles had turned slightly pale, as if she was holding on to something that would slip away if she loosened her grip even a little. It was a tiny detail, but it was enough for him to understand that the calm face in front of him was only a mask, and that beneath it she was far more nervous than she wanted him to know.

His expression softened a little as he picked up the pen once more.

[Nora, I am not refusing you, and I am not saying that I don’t want to be with you. I only want to understand why it has to be marriage, and why it has to be now. Are you afraid that I will leave again? Is that the reason?]

When he pushed the diary toward her, he saw her hand freeze for a moment as her eyes moved across the question. Her lips pressed together into a thin line, and for the first time since the conversation began, she lowered her gaze and avoided his eyes. Neo held his breath, knowing that he had touched something real, and waited patiently without saying anything more.

After a long silence, she began to write, much slower than before, and when she pushed the diary back, her handwriting looked slightly less steady than it had been in the earlier lines.

[Yes. I am afraid. I do not want to lose you again, and I do not want to spend another day wondering whether you will come back. If we are married, then no one can take you away from me, and you will never have to leave. That is the only reason I need.]

Neo read the words once, and his heart sank, because beneath the plain sentences he could feel the weight of the time she had spent alone, waiting in this very library day after day, with nothing but books and silence for company. He had been so focused on his own guilt that he had never truly thought about how much she must have suffered in his absence.

’So that’s why... She isn’t acting out of some strange plan. She is simply afraid, and she doesn’t know any other way to keep me by her side.’

He felt a deep ache in his chest as he looked at her figure, sitting so straight and composed on the chair, trying so hard to hide the fear inside her. He wanted to reach out and hold her hand, to tell her that he would never go anywhere again, but he knew that a promise made in a hurry would not be enough to calm someone who had been hurt so deeply.

He picked up the pen and wrote slowly, taking care with every word.

[I understand now, and I am sorry that I made you feel this way. But marriage is not something we should decide out of fear. If we do it, I want it to be because we both want it, and not because we are afraid of losing each other. I promise you that I won’t leave you again without telling you, no matter what happens. Will you trust me on that for now?]

He pushed the diary to her and waited, watching her face with a nervous heart. Nora read the message slowly, her gaze lingering on the last line far longer than on the rest, and her fingers tightened on the edge of the page once again.

For a long moment, she did not respond at all, and the quiet of the library seemed to grow heavier around them. Neo could hear nothing but the faint rustle of paper as she turned the diary slightly in her hands, as if she was weighing every word he had written against the ten months of loneliness behind her.

Finally, she lifted her eyes and looked straight at him, her violet eyes shining with a depth that Neo could not fully understand. Then she picked up the pen again and wrote a single line, pushing it toward him with a hand that was steadier than before.

[Then I will wait, but only for a little while. After that, I will not ask again, and I will not let you refuse.]

Neo read the sentence, and a faint, helpless smile appeared on his lips. It was not exactly the answer he had hoped for, but it was far better than being turned away, and he knew that for now, this was the most he could ask for.

’A little while, huh... Why do I feel like I just signed a contract that I can never escape from?’

He looked at the girl in front of him, who had already lowered her eyes and returned to her book as if nothing had happened, and he let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head in disbelief.

Whatever she was hiding, whatever she was planning behind that calm face, he decided that he would find out sooner or later. And until then, he would stay by her side, just as he had promised.

***

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