Re: Blood and Iron - Chapter 943: The Death of Happiness

Chapter 943: The Death of Happiness

Karl Franz von Zehntner had recently graduated from the Royal Tyrolean Main Cadet Institute and been commissioned as a junior officer of the Heer. But today he was not at the barracks, today he was at home.

He sat casually, but rigidly. Years of drilling at the institute had made him proper in a way that was rare even for nobility.

Claire stood not far away. Looking down at the young man who was dressed so much less formally than she was accustomed to. She sighed and shook her head, a bag packed in her hands.

A trunk, really, it was the total amount of belongings she had since the day she first came to Innsbruck to study. Though she had graduated the previous year.

She had managed to convince her family to let her stay in Germany for a while longer while attending university.

During this time, the von Zehntners had been generous enough to allow her to stay on their estate as a guest.

But… recent matters at home had summoned her back to Orleans where her family resided now in privilege and proximity to the royal family.

She wanted to say something… but perhaps it was for the best that she didn’t. Maria and Theresa were waiting for her at the front gates. They had prepared a car to take her to the station, and they wanted to see her off to France personally.

But she had not yet said her goodbyes to Karl, whom over the last year she had grown quite fond of. More than fond, really… Even so, it wasn’t meant to be.

She was just about to take a step towards the door when Karl looked down from his book, and saw her standing there with a trunk in her hand.

A look of understanding came over him instantly, and he smiled bitterly as he nodded his head with a heavy sigh.

“And here I thought you would be staying with us throughout the remainder of your years at university.”

He placed his book down, not even caring to mark the exact page he was on, and stood up. Approaching the young woman where he offered her his hand in friendship.

“Your family has called for you, haven’t they? I suppose this is farewell for now?”

Claire stared at Karl’s hand longer than necessary. She didn’t move towards accepting his gesture, she simply looked at it almost as if the world had stood still as she struggled to make a decision.

She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t say good-bye like this, she dropped her trunk ,and surprised the man as she hugged him tightly.

“Karl… I really shouldn’t say this… But I no longer have the time…. I really like you, and I know your sisters would kill me if they knew how I felt, but I don’t want this to be good-bye! I want to stay here with you, your family, and your sisters!”

Karl did not immediately shy away from Claire’s embrace, he held her in his arms as she sobbed in his shoulder. He could see his own expression glinting off the window behind her.

His face was stoic, but his eyes contained a hint of grief and sorrow. One which he struggled not to carry in his voice as he gently removed Claire from his arms.

“Claire… I’m struggling to find the words for the affection I feel for you….”

He paused for a second to collect his thoughts before continuing.

“I like you, probably every bit as much as you like me. And I have often thought that if we were to marry, I could even grow to love you more than life itself….”

There was a small flicker of hope in Claire’s eyes as she locked hers with Karl’s, but he didn’t let it breathe into life. He snuffed it out the very next second with his words.

“But… I cannot marry you.”

The cascade of emotions that Claire just felt was like a roller coaster leading straight into a concrete wall.

She looked her head away with shame, but Karl didn’t let her escape his gaze, grabbing her chin with a single finger he tilted it back to him.

“It’s not for the reasons you think… But I already know what is expected of me. Even if they haven’t said it openly. I am to marry Princess Isabelle de Orleans when she comes of age. What I owe to my house is greater than what I feel. You understand this… don’t you? Is that not why you’re returning to France?”

The weight of the words felt like they weighed more than the entire world as they settled over her.

She knew he was right; she hated it with every fiber of her being. But Claire knew that Karl was right. They were simply not meant to be… He let go of her chin and allowed her to breathe, to accept the finality.

And when she had regained her proper hue, he kissed her on the cheek and hugged her one last time.

“You have my love, and my answer… Now go, your train awaits.”

Claire did not look back. Cruel as it may be, Karl was right, their lives were ephemeral, and their individual happiness was secondary to the needs of their families.

She had learned their world well enough to understand it. Just not well enough to belong to it.

For perhaps if it were her house that had become the new Kings of France, then it would be she that Karl married.

Karl watched Claire leave the room and sighed heavily as he shook his head. He sat back down and picked up his book. Staring at the words written, but not reading them.

His heart felt like it had imploded and left a giant black hole where it had once been. How could he possibly return to the joy he felt just moments ago when reading the Chapter?

Duty… to family… to folk… to fatherland. He understood now what that truly entailed.

For the first time, he understood his grandfather. Not as a statesman, nor as a figure of history, but as a man. And he wondered quietly how many times Bruno von Zehntner had made the same choice.