Chapter 234 B4. 21.3 – Return to Barstow

Amber Deen Leska

Amber Deen wasn’t sure if she should’ve asked this question, but it had been bothering her since they killed the frat boys. She thought she’d be kept awake each night by the guilt of feeding humans to an Adumbrae. But no. She became worried about something else—it resurfaced when Erind suggested she’d transform into Blanchette and eat the PCM man from the Otay commune.

“Yeah, I ate the frat boys,” Erind said. “Parts of them. Specifically, their heads.”

“Not too loud,” said Deen, making sure she sounded stern.

She didn’t care about the volume of Erind’s voice; there was no one to overhear them. But Deen had to pretend everything was normal. Given their connection, Deen was worried that Erind would realize she was starting to suspect something was amiss.

“Yes, Mom,” Erind said, sounding like a whiny teenager.

It was their inside joke. Regular banter. Deen gave one of the standard responses—rolling her eyes. Erind’s acting normal after telling a lie made Deen worry more.

I don’t think you ate the frat boys, Deen thought, listening to Erind list all the food she wanted to try in the food court.

Deen remembered that Erind was covered in blood after they had killed the frat boys. Erind didn’t turn into Blanchette; she wouldn’t have a spot of blood on her original body if she did. Deen also asked Yves if he saw any transformation. He didn’t.

Erind killed the frat boys as herself… and ate their heads. Or so she claimed.

There was no blood around Erind’s mouth, which she should’ve had if she truly ate them. It was a logical conclusion, wasn’t it? Deen wouldn’t believe if Erind explained that she wiped her mouth after every bite she took. Why didn’t Erind care to clean the rest of her body until later? There was even blood on her hair.

While they discussed how to hide the bodies of the frat boys, Erind also offered to turn into Blanchette and consume everything. Blanchette had a bigger mouth—this would’ve been a believable justification. But it didn’t explain why Erind had to lie that she had eaten the frat boys’ heads.  

I won’t confront her, Deen thought. Not this time, or Erind would be on the defensive. Deen needed to first find out why Erind lied.

Was it the Adumbrae controlling Erind? Wouldn’t the Adumbrae want to eat brains?

Maybe Erind’s troubled mind, affected by her struggle against the Adumbrae, had gone crazy. Deen didn’t actually think so—Erind was thinking quite clearly back then. She even staged the scene to look like she had eaten the frat boys, probably crushing their heads into an unrecognizable mess or burying them somewhere. Even now, Erind didn’t seem crazy.

Did Erind… just want to kill?

Deen was also angry at the frat boys, but she didn’t want to do anything that drastic. If it were up to her, she would’ve injured them at most. She didn’t have the right to judge their ultimate fates. But to protect Erind’s Adumbrae secret, Deen had to kill them.

“I’m not sure if I’ll buy food now,” Erind said. “Too early for dinner. Do you know what’s the difference between dinner and supper?”

“Wha-what?” Deen blinked, snapping out of her thoughts. “Both terms refer to the evening meal, if that’s what you’re asking. In the past, dinner was the heavy midday meal, and supper is the light evening meal.”

Deen couldn’t bring herself to like Erind’s tangents now that she confirmed Erind’s lie. Erind might be doing this to pretend nothing was wrong with her. What was wrong with Erind?  

“Wait, wait. So, dinner used to be around noon?” Erind asked. “Why did it move to evening then?”

Erind’s face was full of curiosity. Did she genuinely want an answer, or was this another act? Deen didn’t know what to trust anymore.

“Industrialization happened,” Deen nonchalantly replied while scanning Erind’s face and neck for discolored skin. No progress on the seeding. “When most of society were farmers, people returned home to have a large meal when the sun was at its highest. Replenish the energy used in the morning and fuel for afternoon’s work.”

“Ah, I get it. People moved to factories and couldn’t come home for lunch. Well, dinner. So, dinner became the evening meal when people returned from a long day at work. What did lunch used to be?”

“A small meal while taking a break from work. It wasn’t called lunch then, of course.”

“Wow, you really know a lot of stuff,” Erind said. “You even knew about Salton Sea… which is a lake.”

Deen smiled through the worry coating her heart. She used to be equal parts annoyed and amused when Erind asked about the difference between an ocean and a sea. Now, she couldn’t stop the overthinking. Was this an act, too? Who was the real Erind?

“A friend of Dad had a project there,” Deen said. “It was decades before I was born, so I don’t know much about it. I haven’t even been to Salton Sea. Recently, there had been plans to try reviving the area. But I don’t think it’d work out.”

“Pretty cool,” Erind said. “What’s up with that place anyway?”

Deen told the story of Salton Sea—it was an accidental lake made from the waters rushing out of a ruptured irrigation canal into a natural basin. As she narrated the area’s development and eventual fall, Deen reminded herself there was a real Erind before these changes. Deen should strive to return the Erind before the subway Adumbrae attack.

She was the only one who could save her best friend.

Erind’s violent aspect wasn’t the Adumbrae inside her trying to surface. Deen was confident of her conclusion because Erind didn’t eat the frat boys. All the instances of Erind devouring a person or monster that Deen was aware of always involved Blanchette.

The real Erind had been twisted by trauma. To cope with the danger from all sides, Erind pushed herself to be aggressive. Violent. It was a very normal defense mechanism.

Undoing this change… Was it possible? What if Deen reversed her approach? Instead of being a nag—Deen knew she came off as one—she’d fully support Erind with her plans. Often, she was so fixated on being right that she wouldn’t care if it hurt or pushed away others. Admitting this to herself was a significant step toward change.

Deen would show Erind that she had someone always on her side. Drive away the violence in Erind’s heart with kindness and assurance. The first step in this new strategy was agreeing with Erind to leave Cecilia in her lab. Deen had much to say earlier, but kept her mouth shut.

“I wish we had gone to Salton Sea,” Erind said. “But I guess it was really too dangerous.”

Deen nodded. “It would’ve been a great movie setting.” Erind’s eyes lighting up proved that Deen said the right thing. “We can go there after this is all over.”

“When would that be?”

“It’ll come.” Deen wanted to hold Erind’s hands, but she had hidden them under the table. Deen chose to tap Erind’s foot with hers. She had also touched foreheads with Erind earlier. She lightly pushed against Erind’s hatred of physical contact, believing this was the key to coaxing Erind to open up. “As I always say, what’s important is we’re together,” Deen added.

Erind made a face. “Don’t make it sound like we’re on a date.”

“You wish you’ll ever have a date with me,” Deen said with a chuckle.

Was Erind’s bloodthirsty side hiding behind their friendly banter? Had Erind ever thought of attacking Deen during their disagreements? Probably not because Gabe would’ve warned Deen.

Erind gestured at Deen and herself. “Isn’t this a date? Does food need to be present for this to be considered one?”

“There are movie dates. Couples can also go skiing, skydiving—”

“Have you gone skydiving on a date before?”

“No, no,” Deen said, laughing a bit forcefully. She hoped she could relax around Erind again. “I’m afraid of heights. Since we’re here, we should order food. It’ll be a sad date if we just stare at an empty table.” Food could calm Erind.

“But I don’t want to eat yet.”

“What do you want to do?”

“Um… What if we check what happened to the frat boys? Do you think they’ve been found?”

“It should’ve been on the news if they were,” Deen carefully replied.

“We can drive there,” Erind suggested.

“It’s far away.” Deen had planned not to contradict Erind, but she was already shooting down her plan. Deen didn’t give her own reason not to go there. She’d have to package her suggestions for Erind’s benefit. “Don’t you want to rest, Erind? We’ve just gotten here. Let’s have an early dinner.”

Erind grinned. “You just don’t want to visit the crime scene. I’m onto you…”

“What are you talking about? I’m a bit tired of driving.”

“Oh, sorry about that, Deen. Yeah, the round trip will be around a couple of hours. Before I buy food, is there anything else you want to ask me?”

“When will you become taller?” Deen asked with an impish wink.

They laughed together. Deen could say it was genuine on her part.  

Deen didn’t ask about the missing woman the Corebrings were looking for. She couldn’t shake the feeling that Erind was involved somehow. Erind has many secrets. Deen couldn’t change that—her choices were either to leave or stay.

And Deen chose to stay. She wouldn’t abandon her best friend.

If Erind became more violent in the future, Deen would still stay. She’d help Erind to hide bodies if need be.

“Maybe I’ll get taller if I eat more,” Erind said. “Let’s go buy something.”

Deen was half-standing when Gabe’s voice spoke.

[Return to Cecilia.]

“Erind, we should return to the lab,” Deen said, her tone serious. “Gabe’s warning me.”

“Incoming danger?” Erind asked. “Who could it be? The BID or Euphonia?”

“Whoever it is, they know who we are and where we are,” Deen said as they briskly walked out of the train car. “I can’t think of any reason for BID agents or Euphonia’s subordinates to visit Barstow Station specifically.”

“They know our identities? That’s like big-time trouble! I should’ve packed more clothes. I didn’t expect we’d be on the run!”

“Calm down,” Deen said, scrolling through Snippet on her phone. “So far, no wanted posters with our faces. We’ll find out how bad the situation is later. Our priority is evacuating with Cecilia before the—”

[Don’t leave Barstow Station.]

Deen froze. Did Gabe just converse with her? Gabe never answered her questions before. This wasn’t exactly an answer, but Gabe’s instruction was directly related to what she was saying. Also, Gabe warned her a few minutes before they would’ve left the building. Why so early?

“What is it?” Erind asked. “More instructions?”  

“We shouldn’t leave Barstow Station.”

“Huh? I don’t get it. Maybe it’s Cecilia who’s in trouble, and we should save—wait. Gabe wouldn’t care about her.”

“If Cecilia’s betraying us, priming the bombs in her lab, Gabe would’ve warned us differently. I think there’s danger. We’ll hide in Cecilia’s lab to let it pass.”

“It’ll be great if we can avoid a fight,” Erind said, veering towards the souvenir stalls. “But just in case…”

“What do you think you’re doing?” Deen covered her mouth. Her harsh tone had already slipped out, but Erind didn’t seem to care. Erind had returned to the store selling the Red Hood mask.

“Do you have a Red Hood outfit?” Erind asked the shopkeeper. “I know Halloween’s far and all, but it’s for cosplay.”

“Sure, I got some set,” replied the man. “What size are you?”

“Oh, it isn’t for me. It’s for my friend over here.”

Deen wanted to scold Erind. She devoted her willpower to change course. “Yes, my size. Can you please hurry? We have to leave soon.”

“This here is what I got,” said the shopkeeper. “Complete with everything, from the red hoodie with ears and the clawed hands. Fifty bucks.”

A vein near Deen’s temple throbbed as she restrained her complaints. She slapped a hundred-dollar bill on the counter—she didn’t have anything smaller; she left her cards in Vegas—and took the costume pack.

“You’re not going to wait for your change?” Erind asked, hurrying after her.

“We don’t have time.”

[Walk normally.]

Deen immediately slowed. Erind bumped into her back. “Act normal,” Deen hissed before Erind could ask a question.

Deen eyed the people they passed. There was a family, a trio of truckers, and several others. One or more of them were connected to the danger. Deen was sure she had seen some of them earlier, when entering the building.

Was the danger here all along? This couldn’t be an ambush. No one knew their group would come; they didn’t even plan to until the last-minute change of plans. The danger had been waiting for them for some time but didn’t know who they were. Gabe couldn’t warn them when they arrived in Barstow because the danger wasn’t within his future view yet.

What was the danger? Leaving Barstow Station would trigger it—Gabe’s earlier warning was also a clue. This was the first time he explained his instructions. An explanation in some fashion.

“None of those people were BID agents,” Erind whispered, following Deen through the historical exhibit, which was fortunately empty. “They didn’t react to you.”

“Maybe they were normal humans employed by the BID,” Deen replied. “Rank and file. I can’t imagine an agent staking this place for days. I also expect the BID would’ve already discovered Cecilia laboratory.”

“There are eyes on the parking lot, if we’re not supposed to leave.”

“I agree. However, it’s not feasible for our enemy to track the dozens or even hundreds of vehicles passing through Barstow Station each day. Something triggered their alarm.”

“Our arrival,” Erind said. “Cecilia is supposed to know the answer.”

“All clear,” Deen said.

Erind nodded and inserted the key into the hidden slot on the wall. The door to Cecilia’s lab hissed open.