Chapter 144 - 0144: Bend Over (r18+)

Chapter 144: Chapter 0144: Bend Over (r18+)

The room sat suffocatingly quiet, heavy with the weight of years of unspoken tension and the sharp, metallic tang of raw adrenaline. Even the shadows seemed to hold their breath, waiting for whatever came next. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I registered the ticking of a clock, absurdly steady against the chaos unraveling inside me.

For a second, Jaxx didn’t move. He just stood there, towering over me in the low light, his gaze roaming over my face, my body, like he was memorizing every inch of me. Like he was calculating the exact moment to tear down whatever fragile composure I had left.

I wondered, in that suspended heartbeat, whether he could see straight through me, past the careful mask I’d worn for three long years, to the woman underneath who had almost forgotten how to want anything for herself. It occurred to me then that I had spent so long being careful, being quiet, that I no longer knew what it felt like to be seen this completely, and the realization terrified me almost as much as it thrilled me.

I could feel the weight of his silence pressing against my chest, thick and suffocating, as if the air itself waited for him to decide something. My mind raced back through every choice that had led me to this room, this moment, this man, and still, I couldn’t bring myself to regret a single one of them.

Every sacrifice, every quiet humiliation I’d swallowed to get here, suddenly felt like the price of admission to something I’d been denying myself for far too long.

I thought of all the nights I’d lain awake beside a man who couldn’t see me, and how strange it felt now to stand in front of someone who looked at me like I was the only thing in the room worth seeing.

"Are you sure that’s what you want?" His voice came as a growl, low and dangerous, scraping against the silence like he was holding back something feral. "You walk away right now, Elena, and you walk away clean. But you stay? You don’t get a reset button."

I nodded, my throat tight, my skin burning under the weight of his attention. My hand rose between us, trembling just enough to betray the absolute chaos inside me. I showed him my ring finger.

Bare. No silver. No diamond. No chain. No shackle.

"I’m done with him," I whispered, my voice breaking just enough to let the raw, jagged edges of my pain slip through. "Everything about him. His rules, his name, his fucking shadow. He spent three years trying to make me quiet, Jaxx. I’m sick of being quiet."

Something dark, ancient, and possessive flickered in the depths of his eyes. He studied me for a long moment, as if searching for a single trace of doubt he could use to send me running. He found none. Whatever he saw instead seemed to settle something in him, some last hesitation finally giving way. I watched the change happen in real time, the subtle loosening of his shoulders, the way his jaw unclenched, as though my certainty had finally given him permission to want me back.

"You walk through that door, Elena, there’s no turning back," he said, his voice low, final, vibrating right into the center of my chest. "You don’t get to go running back when the dust settles, crying about what you lost."

"I don’t want to go back," I said, stepping closer until the heat off his chest washed over me, thick and intoxicating. "I want you, Jaxx."

The words tumbled out of me, raw and unfiltered, like a secret I’d been choking on for years. My heart hammered against my ribs, my skin burning under his touch, under the truth of what I’d just admitted.

Some small, distant part of me marveled at how easily the confession had come, after years of swallowing it whole. It felt like setting down a weight I hadn’t realized I’d been carrying, one that had bent my spine and stolen my breath for far too long. For the first time in longer than I could remember, I felt something close to lightness, terrifying and exhilarating all at once.

I almost laughed at the absurdity of it, how three words could undo three years of careful silence, but the sound caught in my throat, swallowed by the intensity of his stare.

"Say it again." Jaxx’s voice came out rasped, his hand shooting out to grip my jaw, his thumb digging into the soft flesh of my cheek, tilting my face up until I had nowhere else to look. "Say it so I know you aren’t just looking for an anchor in a storm. Say it so I know you aren’t using me to get even."

"I want you," I breathed against his thumb, my lips brushing his skin, feeling the coarse texture of his calluses. "Only you. I’ve wanted you since the first night you looked at me like you wanted to tear me apart."

"Good," he growled, and something in his expression cracked open, just for an instant, revealing a hunger he’d clearly kept caged for far too long. "Because I’m done pretending."

And then... he moved.

His mouth crashed into mine like a storm,,, hard, demanding, unrelenting. Teeth clashed. Tongues collided. Pure dominance poured from him, filling the space between us, consuming me, drowning me in the heat of his need.

I moaned into the kiss, my hands fisting in his shirt, clawing at the heavy fabric, pulling him closer like he was the only thing keeping me grounded, the only thing keeping me from shattering into a thousand pieces.

Every nerve in my body seemed to wake at once, screaming for more of him, more of this reckless unraveling I’d denied myself for far too long. Years of careful restraint dissolved in seconds, replaced by something wild and unnamed that I didn’t recognize in myself. I barely recognized the woman clawing at him now, desperate and unashamed, but I welcomed her anyway, grateful to finally let her out. She felt like someone I’d buried a long time ago, someone I hadn’t realized I missed until this very moment.

He growled against my lips, his hands sliding down to grip my waist, digging into my hips to pull me flush against him. I could feel the hard, unyielding line of his body pressed against my stomach, heavy and rigid through his dark denim, promising everything I’d been craving and fearing in equal measure.

"You’re mine, Elena," he rasped against my mouth, his breath hot, tasting of whiskey and bitter need. "You brought this on yourself. You walked into my house, into my space, and stripped that ring off."

"Then don’t stop," I whimpered, arching up to meet the press of his body. "Don’t you dare stop."

His fingers moved to the zipper of my dress, dragging it down slowly, deliberately, the metallic sound echoing in the silence like a key turning in a lock. The cool air hit my bare back, making me shiver violently, but his fingers followed right behind, rough and hot, tracing the curve of my spine, teasing, taunting, driving me completely out of my mind.

Each brush of his fingertips felt like a question and an answer at once, stripping away not just fabric but every last defense I had left. The dress pooled around my waist, leaving the thin black lace of my corset and panties exposed to the dim light of the room. I felt more exposed than I’d ever been, not just in body but in every fractured piece of myself I’d spent years hiding.

There was something almost unbearable about being seen like this, and yet I couldn’t bring myself to look away from the hunger in his eyes. It struck me, in that moment, that vulnerability could feel like power too, depending on whose hands you placed it in.

He pulled back just enough to look at me, his breath coming in ragged hitches, his dark eyes locked on mine. "Look at me," he ordered, quiet but absolute.

I opened my eyes, gasping for air, my pulse thumping in my throat. "Jaxx, please..."

"Say who you came here for," he interrupted, his voice cutting through my plea like a whip. "Say his name out loud so it dies right here."

"I came for you," I gasped, my chest heaving, my heart pounding in my throat. "Only you, Jaxx."

A dark smirk curled his lips before he pulled me close again, his hands sliding down to grip my hips, claiming every inch of space between us. There was something almost reverent in the way he held me now, as though he understood exactly what it had cost me to say those words.

"Good girl," he murmured, his mouth trailing down my jawline, dragging fire across my skin before his teeth grazed the pulse point at my neck, biting down just hard enough to draw a sharp whimper from my lips. "Now let me hear what else you’ve been keeping inside."

His hands moved up, slipping beneath the loosened lace of my bra, his large, calloused palms cupping my breasts, squeezing them until a broken sound tore from my throat. His thumbs rolled over my swollen nipples, flicking the peak of each crest again and again until heat rushed straight down to my thighs.

I arched into his hands, completely helpless to the surge of heat crashing through me, my mind emptying of every thought except him, his hands, his mouth, the relentless pulse of wanting.

"You’re shaking, Bambina," he whispered, his hot breath fanning across my wet skin as his hand slid lower, slipping beneath the narrow elastic band of my silk panties, his fingers finding the soaked heat of my center.

"Because of you," I choked out, my hands tangling in his dark hair, pulling him down, desperate for the friction. "You’re doing this."

"I’m just getting started," he purred, his long fingers slicking through my folds, spreading the moisture before finding my clit and circling it with relentless, torturous precision.

I gasped, my head falling back against his shoulder as he pushed one long finger deep inside me, stretching me, taking space that belonged only to him now. My walls clamped down hard around him, slick and pulsing.

"Fuck, Elena," he swore, his forehead pressing to mine as his finger worked inside me, establishing a slow, brutal rhythm while his thumb kept up the torture on my clit. "You’re soaking for me. Look at what I do to you."

"Jaxx, please... I need..." My knees buckled under the weight of the friction, the sheer sensation dragging me under, but he caught me, his arm wrapping around my waist like a steel band to keep me upright.

"Don’t fall down yet," he murmured against my ear, his fingers driving faster inside me, dipping deeper, working a second finger in until I screamed his name into the empty room. "Look at me while I take you."

"Jaxx, please, no more talking..."

"Bend over," he commanded, his voice dropping an octave into a low, uncompromising growl, stripping away the last remaining threads of control. "Grab the table, Elena."

He spun me around before I could even process the command, pushing my chest down against the cool mahogany of the desk. My hands scrambled for purchase against the slick wood, my hips raised, exposed, vulnerable, entirely at his mercy. He hooked his fingers into the band of my panties, but didn’t remove it. He was teasing me, drawing out every second until my whole body trembled with anticipation.

My pulse roared in my ears, drowning out everything except the sound of his heavy breath, the rustle of his belt buckle unclasping, and the thundering need coursing through my veins. Somewhere beneath the haze of want, a small, defiant voice whispered that I had never felt more certain of anything in my life. Three years of silence had led me here, to this desk, this man, this reckless surrender, and for once I didn’t flinch from the thought.

He leaned down, his broad chest pressing into my back, his mouth right at my ear. "This ride’s going to ruin you for anyone else," he murmured, low and certain. "You ready for that?"

I gripped the edge of the wood, my knuckles turning white, my breath catching in my chest. "Ruin me."