Chapter 303 - 0303: Do You Love Jaxx?

Chapter 303: Chapter 0303: Do You Love Jaxx?

Elena’s Point Of View

I sat there on the velvet cushions, the fabric feeling like sandpaper against my raw skin. Opening my eyes, I felt the salt from my tears making the bright office lights sting like a thousand tiny needles. Each blink brought fresh discomfort, but I couldn’t look away from Lexy. Her question hung in the air like a thick, suffocating fog, demanding an answer I wasn’t sure I could give.

"Now that you say it..." I started, my voice cracking, a jagged sound in the silent room. The words caught in my throat, fighting against the truth I’d been avoiding. I furrowed my brows, trying to force my brain to work through the trauma, to piece together fragments that had never quite fit.

My hands trembled in my lap, fingers twisting together in a desperate attempt to ground myself. Somewhere in the back of my mind, a small voice warned me that once spoken, these thoughts could never be unspoken again.

"It’s true. It doesn’t make sense." I drew a shaky breath, feeling it rattle through my chest. "I mean, number one, the names, Lex. They don’t even share the same last name. It’s Graham Sinclair. Always has been." I paused, the realization settling over me like ice water, chilling me from the inside out. How had I never questioned this before? How had I let myself remain so blind? What else had I missed, blinded by grief and routine and the sheer exhaustion of simply surviving?

"But Jaxx? He’s Jaxx Moretti. I’ve seen his legal documents, the wire transfers... everything says Moretti." The memory of those papers flashed through my mind, stark and undeniable. I could picture them now, crisp white pages with that name printed in bold black letters, a name I had read a hundred times without truly seeing it.

"I recently discovered that his grandfather, his mother’s father, is Moretti. That’s why it makes sense. He chose his mother’s family." My throat tightened, emotion threatening to overwhelm me again. "I don’t even blame him for that choice. If I’d had his childhood, I might have done the same thing."

Lexy’s eyes widened, her jaw practically hitting the coffee table. The shock on her face mirrored the growing unease in my chest. She leaned in closer, her knees bumping against mine, her presence suddenly urgent and electric. I could feel the heat of her conviction, the certainty that we were onto something significant, something that had been hiding in plain sight for years.

"That’s right! And think about it, Elena." Her voice dropped to an intense whisper, as though speaking too loudly might shatter the fragile truth we were constructing. "In all those years at that school, even with Jaxx lurking in the shadows and Graham being the golden boy, no one ever spotted them together. Not once."

She grabbed my hand, squeezing it as if to anchor the truth between us. Her grip was almost painful, but I welcomed it. I needed something solid to hold onto, something that wouldn’t shift or lie or disappear when I needed it most. "Even if they were in the same hallway, they acted as if the other didn’t exist. Like strangers passing on a street." Her words came faster now, building momentum, her excitement at unraveling the mystery warring with the darker implications we both sensed lurking beneath it.

"They were like two planets in different galaxies, never crossing paths, never acknowledging each other’s existence." Her eyes searched mine, looking for confirmation, for understanding. "What kind of brothers do that? What kind of siblings pretend the other one isn’t even there?"

I released a long, shaky sigh, the kind that makes your whole chest ache and leaves you feeling hollow afterward. "I don’t know, Lex. Maybe he was the secret shame. Perhaps Sebastian hid him away like a dirty little secret until he became too powerful to ignore." Saying it aloud made the cruelty of it feel suddenly, sickeningly real, as though I were seeing the Sinclair family for the first time without the gloss of wealth and polish I’d once mistaken for grace.

I pressed my fingers against my temples, trying to ease the headache building there, a dull throb that seemed to pulse in time with my racing thoughts. "But honestly? I don’t want to think about it anymore. I don’t care if his name is Sinclair, Moretti, or the King of England. I no longer want anything to do with that bloodline. I’m done being their playground."

The tears started again, unbidden and hot, dripping onto my lap and staining the fabric of my skirt with dark spots that bloomed like bruises. I felt like a fool, a high-achieving, successful, pathetic fool who should have known better. All my degrees, all my accomplishments, all my carefully constructed walls, and still I’d walked straight into another Sinclair trap. I thought of the years I’d spent rebuilding myself after Graham, brick by careful brick, only to discover the foundation had been cracked all along.

Lexy immediately lunged across the gap, wrapping her arms around me so tight I could hear her heartbeat thrumming against my ear, steady and reassuring, an anchor in the storm. "Everything will be okay, Elena," she whispered into my hair, her voice thick with fierce protectiveness, the kind only a best friend can summon. "You’ve survived the Sinclairs before. You’ll be fine. You’re the strongest woman I know."

I shook my head against her shoulder, my sobs muffled by her blazer. The scent of her familiar perfume, something floral and comforting, jasmine mixed with vanilla, made me cry harder, reminding me of simpler times when heartbreak seemed like something that only happened to other people, back when we were young and reckless and certain that whatever pain came our way, we could laugh it off by morning.

"It hurts, Lex. It really, really hurts. It’s not just the lie. It’s the fact that I let my guard down. I thought..." My voice cracked, splintering like glass, and I had to swallow hard before continuing. "God, I actually thought he was the one person who wasn’t looking for a piece of me. That he saw me. Just me."

Lexy pulled back suddenly, gripping my shoulders with both hands, her fingers digging in just enough to ground me. She looked me straight in the eye, her expression turning uncharacteristically solemn. Her usual playful demeanor had vanished, replaced by something deeper, more serious, the look she got when she was about to ask a question that would change everything. The silence stretched between us, heavy and pregnant with words I wasn’t ready to hear.

"Elena," she said softly, her gaze searching mine with an intensity that made me want to look away. "Do you love him? Do you love Jaxx?"

My eyes widened so far I thought they’d pop. The word felt like a physical blow to the stomach, knocking the air from my lungs and leaving me gasping. "Love? Lexy, are you insane? I hate him!" The words came out sharper than I intended, defensive and raw, laced with a desperation that even I could hear.

"Why would you even ask that after everything I just told you? After what he did to me in high school? Why would I love a man who treats my life like a game of chess, moving pieces around for his own amusement?" I stood up abruptly, needing to move, needing to escape the intensity of her gaze and the truth it threatened to uncover.

I paced the length of my office, my heels clicking a frantic, irregular beat against the hardwood floor, a staccato rhythm that matched my racing pulse. My hands trembled as I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hold the pieces together. The city lights outside my window blurred into streaks of gold and white, indifferent to the storm raging inside me.

"There is nothing between us! There has never been anything real, and there never will be. He’s a liar, a manipulator, and a Sinclair through and through. I’m finally free of that family, and I am not, I repeat, NOT falling in love with the shadow version of my ex-husband!"

But even as the words poured out of my mouth, my mind was a chaotic mess, a whirlwind of contradictions I couldn’t reconcile. My thoughts were spinning, reeling back to moments I desperately wanted to forget but couldn’t seem to erase. The way he had looked at me in the boxing ring, his eyes dark with something I couldn’t name, hunger, maybe, or recognition, or something far more dangerous.

The way he had touched me in the dark, his fingers gentle despite his rough exterior, tracing patterns on my skin that still burned when I thought about them. The way he had defended me downstairs against his own father, his voice cold and cutting in my defense, standing between me and Sebastian like a shield I never asked for but somehow needed.

The anger was there, burning and bright, a familiar companion I could understand and control. But underneath it lurked something else, something terrifyingly deep and confusing that I refused to acknowledge, a pull I couldn’t explain and didn’t want to examine too closely.

I couldn’t possibly feel that way toward him. Not after the humiliation he’d put me through, the years of torment that had shaped who I’d become. Not after the secrets he’d kept, the lies he’d told by omission. Not after everything that had transpired between us, the wounds that hadn’t fully healed.

I looked at the door, the wood grain blurring as my vision clouded again with fresh tears that I angrily blinked away. I told myself he was a monster, a villain in my story who deserved nothing but my contempt.

I told myself he was a mistake, a temporary lapse in judgment brought on by loneliness and proximity. I repeated it like a mantra, hoping that if I said it enough times, my heart would eventually start believing the lies my brain was desperately trying to sell it.

My chest felt tight, constricted, as if my ribcage had become too small to contain everything I was feeling, the rage, the hurt, the confusion, and that other thing I refused to name. I could never love him. Never. The word echoed in my mind, but it rang hollow, unconvincing even to my own ears, a denial that felt more like a question than a statement.

And somewhere beneath the noise of my own protests, quiet and persistent as a heartbeat, I wondered if Lexy had already seen the truth I was still too afraid to face.