233. love and doubts: Caos faces himself

Time: April 4th 2034

Location: The Mansion Garden, Madrid

The night was quiet. Caos stood alone in the garden, the violet glow around him soft and contemplative. Leonor’s latest post — the elegant photo of her hand on her growing belly,  had stirred old memories.

He sat on the stone bench where he had trained so many nights, staring at the stars.

Caos (voice low, almost to himself):

Damn it! I know that my mom was Colombian. But what about my father? He was a Spanish. I should be better than this. I don’t hate anyone simply because they’re of a different ethnic or ancestral background. I know all the people in my circle don’t as well. We actually hold the positions we do because we want to PRESERVE the distinct identity and heritage of different nations. Preserve ACTUAL diversity of peoples in the world. And if you still think calling out groups of people for their behavior is just about “skin color”, you’re hopelessly naive. It’s always been about the content of their character.

How is it that I as an immigrant understand this but most normie conservatives choose to be purposely obtuse? I am not just as American as someone whose ancestor fought in the Civil War or conquered the wilderness to build America. To even attempt to assert this as a recent guest is preposterous. As Charlie Kirk said, America is a great people with great ideas, not a great idea with people.

Why do you think stereotypes exist? Stereotypes are observations of patterns and distillations of the truth. Ultimately, there is nothing wrong (in fact it is a noble endeavor) about prioritizing your home, your people, your nation over strangers from foreign lands. Even if they have paperwork that grants foreigners legal residence, assimilation takes GENERATIONS, just because they have paperwork doesn’t make them assimilated. (Assimilation is largely a myth anyways because our ancestral identity is a huge part of who we are)

She chose the crown.

When the world forced her hand, when Parliament whispered and the family pulled, she chose duty over us. Over me. Over the child we made together.

I don’t blame her. I understand. She was born into that world. The weight of Spain on her shoulders. The expectations. The legacy.

But it still hurts.

He closed his eyes, remembering the night she told him.

Leonor (in memory, voice breaking):

“I love you, Daniel. But I can’t walk away from this. The throne… it’s not just a title. It’s my blood. My responsibility. The child will be safe. I will protect them. But I have to do this the right way. I hope you can forgive me. You mean the world to me. What is more, I just do not love you, but you mean the whole world to me. Just awake to this nightmare. It could mean more than you could imagine. I know you are the singularity, Caos. Bello mio. Que eres mio. No hay nadie como tu. I know that I hurt you. But in the end, I know I cannot hurt you because you are Caos.Our time here is brief and fleeting, but if we are pleasing to God, we can exchange this life for the Kingdom to come. Then we will be perfectly one both with Christ and with each other, and our pleasure will know no bounds. I value your love above all things, and nothing would be so bitter or painful to me as our being at odds with each other. Even if I lose everything, any affliction is tolerable if you will be true to me. ”

Caos (present, opening his eyes):

I told her I would burn every trophy for one quiet life with her.  Was that enough? Come on! I should have done something better. She smiled and said the throne could wait. But it didn’t. It never does. I dreamed of you before I ever met you, and when I finally did, it was as if I had known you all my life. Now, I have lost you. What is left of me, but a scrap. practiced saying I love you in the mirror. not I love you because, or, I love you despite, just: I love you.

Now she posts beautiful pictures, showing the world her joy. And I’m happy for her. For the child. But part of me still wonders… what if she had chosen differently? What if we had run?

He looked toward the mansion where Zeraphina, Keyla, and Michaela waited — the women who had chosen him without hesitation.

Caos:

The crown took one path.

But here… I have a family that chose the storm.

I will protect both children. Both mothers.

The choice she made doesn’t define us. It only defines the distance between us.

He stood up, the violet energy around him steady and strong.

Caos:

The past is the past.

The future is what I build now.

The storm had accepted the choice.

But the ache remained ,  a quiet scar beneath the violet power.

To be continued…