Chapter 191: No More Waiting

Lauren didn’t answer immediately. Luke could see the surprise on her face, and that helped more than anything she could have said. For once, she didn’t fill the silence or turn it into a joke.

Luke lifted her hand and kissed the back of it. He had done that before, but this time he drew her closer and kissed her mouth instead of letting go.

Lauren responded almost at once. Her free hand slid behind his neck as Luke backed her carefully against the counter, keeping his injured wrist away from her body. His left hand settled at her waist as the kiss deepened.

When Lauren made a soft sound against his mouth, Luke nearly pulled away out of habit. Then her fingers tightened in his hair, keeping him close, and he kissed her again. By the time they separated, he had forgotten what he had been afraid of doing wrong.

She looked pleased, but less composed than she had a few moments earlier. Luke kept his hand at her waist while she caught her breath.

"I’ve been thinking about this all afternoon."

Lauren’s eyes flicked toward his mouth. "Only this afternoon?"

Luke laughed. "No."

She pulled him back into another kiss. He felt her body press against his and drew her closer with his left arm. There was no avatar between them now, no game they could use to pretend this belonged to a separate part of their lives.

Lauren broke the kiss first, but Luke stayed close. A few loose strands of black hair had fallen around her cheeks, and he could see the faint tiredness beneath her eyes after a full day downstairs.

"You look really good."

Lauren blinked. "Really good?"

"That sounded better in my head." He glanced at her café blouse and the apron still tied around her waist. "I just wanted to tell you."

Her amusement softened. She touched his cheek, and Luke leaned into her palm before kissing her again. This time, neither hurried to deepen it.

When he moved to the side of her neck, Lauren inhaled sharply. Luke paused, then brushed his lips against her skin again when her hand settled firmly on his shoulder.

"Luke."

He lifted his head. Lauren was watching him through half-lidded eyes, and he could not quite keep the smile from his face.

"Don’t get smug," she said.

Luke leaned down, but Lauren met him halfway. Her fingers curled behind his neck, and the kiss put an end to any answer he might have attempted.

They barely made it through the café without stopping again. Lauren left her apron near the stairs, and by the time they reached the apartment, Luke’s left arm was around her waist. She closed the door behind them before drawing him into another kiss.

Lauren’s keys rattled against the door as she tried to put them away without leaving him. Luke eased back enough to let her reach the shelf, then waited while she slipped off her shoes. He followed her example, nudging his own together beside the mat.

For a moment, they stood in the narrow hallway without touching. Lauren had one hand against the wall, and the apartment light caught the smile she was no longer trying to hide. She reached toward him, palm open, and he took it before she could say anything.

Their footsteps sounded different without shoes. Luke heard the soft brush of her sleeve against his arm as she came close again.

Her hands slipped beneath the edge of his shirt. Luke shivered, and Lauren slowed as her gaze dropped toward his wrist.

"No numbness," he said. "No cold. Nothing unusual."

Lauren checked his expression before her hand returned to his shoulder. She stayed on his left as they moved toward the bedroom, letting him keep the injured arm clear without making him think about it every second.

Her blouse came loose in the hallway. Luke’s shirt followed, with a little help getting the sleeve past his right hand. He was looking at Lauren when he nearly walked into the bedroom doorframe, and she caught his shoulder before he hit it.

"Careful."

Luke looked at the wood inches from his face. "That would’ve been difficult to explain."

Lauren laughed and led him the rest of the way. Beside the bed, he stopped with his heart pounding, suddenly aware that the moment he had imagined so often was no longer something waiting in the future.

Downstairs, he had only needed to think about kissing her. Now he found himself wondering what he should do next, whether he should sit, and why none of the answers seemed obvious.

Lauren’s teasing disappeared as she touched his cheek. "We can slow down."

Luke shook his head, then reconsidered. "Maybe a little."

"Okay."

They sat on the edge of the bed with their knees touching. Lauren left her hand beside his instead of asking another question, and Luke threaded his fingers through hers. He looked at their joined hands while his breathing settled.

"I thought I’d be less nervous by now."

Lauren leaned her shoulder against his. "You’re eighteen, it’s your first time, and you’ve spent most of the day pretending you weren’t thinking about it."

"I wasn’t pretending very well."

"No."

Luke laughed, and the tightness in his chest eased. Lauren passed him the glass from the bedside table. Luke drank before offering it back, and she finished the little that remained. She set the empty glass down within reach, then nudged his knee with hers.

"You’re sitting on the edge."

He glanced down. Another inch would have put him on the floor, so he shifted farther onto the mattress and turned toward her. Lauren moved with him, folding one leg beneath herself so they could sit facing each other instead of staring straight ahead.

His fingers touched the inside of her wrist, where he felt her pulse beating quickly. He looked up, surprised.

"You’re nervous too?"

"A little." She glanced at their hands before meeting his eyes again. "I want tonight to be good for you."

Luke brushed his thumb over her fingers. "For you too."

Lauren drew his hand closer and rested it against her cheek. The light caught the little mole beside her mouth when she looked up. He stayed there while her eyes closed for a moment, letting her hold him as long as she needed. When she opened her eyes, she leaned forward and kissed him, and Luke answered without the impatient rush that had carried them upstairs.

His left hand moved along her waist. She shifted closer, giving him room when he hesitated rather than taking over immediately. Once, he leaned at an awkward angle and nearly put weight through his injured wrist, but Lauren caught his forearm before he braced against the mattress.

Luke looked down at their tangled arms. "That wasn’t what I meant to do."

Her quiet laugh drew one from him too. They adjusted until his right hand rested safely beside him, and the mistake no longer seemed worth being embarrassed about.

As the last of their clothes came off, Luke fell quiet again. He had seen Lauren in revealing outfits and stared at Yvonne inside Powerforge more times than he wanted to admit. Being here with her was different from either memory.

Lauren noticed him watching. "What?"

He tried to answer, but nothing came out. A small, uncertain smile appeared on her face while she waited, and Luke gave up searching for words. He reached for her with his left hand and drew her close.

Lauren kissed him, one hand resting against his cheek. They settled onto the bed together, taking care to leave his right arm where it would not end up beneath either of them. She stayed close while he adjusted the pillow behind his shoulder.

The lamp beside the bed shone directly across Lauren’s face when she leaned over him. Luke reached toward it with his left hand, but she caught his fingers before he found the switch.

"Leave it on. Just turn it toward the wall."

He adjusted the shade until the light softened. Lauren moved her hand out of his way, her fingertips brushing lightly across his knuckles. The lamp lit the curve of her cheek without making her squint, and Luke found her watching him as he lay back against the pillow.

She settled closer, bringing the pillow with her rather than making him stretch across the mattress. Luke kissed her once, slowly, and felt her hand relax against his shoulder. She stayed there afterward, close enough that the slightest movement brought their faces together.

For a while, they did little more than kiss. Lauren guided him when he needed it, sometimes with a quiet word and sometimes by moving his hand. Luke listened, but he also began choosing for himself instead of waiting for her to direct every movement.

When he hesitated, she gave him time. He watched the changes in her expression and spoke when he was unsure, finding it easier once he stopped trying to hide the questions.

At one point, she leaned close to his ear. "Good boy."

Luke lost the thought he had been trying to finish. Lauren laughed softly at his reaction, and he turned his head toward her.

"You did that on purpose."

She kissed his cheek, making no attempt to deny it. Luke smiled and kissed her in return, leaving the unfinished thought alone.

Their first time was awkward in places, intense in others, and far less polished than anything Luke had imagined. They adjusted when something felt wrong and paused when they needed to. Lauren stayed with him through the uncertainty, and he gradually stopped treating each unfamiliar moment as something he might fail.

When she touched his face, Luke turned toward her palm. He had been thinking about the words for longer than he wanted to admit, but saying them still made his heart beat harder.

"I love you."

Lauren went still. Luke watched her face, resisting the urge to fill the silence before she could answer. Her fingers moved gently along his cheek, and she leaned close enough that her forehead nearly touched his.

"I love you too."

He closed his eyes when she kissed him. For several seconds, he held her close and let himself believe the answer without searching for another question.

Much later, they lay together beneath the blanket. Lauren rested partly across his chest, her black hair spread over his shoulder and pillow. Luke’s right wrist remained safely beside him while his left arm curved around her.

Neither spoke for a while. Her breathing slowed against his chest, and Luke rested his head against the pillow without disturbing her.

Lauren traced one finger across his chest, then lifted her head to look at his right arm. Luke followed her attention and shifted his fingers slightly before letting them relax again.

"Nothing’s changed," he said. "It’s still comfortable there."

She touched his forearm lightly and settled back against him. Luke pulled the blanket higher around them, only for Lauren to draw most of it toward herself.

"You have almost all of it."

"You’re warm."

He tugged once, but she held on. Luke looked at the woman curled against him and let her keep it, tucking the remaining edge over his leg.

He had imagined the aftermath feeling enormous, as though he would know immediately that something about him had changed. Instead, Lauren’s hair tickled his chin, and her hand rested loosely over his chest. When he shifted, she moved with him without waking herself fully.

Luke brushed a strand away from her mouth. She opened her eyes and found him watching, but he did not look away this time.

"Are you comfortable?" he asked.

Lauren glanced at the pillow she had abandoned, then back at him. "Very."

"Then stay."

She tucked herself closer, and Luke rested his cheek against her hair. The room was warm, his arm fit around her, and he had no wish to move either.

Lauren murmured something against his chest. He tilted his head, unable to make out the words, and she lifted her face just enough for him to hear.

"Good boy."

Luke smiled and kissed her. When she settled against him again, he kept his left arm around her and let the quiet return.