Chapter 28: No Way, Your Headcanon Is Seriously Toxic

Chapter 28: Chapter 28: No Way, Your Headcanon Is Seriously Toxic

Qin Zhan’s expression was the very picture of stern righteousness.

This wasn’t an excuse.

The Bun Sect’s initiation procedures strictly forbade any shady back-door deals. Anyone caught would be expelled from the Bun Sect.

As for his master’s talk about becoming an elder, that was even more out of the question.

’He’d joined the sect before his master. If anyone was going to be an elder, it should be him first!’

’He absolutely had no intention of betraying his master and forsaking his roots.’

"Then do Outer Disciples get a chance to eat this pork knuckle?"

Seeing that Qin Zhan wasn’t lying, the rejected Heavenly Wind Taoist thought for a moment and made a major concession.

’No problem. He could just use a different identity to get in.’

’When you’re out navigating the world, you’ve got to have a few alternate identities ready for a bit of murder, arson, and mayhem.’

"They can!"

And just like that, the Bun Sect gained three more Outer Disciples: the Heavenly Wind Taoist and the Lou Family couple, who also decided to join.

Lou Xiaotian’s experience resonated deeply with Qin Zhan. When the two later met, they hit it off immediately, becoming sworn brothers despite having different parents and surnames.

They shared a common, painful lesson.

And that was... ’these old geezers are absolute monsters!’

The two families staged a whole palace drama over half a pork knuckle, while Uncle Li was at home, blissfully enjoying four whole ones by himself.

As for Lu Wu, she checked the time and set off for the Valley of Ten Thousand Poisons. The path was easy to follow, and the place wasn’t hard to find.

The valley entrance resembled a narrow gorge, with high cliff walls stretching toward the sky, leaving only an opening about three meters wide for passage.

This was no Peach Blossom Spring with fragrant grass and a shower of petals. There was no wide-open expanse waiting after a few dozen steps. The deeper one went, the more bizarre the environment became.

Unlike the vibrant green of a normal forest, the flora surrounding the Valley of Ten Thousand Poisons was stained with a kind of iridescent black.

People couldn’t get away fast enough from the gaudy, ostentatious plants.

They were all poisonous.

Someone had once tested it and found that even the toxins in the valley’s soil could easily be lethal.

Fortunately, the toxins in the soil were only effective upon ingestion, and one assumed no fool would actually come here to eat dirt.

The spot designated by the system for her stall was a safe zone in the outer area. All poisonous plants and creatures nearby had been cleared out, providing a place for people to rest.

As a result, there were quite a few people in the clearing.

Upon Lu Wu’s arrival, they sized her up with faintly warning glances but made no other moves.

In the wilds, robbery and murder were all too common.

Especially with strangers, one needed to be endlessly cautious and wary.

But Lu Wu looked utterly harmless. Even without the concealing effect of the Ruyi hairpin, a novice Cultivator at the Third Level of Qi Refining posed no threat to them.

Lu Wu glanced around but didn’t recognize anyone.

She took her food stall out of her storage bag. Lu Wu had made a slight modification to it: a large pot was set into the stove to keep the pork knuckles warm.

The moment she set up the food stall, she was, unsurprisingly, met with numerous stares reserved for an idiot.

No one who ventured into the Valley of Ten Thousand Poisons was a pushover.

Most were hardened individuals who lived on the edge, and they weren’t easy to get along with.

It wasn’t as if no one had ever set up a stall here before. But human nature is a treacherous thing; as soon as a vendor made any profit, they’d inevitably suffer an "accident" and lose everything.

The prevailing attitude was "If I’m not doing well, no one else can either."

Over time, people gave up on the idea of doing business here.

Of course, the occasional stubborn soul would try their luck, but they never lasted more than a few days before vanishing.

And now, the crowd was treating Lu Wu’s little endeavor as a bit of free entertainment.

By now, Lu Wu could calmly face their strange looks. She hung up her menu.

"Love-It-To-Death Pork Knuckle, Ten Low-Grade Spirit Stones Each."

The corny yet eye-catching name immediately drew more attention, and Lu Wu heard several snickers.

Braving the stares, Lu Wu took out the large, pre-stewed pork knuckles and placed them in the pot to keep warm.

’This might not be a power-fantasy novel, but Lu Wu was confident she was about to star in a classic face-slapping scene.’

The still-steaming pork knuckles began to exude their full, unbridled charm.

The rich, soul-stirring aroma drifted on the winds at the edge of the valley, easily reaching the noses of those nearby.

Though the aroma was intangible, a few of the closer men fell into a daze, imagining a peerless beauty dancing before their eyes.

Her smooth, tender skin and delectable face tempted them to take things a step further.

Even though her skin was an unusual honey-glazed color, they still yearned to lose themselves in her embrace.

Mouths watered and hearts pounded.

SLAP!

"An illusion! This is an illusion!"

A middle-aged man snapped out of the aroma-induced trance and, with lingering fear, slapped himself hard across the face.

He clearly hadn’t held back, as his cheek was already visibly swelling.

The pain kept him alert.

The honey-glazed beauty in his mind had indeed vanished, but the aroma still lingered in the air, a testament to its reality.

"Impossible!"

"I must be poisoned!"

The man yelled, refusing to believe that a mere pork knuckle could have seduced him.

He fumbled in his storage bag, pulled out an Antidote Pill, and swallowed it.

Believing the pill had taken effect, the man’s tense body relaxed. But in the next instant, the scent of meat invaded his senses once again.

The fragrance was all-pervasive, threatening to bring the vision of the honey-glazed beauty back into his mind.

"Could this be some kind of rare toxin..."

The man gasped, his face turning purple, his eyes wide with horror.

Realizing the Antidote Pill was useless, he completely lost hope. He collapsed to the ground, his eyes turning gray as if awaiting his imminent death.

It all happened too fast.

The man seemed utterly convinced he was poisoned—and that there was no cure. ℯℯ𝑙.

The look he shot Lu Wu was full of hatred, yet some fear held him back from approaching.

His despairing, lifeless expression left Lu Wu completely dumbfounded.

!!!

’Dude, seriously?’

’Was this level of drama really necessary?’

’She’d heard the Cultivators here were cautious, but she didn’t think they’d jump to such wild conclusions at the slightest provocation!’

He had imagined a simple pork knuckle into a deadly poison. Watching the man drag himself to a shady spot to lie down and wait for death, a chill ran down Lu Wu’s spine.

Because after witnessing this spectacle, the other onlookers—no matter how tempted they were by the aroma—completely abandoned any notion of buying. In fact, they grew even more wary of Lu Wu’s presence.

’It looked like her pork knuckles weren’t going to sell after all.’

Lu Wu was completely bewildered. She suddenly found herself missing the enthusiastic, thronging customers of Yanliu Street.

’Boo hoo... Fam, where are you?!’

No fight broke out.

In their minds, one should never provoke someone who could silently spread such a deadly poison unless they were absolutely certain of victory.

"My pork knuckles aren’t poisonous."

Lu Wu explained weakly, but to no avail. No one believed her.

"My stomach..."

In the shade, the man clutched his rumbling stomach, his face growing even paler as he assumed the poison was taking effect.

He curled into a ball, his back turned to the crowd.

His desolate silhouette served as a warning to everyone present.

The wind soughs, the Yi River runs cold; once the hero departs, he will never return.

Farewell, brother!