Chapter 311 – Re: Location

Flashback

"What the? Where am I?" John said looking around the empty throne room he found himself standing in. It was fairly large, with white marble floors and dressed stone walls painted white, with intricately carved robed women standing with their arms spread as pillars supporting the ceiling. A red carpet ran down the centre of the room, ending at the base of an ornately carved stone throne. 

"I was just in the forest outside the village... then... this?" He kept looking around to see if he recognized anything, but he came up short. He had been on his way back home, ready to apologize for his outburst. Those were his feelings, but he should have handled it differently. 

"Well, well, well. So you are the anomaly my dear husband has taken a shine to." A distinctly feminine, ethereal voice echoed through the room.

John spun around, trying to find the source of the voice. "That could be a number of different gods or god-like beings. Do I happen to know your husband? Or is he just watching me from afar like your kind seem to like to do?"

"A little of both. I believe he has promised you something for coming here and hanging around my world for a couple of months." The voice came from behind him now, no longer echoing through the chamber. "I'm here now to train you how to use your reward, and you can leave this world and never return."

John spun on his heels towards the source of the voice. A familiar looking brunette woman was seated on the throne, one he was sure he had seen before but he couldn't quite put a finger on it. She was middle age, but quite attractive, with creamy white skin and light brown eyes. She wore a two-tone silver-and-black strapless dress, the cut exposing a long, toned leg. "Why do I think I know you?"

"Well, we have never met before now, though you might know- What in the heck! Why is my throne covered in- Eww! Eww! Eww! Eww! Eww!" She squealed, leaping from the throne in a distinctly ungoddess-like manner.

"I got it! Your that woman on the bus!"

"Eww... Who would dare cover my throne in- What? What are you talking about?" She said, pressing a hand to her forehead in frustration. 

"You know, the bus that couldn't go slower than 60 or else a bomb would go off... or was it 45? I can't remember... You look like a woman from that movie... god what was the actresses name... Ahh! Sandra Bullock!"

"I uh... well, this isn't going how I planned." She said, dropping her hand and placing it on her hip. 

"That seems to be a common theme around me," John replied, happy he remembered something so minor from all the way back to the 90s. His brain really was working a lot better these days. 

"Right. Well... I'm not Sandra Bullock, just like my husband isn't Morgan Freeman. I go by many names, but you may call me Destiny... And no, I'm not a damn stripper. Stupid bitches on your Earth ruined my damn name. You know it used to mean something epic and momentous... now people's first thoughts are some middle age divorced woman trying to turn tricks and rekindle their youth with a bunch of 1 dollar bills hanging off their underwear."

"Umm... You okay?"

"I'm fine..."

"Want to talk about it?"

"NO! I'm here to talk about you, John, not about people abusing my name!"

"If you say so."

"It's just so damn..."

"And then he goes ahead and sleeps with that goddess! I mean seriously! I know we have an open marriage, but he promoted her to the next level just so she was no longer under his direct supervision but mine, so he could say he wasn't playing favourites. I should have known something was up when the Goddess of Fortune suddenly fell under my purview instead of his."

"I see. And did you talk to him about your concerns?" He asked. He was seated on the freshly cleaned throne, while Destiny was draped across his lap, letting out all of her feelings without letting him really get a word in.

This feels oddly familiar. 

"Well... not quite. Instead, I made him clean the toilets in Tartarus with a toothbrush for a few years. When he finally finished, we had a wonderful vacation at Disney Multiverse 4... he even got us the princess suite... I won't kiss and tell, but our 358th daughter was born a year later."

"So you think-"

"Then a few centuries later..."

"Ahh, this was great! I'm glad I got that off my chest. Thank you!"

"You're welcome, Ma'am, and it was no problem. Sometimes you just need vent."

"You're really easy to talk to, you know that? Gods, I haven't felt this good in years. Want a blowjob before we get started?"

"No thanks. Open marriage or not, I would never dally with another man's wife." He said with a laugh. Even Little John agreed, having softened despite having a sexy goddess grinding his lap as she made grand gestures while she talked for the last... however long they were here.

"You're a good man, ya know that?"

"Some days. So, what did you want to talk to me about? Something about Fate's reward? Wait? Does that mean-"

"Yes, it does, John. I've already started editing your body and mind while we were talking, so now its just a matter of time for you to get used to your new skills. I suggest you do that first before you head back to the village, or else you are going to get stuck only half-assing it." 

"What?"

"Welcome to the divine, my little demigod. You are now a level 9 Demigod in the Pantheon of Order and Chaos."

"Really? I... don't feel any different."

"Hah, you still need to train and grow stronger like any being, but now you can share those powers of yours with your followers."

"That would be amazing! How?"

"It would normally be an innate skill you would need to spend about a century training to access, but since you're with DEN, I just hijacked their system a little bit. Tee Hee!" She said, giving him a playful smile before becoming more serious. "Actually, bring up that redhead girl, Rubellia or Ruby in your party menu. She actually needs you right now."

"What?" He said, then opened up the Party Menu for the first time in weeks. Instead of the normal menu that had a picture of her in the top right, there was a bird's-eye view of her running through the woods, fully armed and armoured. A giant green snake was chasing her, quickly closing the distance. "What do I do?"

"Easy! As long as her love, lust, or devotion to you is high enough, you can share one of your powers with her as a boon. I made it a nice drop-down list, so you don't need to figure out how to do this the long way."

"Right. Now- oh shit." He swore. The snake threw its tongue out like a frog's, smacking Ruby in the ass from below. She went sailing into the air like she was jumping on a trampoline. 

"Pick something, or else she is gonna be snake food. You will feel a little-" Destiny started to say, but John was already scrolling down the list and slammed his finger down on Divine Shield. It was at a lower level than his own, but it would still do the job. Suddenly his view shifted, and he was behind her, thirty or so feet in the air. The snake was below them, coiling faster than he thought possible, jaws wide open.

Crap! Now what?

Flailing for a moment, he grabbed onto Ruby as they started to plunge. That was when he realized his body was ethereal, like a ghost. When he touched her, he could feel everything she was feeling, like they were his own thoughts. Surprisingly she wasn't scared, but calm, collected. She was praying to him, fully believing even moments before her death that he would save her.

Jesus. Don't put that on me! What in the world are you even doing in this situation!?!?! 

Pushing the thought to the side, he slid into her body, then activated the divine shield. A golden glow surrounded them as the snake closed its mouth on her. She then swung her scythe with a scream.

*BAM!*

He was back in the throne room, Destiny's arms draped over his shoulders, her eyes closed, her forehead pressed to his. 

"Good. That was exactly right. Now she has access to your spell without you needing to do that again."

"Holy crap. I thought I was actually there for a moment. What in the hell is she doing?"

"She is out with most of the other girls that share your bed, trying to level them up enough to evolve again. They think that is why you won't treat them as women because they look closer to young teenage humans and not full adults."

"That isn't it... Well, not all of it at any rate."

"Do you want to talk about it? We can change spots on the chair if you want?"

"I don't mind talking about it... I need to talk with someone about it... but I'm not sitting on your lap." 

"Well, we have all the time in the world. Fate is going to be cleaning for a few weeks yet, so our makeup sex won't be happening until then anyway."

"I see. Well, I'm happy to see your... unique... marriage works for you."

"After four billion, seven hundred and twenty-three million, five hundred and ten thousand, three hundred years, it takes a bit of work to keep things interesting. Alas, our aspects are intertwined, so if we ever divorce, things would get messy. And I don't mean who gets to keep the kids and the house kind of messy."

"I'm not sure I want to know."

"You probably don't. Now, enough about me. Let's talk about you! I know I made them pretty easy to get, but why is it so hard for you to accept their love for you?"

"Well..."

Present

"And that was that. Afterwards, she told me to take some time to practice with all of my new powers somewhere secluded, then called for that Stag to give me a lift up here in the mountains. She stopped in a couple of times to check on my progress with developing the system side of this boon and gave me some pointers, but yeah, that is pretty much what I have been up to for the last week." John said, idly rubbing her thighs as he told her his story.

"So you told my old bosses wife about all your problems instead of coming to me about them?"

"That is usually how therapy works. You don't talk with people closest with you, at least not at first. I'm a demigod now, and that was your first question?"

"That is the only question that matters, John." She was happy for him; she truly was, but she felt disappointed that she wasn't the one he came to with his problems. "Is this still me paying for the gate incident?"

"The gate incident? You still remember that?"

"It's burned into my mind... I think that was the first time you were truly angry at me and... it was scary."

"Hmm... it might have been, but I think you've already paid for that in full and then some."

"Right. I died. Sometimes I forget about that... it happened so quickly, then I arrived in DEN... Some days, it still doesn't feel real."

"I know the feeling. So do you still want me to tell you why I haven't made a move on the Mi and Ee?"

"Because they are both so young?"

"At first that was a problem... though I have come to accept that they are not actually children. My real problem is they lack life experience... Sure, they have all this innate knowledge from their race, and seem to soak up knowledge faster than a child prodigy, but... I've been the only real male role model in their whole lives. It made me feel like I've unintentionally groomed them to love me... It was really bothering me to the point of wanting to start being cruel and driving them away, but I couldn't do that either. It not in me to do that to people I care about, at least not intentionally."

"No, I didn't think it was in you to be cruel without cause. I take it you didn't want to talk to any of us about this?"

"I makes me seem like a monster... and despite this body, I'm not a monster."

"What about Sato and Ruby?"

"I didn't want to be Sato's rebound after her lover died. I figured showing her some compassion and kindness would help with her trauma, and allowing her to sleep with us would be good for her, as it's one of the communal things goblins do. I didn't expect her to want the same thing as Sei was thinking and wanting to become one of my wives. 

As for Ruby... She is a sweet young thing, with a bright future ahead of her. I knew she had been a bit lost and feeling alone, even sleeping beside your rabbits for company. I had noticed her and Sato seemed to be getting a bit closer, so I thought adding her to our sleeping arrangement would help them both. Honestly, I've gotten so used to group sleeping now, I didn't think she would fall in love with me because of a simple kindness."

"I'm pretty sure she was already infatuated with you the moment you rescued her. The same goes for the other human women."

"Yeah... she was. But according to Destiny, it was also how the canon of this story was written. All the human women fell in love with the man I replaced rather easy and quickly, as did Mi, Riana, and another woman I haven't met yet. Even when he was being a monster and treating them like crap, they overlooked that because that was how this world was designed." He said with a sigh. "So unless I completely crack the canon of this world, ending its hold on them, they will continue to gravitate towards me no matter what I do."

"She told you about this world? Shoot... I was going to tell you what I learned from your sister about it... but you probably already know."

"Yeah. I was scrying you when she gave you the rundown. Destiny confirmed a few things during our conversations, but for the most part it will no longer matter."

"Why not?"

"Because when we leave here, we will never return. At least not through the DEN doors."

"WHAT?!? Why? NO! I can't accept that!"

"Oh? Why not?"

"We have friends here, family. All that work we did building the village, the mana well, and all the expansion plans! You have children about to be born! Do you need me to go on?"

"Yes, we do. Don't worry, this is just one of these fun little twists that DEN likes to throw me... Right, Darling?"

"Yep. From the director himself." A voice said beside her. She lifted her head from John's chest and saw Xiaolin seated in the water right beside them, holding that odd camera of hers near their faces. In her other hand was a manila envelope with a wax seal. "Sign that, and we have a deal."

"Xiaolin?!?" She said, but was ignored for the moment as the two talked. John continued to rub her back, his hands feeling absolutely divine, so she just lay back down on his chest and enjoyed the contact.

You would think I would feel odd with another of his lovers sitting there with a camera recording us... but I... I feel turned on. Oh me, am I turning into an exhibitionist?

"Hah, signing this time? Not just a verbal agreement?"

"Well, you're now taking responsibility for their souls. Even gods can't avoid the bureaucracy, you know."

"Thanks, Darling. I'll review it in the morning. We still on for our vacation next weekend?" He asked, taking the envelope from her. It dissapeared in a flash a moment later.

"You know it! I've got the rooms booked, and reservations at the VIP table at seven."

"Sounds great! I'm looking forward to seeing this with my own eyes."

"Xiaolin? John? What is going on?"

"Oh my dear, our husband has taken his first act as a god. I'm so proud of him." The tigerfolk woman said, running her free hand through her hair and toying with one of her horns. Her hand felt as good as John's, and she melted further into his chest.

"Not that I had much choice. I wasn't leaving my children and their mothers behind. The director knows I would have gone to war with him if he tried to force that on me. I might be an ant compared to him, but that doesn't mean I'm completely impotent."

"Ha, with that thing of yours pressing against her belly, no one would ever claim you're impotent, hon."

"Please... tell me what is going on."

"I'm taking the village, and everyone in it, with us. It's mine, and I won't let even Destiny tell me otherwise."

"Did... did you just get harder?"

"And with that, I'm gone. Enjoy yourself, dear. He is a very attentive lover; I'm sure our husband will make your first time memorable." Xiaolin said, then disappeared again.

"Wait! What?" She said, suddenly realizing she was lying naked on top of John's body, and that her eons of self-imposed chastity were about to come crashing to an end.