Chapter 186

The seer came for her at dawn.

Nyra was already awake, had been awake for hours, staring at the ceiling, her mind racing. She had slept poorly, her dreams filled with shadows and whispers and the echo of Soren’s voice calling her name. She was exhausted, her body still recovering from the Trial of Strength, but she forced herself to rise, to dress, to prepare.

Today was the day.

The final test.

The Trial of the Heart.

The seer led her through the village and into the forest, just as she had done twice before. But this time, the journey was different. This time, the trees seemed to press closer, the shadows seemed darker, the silence seemed heavier. This time, Nyra could feel the weight of what was coming a pressure in the air, a tension in her chest, a sense that something terrible was waiting for her.

They walked for hours. The sun rose and climbed and began its slow descent. And still they walked.

Finally, they reached a clearing.

At the center of the clearing stood a pool, a still, dark pool that reflected nothing. Not the sky, not the trees, not the light. Just darkness. Endless, bottomless darkness.

“This is the entrance to the final test,” the seer said. “The Trial of the Heart.”

Nyra looked at the pool. “What do I have to do?”

“You have to enter the water. You have to let it consume you. And you have to face what waits for you on the other side.”

“What waits for me?”

“I don’t know. The trial is different for everyone. It will take the form of your greatest challenge, the thing you fear most, the thing that will push you to your breaking point.” The seer paused. “It will test your heart. Your love. Your willingness to sacrifice everything for the one you love.”

“I’ve already sacrificed everything.”

“Not everything.” The seer’s eyes were ancient, knowing. “There is always more to give. The question is will you?”

Nyra took a deep breath. She thought about Soren about his smile, his laugh, his touch. She thought about the future they could have the life they could live. She thought about everything she had fought for, everything she had lost, everything she still hoped to gain.

I won’t give up, she told herself. I won’t.

She stepped into the pool.

The water was cold.

It closed over her head, dark and thick and suffocating. She tried to swim, tried to surface, tried to breathe but the water wouldn’t let her go. It pulled her down, deeper and deeper, into the darkness.

And then—

She was standing in a room.

It was a familiar room the royal chambers in the Astrlyn palace. The room where her father had lived, where her mother had died, where she had grown up. But it was different now empty, cold, abandoned. The furniture was covered in dust sheets. The windows were boarded up. The fire in the hearth had long since died.

Nyra looked around, her heart pounding. “Hello?”

No answer.

She walked through the room, her footsteps echoing on the bare floor. She touched the dust sheets, the boarded windows, the cold hearth. Everything felt wrong. Everything felt dead.

She reached the door and pushed it open.

The corridor beyond was dark so dark she could barely see her hand in front of her face. She stepped forward, her hands outstretched, feeling her way along the wall.

And then—

A voice. A familiar voice.

“Nyra.”

She spun. And there, standing in the darkness, was Soren.

He looked exactly as she remembered him tall and strong, his dark hair swept back, his golden eyes blazing. He was wearing his training clothes, the same ones he had worn during their sessions at the academy. He looked alive. He looked real.

“Soren?” Her voice was barely a whisper.

“It’s me.” He stepped closer. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Waiting for me? Where are we?”

“I don’t know. But I’ve been here for so long. Alone. In the dark.” He reached out and touched her face. His hand was warm. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” The tears were falling. “I’ve been trying to bring you back. I’ve been fighting—”

“I know. I know you have.” He smiled that same crooked smile she remembered. “But you don’t have to fight anymore. I’m here now. We’re together.”

“But—the tests—”

“Forget the tests. Forget everything. Just stay with me.” He took her hand. “Stay with me, Nyra. Forever.”

Nyra looked at him at his golden eyes, at his warm smile, at the love written across every line of his face. She wanted to stay. She wanted to forget everything and just be with him. She wanted to stop fighting, stop struggling, stop hurting.

But something was wrong.

“This isn’t real,” she whispered.

Soren’s smile faltered. “What?”

“This isn’t real. You’re not real. You’re a trick—a trap—part of the test.”

“No, Nyra. I’m real. I’m here. I’m—”

“You’re not.” She pulled her hand away. “The real Soren is in the Moon Court. He’s sleeping. He’s waiting for me to save him. And I can’t save him if I stay here with a lie.”

Soren’s face twisted first with confusion, then with anger, then with something darker. Something terrible.

“You don’t want to stay with me?”

“I want to save you. The real you.”

“There is no real me. There is only this.” He gestured around them. “This is all that’s left. This is all you’ll ever have.”

“No.” Nyra stepped back. “I don’t believe that.”

“Then you’re a fool.” Soren’s voice was cold now so different from the warm, loving voice he had used before. “You’re a fool, and you’ll fail. You’ll fail, and I’ll be trapped forever. And it will be your fault.”

“No—”

“Your fault. All your fault.” He stepped closer, his golden eyes blazing with anger. “You couldn’t save me. You couldn’t protect me. You let me die.”

“I didn’t—”

“You let me die, and now you’re letting me stay dead. Because you’re weak. Because you’re selfish. Because you don’t love me enough.”

“I do love you!”

“Then stay with me!” He grabbed her arms, his grip bruising. “Stay with me, or I’ll die. And it will be your fault. Your fault. YOUR FAULT.”

Nyra screamed.

She was somewhere else.

A battlefield bodies everywhere, blood soaking the ground, smoke rising from the ruins of a village. She was standing in the middle of it, her silver light blazing, her hands covered in blood.

And in front of her, on their knees, were her friends.

Corvin. Ragnar. Roderic. Marek. Maureen. Jasper.

They were bound, their faces pale, their eyes wide with terror. And behind them, holding a sword to their throats, was a figure cloaked in shadow.

“Choose,” the figure said.

“Choose what?”

“Choose who lives and who dies. You can save one. Only one. The others will die.”

“No.” Nyra shook her head. “No, I won’t choose.”

“You have to. That’s the test. You have to choose.”

“I won’t.”

“Then they all die.”

The figure raised its sword. Nyra screamed and lunged forward but she was too slow, too far away, too weak. The sword fell, and Corvin’s head rolled across the ground.

“No!”

Ragnar was next. Then Roderic. Then Marek. Then Maureen. Then Jasper. One by one, they died and Nyra couldn’t save any of them. She couldn’t move, couldn’t speak, couldn’t do anything but watch.

“You failed,” the figure said. “You failed them all.”

“Stop—”

“You failed Soren. You failed your friends. You failed everyone who ever believed in you.”

“STOP!”

“You’re a failure. A weakling. A disappointment. You always have been.”

“No—”

“You don’t deserve to live. You don’t deserve to love. You don’t deserve anything.”

The figure stepped closer, its shadowy hand reaching for her throat.

“You should just give up. Give up and die.”

Nyra was drowning.

Not in water, in darkness. In despair. In all the fears and doubts and insecurities that had haunted her her entire life. They consumed her swallowed her whole and she couldn’t fight them. She couldn’t fight anything.

Maybe they’re right, she thought. Maybe I am a failure. Maybe I am weak. Maybe I don’t deserve to live.

The darkness pressed in. The voices whispered. The pain consumed her.

And slowly, gradually, Nyra stopped fighting.

She stopped struggling. Stopped resisting. Stopped hoping.

She let the darkness take her.

Outside the pool, the seer watched.

She had been watching for hours standing at the edge of the dark water, her ancient eyes fixed on the surface. The sun had set. The moon had risen. The stars had appeared.

And Nyra had not emerged.

The seer’s face was unreadable. Her hands were clasped tightly in front of her. She did not move. She did not speak. She just watched.

She’s been in there too long, the seer thought. Much too long.

But she did not intervene. She could not intervene. The test was not hers to control. It belonged to the Moon Goddess and to Nyra herself.

The seer could only wait. And hope.

In the village, the others waited.

Corvin paced the length of the square, his hands clenched into fists. Ragnar stood by the fire, his scarred face pale. Roderic and Marek sat together, their eyes fixed on the forest. Maureen held Jasper’s hand. Jasper held hers back.

“She should be back by now,” Corvin said.

“The test takes as long as it takes,” Ragnar said but his voice was uncertain.

“What if she failed?”

“She didn’t fail.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No. But I know Nyra. She’s the strongest person I’ve ever met. She won’t give up.”

“She might not have a choice.”

The villagers whispered among themselves. “The Daughter of the Moon. She will save us. She will come back.”

But the hours passed. And there was no sign of her.

In the pool, in the darkness, Nyra floated.

She was not dead not quite. But she was not alive either. She was somewhere in between trapped in a place between hope and despair, between light and shadow, between life and death.

She could still feel the bond the thread that connected her to Soren. It was faint, distant, barely there. But it was still there.

Soren, she thought. Soren, help me.

No answer.

Please. I can’t do this alone.

No answer.

I love you. I love you so much. Please—

And then—

A flicker. A spark. A tiny glimmer of light in the endless darkness.

She heard his voice not the fake voice from the trial, but his real voice. The voice she had heard in her dreams. The voice that had told her he loved her.

Nyra. Don’t give up.

“Soren?”

Don’t give up. Fight. Fight for me. Fight for us.

“I can’t. It’s too hard. It’s too much.”

You can. You’re stronger than you know. You’ve always been stronger than you know.

“I’m not. I’m weak. I’m a failure.”

No. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever met. You survived the Moon Court. You survived the tests. You survived everything. You can survive this.

“I don’t know if I can.”

You can. Because I believe in you. I’ve always believed in you. And I will never stop believing in you.

The light grew brighter.

Fight, Nyra. Fight.

She reached for the light.

But the darkness consumed her.