Chapter 207: v2- - 26: a small packet I

Eventually, Adrian had carried Marian from the dining table back to the bed, where they remained together beneath the sheets.

The intensity of the morning had finally quieted.

Marian rested against him, still warm and languid, her thoughts pleasantly unfocused.

Adrian held her for a while.

He had no particular desire to move.

But eventually, duty began pressing its way back into his thoughts.

The palace had not stopped simply because he had.

There would be ministers waiting.

Reports to review.

Petitions requiring his attention.

Decisions that could not be postponed merely because he had spent the morning in bed with Marian.

Adrian exhaled quietly.

Then he pushed himself upright.

Marian watched him.

He reached for his robe and put it on before walking toward the dining table.

The remains of breakfast were still there.

Adrian picked up a clean glass and filled it with water from the carafe.

Then he returned to the bed.

Marian looked up at him.

Adrian reached toward the nightstand and opened the small drawer.

He took out a small packet.

Marian’s eyes followed his hand.

He placed the packet in her palm, then held out the glass.

"Take this."

Marian looked down at what he had given her.

She frowned slightly.

"What’s this?"

Adrian met her eyes.

"A contraceptive."

Marian went still.

For a moment, she simply stared at the small packet in her hand.

A contraceptive.

She understood what Adrian was saying.

They had been together twice now.

And he had no intention of leaving the possibility of a pregnancy to chance.

It was sensible.

Practical.

Perhaps even necessary.

She knew that.

So why did something inside her hurt?

Her fingers tightened around the packet.

She looked up at him.

Adrian’s expression gave nothing away.

He wasn’t angry.

He wasn’t accusing her.

He was simply waiting.

And somehow that made it worse.

A small, foolish part of Marian had imagined something different.

Perhaps she had imagined him waking beside her and seeing not merely a woman he desired, but the woman he had once intended to marry.

Perhaps she had imagined that after last night, after this morning, something between them had shifted enough that he might no longer be thinking in terms of precautions and boundaries.

It was ridiculous.

She knew it was.

Yet hope had never needed permission to exist.

It had simply remained there, quietly alive beneath everything she told herself.

She knew what Adrian had told her that morning.

She knew they weren’t married.

She knew last night had not erased everything that had happened between them.

She had listened to him.

She had even told herself that she understood.

But somehow, those had only been words.

Words she could acknowledge and still quietly hope around.

This was different.

This was Adrian placing the consequence of his decision directly into her hands.

A contraceptive.

He hadn’t merely told her that he hadn’t chosen her yet.

He had acted on it.

Marian looked down at the small packet.

Her fingers tightened around it.

The hurt was sudden and surprisingly deep.

She had thought she was prepared for this.

She wasn’t.

Because some small, foolish part of her had still believed that after everything they had shared since last night, perhaps his feelings had already carried him further than his words admitted.

But Adrian had drawn the boundary himself.

Not with another speech.

Not with another reminder.

With this.

And now that boundary was sitting in her palm.

Marian swallowed.

She looked up at him.

Adrian was watching her.

He said nothing.

And suddenly she understood that he was waiting to see what she would do.

If she refused, what would he think?

That she had deliberately allowed the possibility of pregnancy?

That she wanted to make herself impossible for him to put aside?

That she wanted the Emperor badly enough to secure her place beside him?

Marian’s chest tightened.

She couldn’t bear for him to think that.

Not after everything.

She had already promised him that she would choose him.

She wouldn’t give him another reason to doubt her.

Marian opened the packet.

--

(Adrian POV)

Adrian watched Marian open the packet.

He had expected her to take it.

He had wanted her to take it.

They were not married, and he had no intention of allowing a pregnancy to complicate matters before he had formally made her his wife.

Not because he was uncertain about what he wanted.

He knew what he wanted.

That part had never truly been uncertain.

But he had learned not to mistake what he wanted for what Marian wanted.

So he watched her.

Marian turned the small packet over in her hands.

Adrian said nothing.

At first, he thought only of the practical matter.

They had been together twice now. He had no intention of leaving something so consequential to chance.

Then he noticed the way she was looking at the packet.

The hesitation.

The slight tightening of her fingers.

And something shifted inside him.

He found himself wondering what she would do.

If she refused, what would he think?

That she wanted a child?

That she wanted to make herself impossible for him to put aside?

That she had deliberately allowed the possibility of pregnancy because she believed it would force his hand?

He didn’t like any of those possibilities.

But then another thought came.

What if she refused for an entirely different reason?

What if she simply wanted a child with him?

What if, beneath everything she had said and done, she wanted the life they had once been expected to have?

Adrian’s expression remained still.

He didn’t know which answer he wanted.

That realization irritated him.

He had given her the choice because he wanted to see what she would do.

Now that the choice was actually in front of her, he wasn’t certain there was an answer that would leave him satisfied.

Yet as he watched her lower her eyes, something inside him twisted. He wanted to reach for her, but pride kept his hand still.

--

Tbc