28. Birthday

I stared into my closet mirror. At that little girl in her pretty white dress. It didn't match her at all, in fact in contrast to her tanned skin and black scales it looked horrible. Yet despite the two new black nubs on her forehead, despite the green and black scales, she couldn't help but smile. She smiled so brightly that it nearly made me tear up. Why was she so happy? This wasn't her real self, I wasn't her, this body wasn't meant to bring joy. It was selfish of me to like it, yet despite everything, the girl in the mirror was me.

Lily had coaxed me into wearing the dress, in fact since she was the reason I had it in the first place I wondered why she hadn't bothered me about not wearing it sooner. Maybe if I was really a little girl and wasn't forced to wear a uniform I'd have worn it every day like a child. The idea was so appealing that I almost began to daydream about it. A stupid thought yet one I couldn't push aside like I had so many before.

To stop thinking about the dress I began thinking about Lily. She said she needed to do something and that after putting on the dress I should enter the living room. Something about a surprise. Coming from Lily I had no idea what said ‘surprise’ could actually entail. But I'd spent long enough pondering the girl in the mirror. It was high time I listened to my roommate. I readied myself for whatever would lie behind the door before opening it.

“Happy birthday!” Half a dozen voices yelled out, some trying to keep quiet so that neighbors wouldn't be disturbed. Others not caring at all about said neighbors. One stood out amongst the crowd, Diantha who gave out a wholehearted happy birthday.

“About time you left your room. I thought we'd be stuck here for hours,” Lily teased me with a large smile on her face.

I stood there for a moment unsure what to do. This kind of stuff didn't happen to me, it happened to people with friends and families that could afford to celebrate them. “I- I… Thank you.”

Those were the only words that could leave my mouth. Saying sorry didn't male sense, asking them not to hurt me didn't make sense, so that left thanking them. As the words left my mouth tears began to form around my eyes. Salt leaving my body as if all my stress was washing away. They cared about me, everybody here cared about me and gave me a birthday party. I was wanted, I was loved.

“Oh sweetie,” Diantha approached me with a bittersweet smile and hugged me.

Then Kael, Scarlet, Damian, and finally Lily. All hugging me in my pretty dress because they wanted me. They actually wanted me enough to be considered worth celebrating. My puffy cheeks began to itch as my sobbing ensued, Diantha's clothes were beginning to soak yet she didn't back off a single step. Her arms firmly held tightly onto me and I desperately wished she would never let go.

Yet the moment couldn't last forever, I knew Diantha wouldn't let go, so I did. Taking a step back Diantha gently released me and I did my best to make a smile. It was easier than I thought, maybe the easiest smile I'd ever made.

“Thank you,” I restated, it wasn't enough just to say once.

“Of course Mikayla, now why don't we have some cake?” Diantha asked with a bright smile as she brought out a knife and began slicing the cake into eight slices.

I got a slice of cake on a nice white ceramic plate. The cake was black and white with chocolate and frosting, probably the same chocolate that was used in the cookies Diantha and I baked. Biting into it the nostalgic feeling of eating a slice of cake at some random classmate's birthday party filled my mind. A neutral memory that was on the brighter edge of the spectrum.

Everybody was chatting it up with each other while I sat there next to Diantha leaning into her. She held me close and I didn't have to say a word to feel the warmth coming from her. Soon my slice of cake was gone and I had gone for a second. For a moment I thought of going for a third but I knew the others wouldn't appreciate my greediness. After maybe half an hour of chatting and cake consumption there was no more cake and Kael approached me.

“Happy birthday kid,” Kael's gruff voice was surprisingly joyful today.

Kael pulled out something from his belt and I soon recognized it as a knife. A brand new shiny dagger to add to my arsenal. Unsheathing it the glint of steel met my eye as I admired the two sided blade. The hilt was a fine leather that didn't chafe against my skin. I hadn't held many knives in my life but even I could tell this was a work of art.

“Thank you Kael!” I exclaimed with genuine joy and a bright smile.

“You deserve it,” He patted me on the shoulder before returning to his chair.

"Oh are we giving presents now?” Scarlet excitedly asked as she saw Kael hand off his present to me.

From Scarlet's book bag she retrieved something small. Yet another smile lit up my face as I realized she had brought me a plushie! It was a shark! A bright blue and white shark with little teeth pointing out. As Scarlet approached me I snatched the thing and hugged it close to my stomach. It was an adorable little thing.

“I'm glad you like it,” Scarlet said as she smiled at me holding the plushie.

“Does it have a name?” I asked since my last plushie also had a name in that letter.

“Oh uh, her name is Blow-high,” Scarlet pronounced the name strangely.

“Blow-high? That's a weird name,” I looked towards the ditzy looking plushie with puzzlement.

“Well it's spelled b-l-a-h-a-j but the pronunciation is Swedish,” Scarlet held a finger to her chin while explaining like she had to remember how to spell it.

“Oh you have Sweden in your world too. That's cool,” I stated with a sense of wonder at how similar her and my worlds had been.

“I hope you like her Mikayla,” With another smile Scarlet sat down at her couch next to Damian.

“I already do,” I beamed, returning the smile that Scarlet was sharing with me.

Since everyone but Diantha had given me something, Damian finally rose from his corner with Scarlet holding a small rectangular box. “I also got a gift for you Mikayla.”

He gave off a horrible poker face with whatever his gift being, it was probably rushed. But I didn't really care, he was still thoughtful enough to actually get me something. That was better than most people I knew. Damian handed me the cardboard feeling box and I opened it to see a dress. A black and green dress in the same size as the one I was currently wearing. It was plain but it was something nice I could wear outside of my uniform. A few months ago I would have scoffed at being given something like this but I was already wearing a dress so why not give in to the temptation?

“I love it!” I squeed far too loudly and childishly but hey, I was celebrating my twenty-first birthday in the body of a little girl, all preconceived notions were tossed out the window at this point. “Thanks Damian.”

As I folded up my new dress I came to a horrifying realization. Did Diantha know my real age? When I first met her I gave her a made up name and I never corrected her on that, instead I just used the new name. I never told her my age though, she just assumed I was a child this whole time and I never corrected her. Then ever since I kept hiding the truth from her, she'd hate me. Diantha would hate me! I was a liar who got a birthday made for her because a nice lady pitied her.

“Mikayla, are you okay?” Suddenly my downward spiral was interrupted as Diantha put her arm around me and brought herself closer.

“I- I yeah, I'm fine. You just did so much for me and I don't know how to thank you,” I lied again using what little truths I could muster at the moment.

“That's good sweetie because you have one more gift waiting for you,” Diantha smiled with sunlike warmth as she pulled out a jewelry box from her pocket.

I eyed the box with trepidation, but in the end I took it, if I didn't accept it then Diantha would be disappointed. The box was ornate, made with indents and patterns difficult in this medieval era. It even had a felt-ish texture to it. Prying it open revealed two gold and emerald studded earrings. Immediately I could tell these were valuable, far more valuable than anything else in this room.

“You got me earrings?” I murmured at the femininity of the gift, however as I said that all chatter in the room stopped.

Everyone was staring now, not at me or Diantha but at the earrings inside the box. It was like their very existence constituted an explanation. Diantha seemed to have expected this to happen because she kept her smile on. I looked around at everyone's reactions, Lily wore a smug smirk, Damian and Scarlet held shocked expressions, and Kael had a surprisingly strong poker face at the moment.

“Diantha you should have told me about this,” Kael was the first to speak up and spoke like he was confronting his non-existent wife.

“As much as I would have liked to, you wouldn't have agreed to my gift if I asked, besides it's not your or my decision to make. It's Mikayla's,” Diantha looked towards the earrings then back at me again before speaking up with a soft gentle tone. “I know you don't know what these earrings mean so I'll explain. Usually when a girl reaches her tenth birthday their mother gets them a piece of jewelry. I noticed you didn't have any so I thought that I could give you something you didn't have.”

Diantha wanted me to be her daughter… Diantha wanted me to be her daughter! She wanted me of all people to be something like her child. But she didn't know the truth and I have to tell her now before she makes more mistakes in wanting me. “Diantha I'm twenty-one…” I said in a low voice as if I had killed someone again.

“I know you're a little old for a gift like this but I want you to have it,” Diantha said, pushing the box toward me. But she didn't say anything about me being twenty-one. 

She already knew and she still wanted me.

“I want it,” I muttered far too quickly but I didn't care anymore, “I want you to be my mom.”

Tears began pouring out of my eyes as I spoke the words I'd wanted to say for so, so long. I clutched the box of earrings close to me, the greatest gift I'd ever received from the best person I'd ever met. Diantha wasn't able to stop her eyes from watering either as she embraced me into a long warm hug. I don't know how long she held me there for but it was long enough that eventually the tears stopped and there was nothing left but dry salt.

“Let's get these earrings on your sweetie,” My new mom announced, unfortunately having to break away from our hug.

“Will it hurt?” I asked as if I wouldn't take the pain of earrings if it meant being with Diantha.

“Just for a moment,” Diantha said as she lifted one earring up. She leaned close to me before I felt a sudden but tiny amount of pain in my left ear then a numbing cold sensation. There was an aura of blue around my ear before the pain went away as if it was never there in the first place. Diantha quickly did the same for the other ear, it was easier the second time.

“Do you want to see your new earrings?” Diantha asked and I just nodded.

She led me by the hand as we entered my room. We passed by the other people in the room but none of them mattered at the moment, right now it was just me and Diantha. I gripped her hand harder as we approached the mirror. It wasn't like I was going to see something that wasn't there just hours ago. The only thing different would be two small studs in my ears, nothing less, nothing more. But it felt like so much more. 

Diantha reached towards the closet and opened it revealing two figures, a taller figure motherly holding the hand of a shorter, childish looking girl. In the girls' ears were two beautiful square emerald studs lined with gold. The way the emerald matched her hair and how the gold contrasted against her darker skin tone the earrings popped out of the visage. It was like the girl was born to wear her new earrings. My earrings.

“They look great…” I paused trying to find the right thing to call Diantha, calling her my mom this soon felt wrong, but calling her Diantha felt just as bad.

“I made sure they would, after all I made them myself,” Diantha gave me a look of satisfaction as she looked over me and my new jewelry.

“You're amazing. Thank you for… for everything,” there was too much to thank Diantha for so I settled on everything, there wasn't another word that fit.

“Anything for my daughter,” Diantha said with finality as she lowered her lips to my forehead before placing a kiss.

For a while I was silent and just let the words wash over me. Their meaning was impossible to miss. Tears nearly welled up again before I stifled them with a blink. I wouldn't cry again today, not when I needed to talk.

“I love you… Mom,” I looked up towards Diantha hoping I could smile as radiantly as she did

“I love you too sweetie,” Diantha said before embracing me again.

—

Hours passed as the party settled and guests left. By now it was midnight but one guest had stayed behind to be with her daughter a little while longer. Now the two slept peacefully in the black haired girl's bed. Both slept peacefully, happy to be in the presence of the other.