Chapter 956: Nothing Goes According to Expectations (10)

The ratings kept climbing higher and higher.

Inside HBS’s master control room, employees monitoring the live ratings smiled with satisfaction.

“As expected of NewBlack.”

“Seriously. Why did our network spend so long missing out on ratings this sweet?”

Even sipping plain iced Americanos somehow felt overwhelmingly sweet.

had just broken its highest ratings record in the last five years.

The assistant manager from the scheduling team happily picked up his phone.

“I need to let the Variety Director know. This is the highest Seojun ratings of the year.”

“I should text the production staff too. They’ve been asking for the live numbers nonstop.”

Ever since NewBlack appeared on the escape-room variety show <From This Moment, We> last year, this was their first major variety appearance in a while.

The HBS variety department had extremely high hopes for this broadcast.

One of the technical staff in master control said,

“Whenever they appeared on other networks, I used to be insanely jealous. But now that they’re on our side, it’s reassuring.”

Nobody openly talked about it, but before NewBlack started appearing on HBS again, the network had basically been drowning in tears.

After all, they’d once treated the group poorly during an end-of-year stage, and rival networks had reaped all the benefits afterward.

‘At least we’re getting along now.’

A technical staff member spoke again.

“TBC’s been weirdly quiet this time too. Producer Gu Jaeyoung transferred to Lemon and immediately exploded in popularity. I figured they’d make some kind of statement... but they’ve been acting like nothing happened.”

“I heard Ri Hyuk’s appearing on one of their shows.”

“Honestly, what can a network even do anymore?”

Normally, if a broadcasting company told an idol group, “You’re banned from our station,” it would be devastating.

But—

-If music shows won’t invite them? Isn’t that just a loss for the people refusing to invite Billboard #1 singers?

-If variety shows won’t invite them, they can just do New Universe.

-Banned from dramas? Guess they’ll go to NetPlus.

They were national idols who couldn’t realistically be damaged no matter what methods people used.

That was why TBC wasn’t making any major moves this time either.

Of course, rumors were spreading throughout the industry that the executives and president were furious.

Under normal circumstances, the network probably would’ve retaliated in petty fashion.

-No Lemon actors allowed in our dramas!

-No Lemon artists on our variety shows!

-No idol music show appearances!

But—

-Please, TBC! Retaliate already!

-Do it! Retaliate!

With rival terrestrial networks HBS and PBS practically clapping from the sidelines and egging them on, TBC’s executives eventually quieted down.

In the end, they merely released a formal statement expressing “regret over Producer Gu Jaeyoung’s baseless claims regarding reassignment.”

It felt like someone furiously about to smash their phone before remembering the price and instead tossing it gently onto a blanket.

“The times really have changed.”

“They’ve changed way too much. In just a few years.”

Unlike back in 2014 when NewBlack debuted, emerging platforms like MyTube and NetPlus were now becoming dominant.

On top of that, global superstars with worldwide fandoms had appeared.

The master control staff chatted while feeling firsthand how much weaker broadcasting stations had become compared to the past.

“If even the networks are like this, then what was that guy’s name again? Dongyochan? Children’s-song Chan?”

“The kid people mock as the number one rapper in Korean hip-hop? His surname was Bang, right? Apparently people remember it by thinking ‘bangjaha-da.’”

“What kind of confidence did that guy even have?”

The legendary incident that had supposedly caused personnel reshuffling at KNet became the latest topic among broadcasting employees.

Then, while watching NewBlack play with children on the monitor, one of the technical staff suddenly said,

“Speaking of Dongyochan, I heard there’s a children’s song on today’s show.”

“Really?”

The staff member nodded.

“The Seojun team said if there are children nearby, everyone should absolutely let them hear it. Apparently it’s incredibly effective.”

“Seriously?”

“I guess kids really like it.”

“I should text my wife. She’s probably watching with our kid right now. Apparently our child got super excited hearing the Supermarket Uncles were coming on.”

The married employees opened their messenger apps while speaking.

But while busily typing away, none of them even considered something important.

What exactly the production staff had truly meant by “effective for children”...

Part 1 of Seojun’s show ended, and Part 2 began immediately afterward.

Just like before, Part 2 alternated between scenes of Yeoul’s family and the other families.

At a kids café, a parent asked their child:

“Kids. Want to go see the Supermarket Uncles too?”

“Supermarket Uncles??”

The viewers who regularly watched the show smiled happily when they heard all the families would be gathering at Yeoul’s house later that evening for a fan meeting with NewBlack.

‘That’s fair.’

Yeoul’s family was popular, but many viewers loved the other children too.

The screen time had been distributed relatively evenly, but because so much focus naturally drifted toward NewBlack and Yeoul’s family, some viewers had felt slightly disappointed.

So hearing that all the families would gather together made them nod in satisfaction.

‘I hope Yubin gets to see NewBlack soon.’

Viewers smiled while imagining Yubin—already known as a NewBlack fan—meeting his favorite idols.

Then the scene switched back to Yeoul’s family.

“Oh my.”

The instant the scene changed, viewers swallowed hard.

“Look at that japchae.”

“Mom! Look at that japchae!”

“That looks delicious.”

It was because of the appearance of the japchae Biju had made.

The noodles glistened beautifully with sesame oil, piled high with meat garnish.

Even the spinach and carrots somehow looked unbelievably appetizing.

“Wow...”

It was enough to make even people who’d already eaten dinner crave late-night snacks.

And alongside it was marinated grilled beef.

-Is this Seojun’s show or a cooking show ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

-My diet failing is entirely NewBlack’s faultㅡㅡ I wasn’t gonna order chicken but now I have to seriously wow

-What do japchae and chicken even have to do with each other ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-(knife meme.jpg) Read the room???

-Whatever it’s NewBlack’s faultㅡㅡ But if I’m eating anyway, chicken probably tastes better with beer right?

-If you’re seriously dieting, never watch NewBlack contentㅇㅇ They’re always eating something

-The idol group where if you pause any self-content video, at least one member is guaranteed to be chewing ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

But unlike during the braised fish incident where viewers screamed for recipes, the reactions this time were relatively calm.

‘They’ll upload the recipe anyway.’

Then scenes of NewBlack playing with the children appeared.

“The kids already look exhausted.”

“Look at Junghyun. I’ve never seen him get that grimy before.”

Even Junghyun looked worn out because the children’s stamina was monstrous.

“This is so fun! Uncle, I’m having soooo much fun!”

“......”

“Waaaaaah!”

“......”

Whenever the children ran around, viewers burst into laughter at NewBlack’s utterly hollow expressions.

They genuinely looked culturally shocked.

The parents currently raising children smiled knowingly.

‘There is no answer. Heh heh.’

NewBlack desperately tried everything possible to get the children to sleep, but failed every time.

Which was completely natural.

Children were beings created specifically to torment adults.

The members finally unveiled their ultimate solution as the children clung to them like glue while giggling endlessly.

“Kids. Want to hear your uncles sing?”

Their final trump card—

Lullaby!

Wooju sat the children on the sofa and began playing the ukulele while singing the lullaby.

Viewers’ eyes widened.

‘The original composer singing Lullaby...!’

The magical background music that supposedly put children to sleep the instant they heard it.

The song people joked deserved the silver medal right behind Pororo if there were an award for Best Childcare Assistant of the Year.

And the song’s effect truly was astonishing.

[Zzzzz.......]

Sleeping so deeply that CGI bubbles coming out of their noses would’ve looked natural...

Was NewBlack.

[...]

Viewers exploded with laughter at Wooju’s dumbfounded expression.

-The ones supposed to sleep AREN’T sleeping ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-The kids DID fall asleep... just not the ones on TV ㅋㅋㅋ

-Ah they’re adorable ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-They look like exhausted penguins... which is why they should go to Antarcticaㅎㅎㅎㅎ

-The babies are so confused

-Wasn’t that supposed to be the special background music that instantly puts babies to sleep???

As if answering the viewers’ question, the children spoke.

“Uncle was too cool.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sleepy but not sleepy at all.”

Everyone immediately understood.

‘Well yeah. If the actual Supermarket Uncle sings right in front of you, of course you wouldn’t fall asleep.’

Children watching at home reacted the same way.

“Wooooow...”

The kids stared in admiration at the Supermarket Uncle singing gently.

Parents giggled watching them while Wooju looked warmly toward the exhausted members.

“Should we whisper together with Uncle?”

“Okay.”

The eldest member quietly whispered with the children so the exhausted younger members could sleep.

Even though he looked tired himself, affection dripped from the way he looked at them.

It was strangely heartwarming.

“They really are close.”

People smiled naturally at the nation’s idol group, who radiated a genuinely family-like atmosphere.

Yes, they were funny.

But one of the biggest reasons NewBlack remained so overwhelmingly popular was because of moments exactly like these.

-Wooju’s eyes are literally dripping honey

-The atmosphere is so nice ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

-This is seriously NewBlack’s best quality. They’re always chaotic but somehow still feel like family

-Please live together in the dorm until you’re 80ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

-Biju : (pleased)

It was a short scene, but it clearly showed Wooju’s feelings toward the members.

Viewers smiled warmly watching him try to let his younger members rest comfortably, even just a little.

But only for a moment.

The instant the exhausted members woke up, the children immediately rushed toward them again, destroying the peace.

“Hehe! Uncle, draw Pokémon for me! Pokémon!”

“Pew pew! Time for your shot!”

Everyone burst into laughter as NewBlack resumed suffering once again.

The members were completely overwhelmed by the children’s infinite stamina.

Then, upon hearing even more children from other families were about to arrive, the terrified members panicked—

And Wooju presented a solution.

“Looks like he’s making dolls.”

“Yeah?”

Inspired by children’s television programs, he quickly crafted a ventriloquist puppet using a baguette bought from the supermarket.

Unfortunately, Baguette Uncle’s appearance was deeply inappropriate.

“Waaaaaah!”

It was horrifying enough that even children watching TV became frightened.

Tomato eyes were stuck onto the baguette, creating something resembling a giant moth monster.

At first glance it almost looked cute.

But somehow terrifying at the same time.

-Even adults would find that scary ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-Why doesn’t he understand what’s scary about it ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-I can’t watch right now but what does “scary bread” even mean?? How can bread be scary???

-(Baguette Uncle.jpg)

-I’m sleeping with Mom tonight...

Eventually NewBlack changed directions and decided to make a rabbit puppet instead, officially preparing for the Supermarket Uncle fan meeting.

“Looks like he’s making another children’s song too.”

“He’s writing songs again.”

At this point, even the general public accepted this kind of thing naturally.

While viewers watched Sun Wooju casually creating songs out of nowhere yet again, the scene shifted to the other families.

Families finishing their daily routines and heading toward Yeoul’s house.

And then—

At last, the long-awaited Rabbit Uncle appeared, sending everyone into hysterics.

-What kind of idol does ventriloquism ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-He’s actually good at it too

-Did Wooju ever work on children’s shows before????

-This is the aura only experienced professionals can have... except he definitely has no experience

-#1 idol suspiciously lacking any visible career history

-No but he’s genuinely good at this??ㅋㅋㅋㅋ

Wooju skillfully performed ventriloquism while introducing “Rabbit Uncle!” to the children, while the members wore animal headbands.

“I’m Junghyun Bear.”

“I’m Ri Hyuk Kitty.”

People clapped in delight at Junghyun and Ri Hyuk wearing bear and cat headbands—

Then subtitles suddenly appeared on screen.

[If you have children, please let them hear this children’s song!]

Parents watching TV smiled and called over their children.

“Supermarket Uncle’s going to sing.”

“A song?”

“Yep. He’s going to sing a children’s song.”

NewBlack’s children’s song , created with the wish that every child in the world could be happy.

The parents sat down beside their children with smiles.

“Should we sing the children’s song together too?”

“Okay!”

But at that moment—

None of them realized.

They absolutely should not have done that.

Children stared blankly at the TV.

“Mom! Mom! It’s Rabbit Uncle...!”

“Rabbit Uncle...”

At an age where the boundary between fantasy and reality remained faint—

The children became completely immersed watching Wooju speak with the cloth rabbit puppet in his hand.

‘Rabbit Uncle from Rabbit Land...!’

The children’s eyes sparkled brightly.

Wooju explained it was a world filled with fluffy pink clouds where rabbits and children lived together happily.

Then Rabbit Uncle, who spread happiness to children everywhere, asked:

“Now then, should we all try the dance together?”

“Yes!”

“Yeeees!”

Children and parents all across the country energetically answered while learning the choreography from the TV.

The movements were simple enough that even the parents unconsciously followed along, shrugging left and right.

Then Wooju spoke to the puppet.

“Rabbit Uncle. I think the children are all ready now. Should we sing together too?”

“What a wonderful idea!”

“Kids. Are you ready?”

“Yes!”

The children on TV answered energetically while children at home nodded enthusiastically too.

Then the toddlers wobbled upright from their seats.

The moment the children started bouncing their arms excitedly—

The song began.

Karaoke subtitles appeared on the TV.

『Uncle Bunny』

Composed by: Rabbit Uncle

Lyrics by: Rabbit Uncle, Singing Cat, Cookie Baking Deer, Dancing Bear, Baby (21 years old)

Soon the lyrics rolled along the bottom like karaoke text while NewBlack began the choreography.

Hop hop bunny dance!

Where are we going?

The animal uncles looked around dramatically with playful expressions.

Sparkly sparkly sunshine

It dazzles my eyes

This time they pretended to shield their eyes from sunlight while singing.

The adult viewers smiled.

“The song’s nice.”

“They made it really well.”

Adults didn’t know much about children’s songs, but for something created on the spot, it sounded good.

Pleasant to listen to.

But that was only the adults’ perspective.

To children, the song felt completely different.

“!”

“!!”

The repeating rhythm and melody.

Children naturally loved repetition.

These were beings who could watch the same Pororo episode over and over and over again even after already seeing it countless times.

The catchy melody repeated again and again, making children’s eyes widen.

‘...!’

And the melody kept rising and falling energetically.

The song naturally made children hop around like rabbits without realizing it.

“Stretch left!”

“Stretch right!”

The children excitedly flailed their arms wildly while following the dance.

Some clapped.

Some laughed watching another child fall over on TV, then promptly fell themselves.

‘Rabbit Uncle!’

The children stared brightly at Rabbit Uncle wriggling atop Wooju’s hand.

Listening to the song genuinely felt like hopping around grassy fields together with Rabbit Uncle.

Watching this, parents smiled warmly.

‘...Cute.’

‘Thank you, Wooju.’

Then Rabbit Uncle’s song ended on television.

The children on TV erupted into thunderous cheers, and children watching at home clapped enthusiastically too.

Afterward, the smiles never left the parents’ faces.

‘This is nice.’

They watched their children bouncing around happily while calling for Rabbit Uncle with affectionate smiles.

Eventually, after Seojun’s show ended and parents began preparing their children for bed—

“Mom.”

“Hm?”

“I want to see Rabbit Uncle again.”

“Right now...?”

“Yes.”

The determined expressions on their sons’ and daughters’ faces made parents’ hearts sink.

The children’s eyes sparkled intensely.

‘N-no!’

That expression clearly meant this wouldn’t end easily.

Company cafeteria.

Our group and the company staff gathered around the table erupted into cheers.

[Real-Time Search Rankings]

#1 Rabbit Uncle

#2 Rabbit

#3 Biju Japchae

Jiho shouted,

“Wow! Rabbit Uncle beat Biju Japchae!”

“My god...”

Its power was so overwhelming it had surpassed even Biju’s cooking.

Most likely, the children’s song had instantly reached #1 in real-time searches because kids wanted to hear it again after the broadcast ended.

The live reactions were overwhelmingly positive.

“Should we prepare the live broadcast first?”

“Let’s do it.”

At Ri Hyuk’s words, the members and I headed toward a quieter corner of the cafeteria.

Each member put on their animal headbands.

And I slipped Rabbit Uncle onto my hand.

“Should we start the MyTube live?”

It was a live stream we’d prepared just in case got a strong reaction.

The song itself had turned out really well, and we’d even filmed a music video for it separately.

But releasing it immediately tonight felt a little off.

Dropping it the instant the broadcast ended would’ve made it feel too money-hungry somehow.

Like the original purpose—a song made for children—would instantly become overly commercialized.

So we’d decided to watch reactions for a few days first, then go, “Thanks to everyone’s support... ta-da!”

Instead, if reactions were good tonight, we’d surprise viewers with a MyTube live event featuring Rabbit Uncle.

Junghyun said,

“I think Souffle will love this too. The animal headband clips are all over social media right now.”

“Really?”

“Whoa, they really are. Animal headbands really are the best.”

These headbands were also extremely useful during fan signings whenever we accidentally messed up.

-“Hello! Mummy Hotteok!”

-“It’s MIAri Hotteok, Jiho...”

-“I’ll wear the headband.”

No matter how upset Souffle fans were, the moment we wore headbands and acted cute, their lips always twitched.

This live was partly to sing the children’s song casually—

And partly to show Souffle some cute sides of us again after a while.

“No.”

“Hm?”

“Not after a while. Always. We’re always cute.”

“That’s right.”

The members exchanged satisfied {N•o•v•e•l•i•g•h•t} smiles before turning on the MyTube live.

The moment we set the title using keywords likely to attract people searching for “Rabbit Uncle” videos on MyTube—

Viewers poured in instantly.

The audience count exploded exponentially while we waved at the camera and danced as Rabbit Uncle.

“Hello!”

Then a hesitant comment appeared.

-Kids...

“Yes!”

-Please release the music video already..

“......”

And suddenly the comments exploded.

-It’s nighttime and this thing is tormenting mothers everywhere... my kid’s demanding Rabbit Uncle RIGHT NOW

-P-please release the song quicklyㅠㅠ

-This isn’t Rabbit Uncle. It’s Rabbit Hell

-I don’t care about anything else but please release the MV early..

Parents stared off into the distance while pouring out their complaints.

The staff burst into laughter while we bowed deeply toward the camera.

“We’re sorry......”

We weren’t entirely sure why, but it somehow felt like we needed to apologize.

I turned toward the rabbit puppet.

“Uncle should apologize too.”

“It became a disaster unintentionally! I’m sorry!”

The adults in the comment section burst into laughter.

And thus ended the MyTube live that would lead to a post titled:

[Controversy Over Rookie Idol Rabbit Uncle’s Personality]

appearing online the next day.