Chapter 440 - The Truth Is Out

Chapter 440: Chapter 440 - The Truth Is Out

For the next few days, Zac tried harder.

Roxie noticed it without wanting to.

He came home as soon as football allowed it, texted whenever treatment or film delayed him and stopped adding extra things to days that were already too long. When he was home, he stayed close to her. He asked about cheer, remembered when her skills evaluation was and kept conversations going even when Roxie barely gave him enough to work with.

A few weeks ago, she would have loved every second of it.

Now she couldn’t stop wondering if it had something to do with the kiss.

She knew that wasn’t completely fair. Zac had already been trying before everything happened at Dylan’s house. Football really was eating most of his life, and Roxie had watched enough practices to know he wasn’t exaggerating about how exhausted he was. Still, something had changed. Zac was home more often, Dylan wasn’t around and neither of them mentioned his name.

That silence bothered her almost as much as anything else.

Roxie had expected Dylan to show up eventually. She had expected him to call Zac or come over or appear after practice like he always did, especially after telling Roxie so confidently that she should ask Zac to stay away from him and see what happened.

But days passed and Dylan stayed away.

Zac never explained why.

Roxie never asked.

She had already spent too much time wondering whether Zac being home more meant he was trying to fix things with her, whether he felt guilty for hiding the kiss or whether he and Dylan had simply stopped talking for a while after their argument. Every answer her mind created only led to another question, and she was tired of living inside questions.

She kept everything from Karen and Angela too.

That bothered her in a different way.

Their group chat continued like nothing in Roxie’s life had changed. Karen complained about something Mason had done, Angela sent pictures and random updates, and Roxie answered just enough that neither of them asked whether something was wrong. Every time her fingers hovered over the keyboard, she remembered the promise they made to each other.

They were supposed to stop hiding serious things.

No more waiting until a disaster was already over before telling the others. No more deciding alone what was too embarrassing, too painful or too complicated to share.

Roxie knew she was breaking that promise.

She simply couldn’t make herself tell them.

Because she knew exactly what the conversation would become.

Dylan kissed Zac.

Zac pushed him away.

Zac never told me.

The first two made Zac innocent.

The last one complicated everything.

Karen and Angela would remember that part. Even if Roxie explained that Zac had rejected Dylan immediately, even if she defended him and told them the kiss meant nothing to him, they would still know he had come home afterward and kept it from her.

Roxie didn’t want their opinion of Zac changing while she still hadn’t figured out what she thought herself.

So she carried it alone.

There was something painfully familiar about that.

She had spent too much of her childhood learning that sometimes loving someone meant keeping quiet because speaking could change everything. With her mother, there had always been another reason Roxie should understand. Claire was sick. Claire was trying. Claire loved her even when her actions made that love difficult to recognize. Roxie had spent years telling herself that reasons mattered because the alternative was admitting that sometimes somebody could love you and still hurt you badly enough that love didn’t fix it.

Zac wasn’t Claire.

Roxie knew that.

She hated that her brain could even put them close enough together for the comparison to happen.

Zac had shown up for her too many times to count. He had chosen her loudly, stubbornly and sometimes to the point of making his own life harder. He had never made Roxie wonder whether he loved her.

Until now.

And even now, love itself wasn’t what she doubted.

That was what made everything so confusing.

She knew Zac loved her.

She believed Dylan when he said Zac pushed him away.

She believed Zac didn’t want Dylan.

Yet something inside her had pulled back anyway.

The first time Zac tried taking things further, Roxie told him she was tired. He stopped immediately and kissed her forehead before going to sleep.

The second time, she let him kiss her longer. She even wanted him for a while before the memory came back and made her tense beneath his hands. Zac noticed and stopped without making a big deal out of it.

By the third time, Roxie could see the confusion beginning to show on his face.

He still respected it.

He was simply starting to look hurt.

On the fourth night, Zac came home before nine carrying dinner. He looked exhausted enough that Roxie expected him to eat and fall asleep on the couch, but instead he stayed beside her and talked.

More than usual.

It took Roxie a while to realize he was trying to fill the silence between them.

He told her about practice, about some argument during film and about a receiver getting blamed for a route he swore someone else had messed up. When Roxie answered with only a few words, Zac shifted to cheer. He remembered the date of her evaluation, asked whether she wanted help conditioning during the weekend and even remembered the stunt she had told him about.

Roxie listened while something heavy settled in her chest.

He was trying so hard to reach her.

And she was sitting three feet away wondering why the truth had been the one thing he hadn’t given her.

By the time they went to bed, Roxie was tired enough that she hoped they would simply sleep.

Zac settled beside her without immediately touching her. For several minutes he stayed on his side, and Roxie could feel the space between their bodies even though the mattress was barely wide enough for it.

Eventually his hand rested lightly against her waist.

His fingers moved once against her shirt, almost asking instead of assuming.

Roxie stared into the darkness.

Then she turned toward him.

The relief that moved across Zac’s face was small, but Roxie saw it.

He kissed her.

Roxie kissed him back because she wanted to.

That was the part that made everything so difficult. Her anger hadn’t changed what her body knew about him. She could spend an entire day avoiding his eyes and still miss his mouth the moment he kissed her. She could hate the secret he kept and still want the familiar weight of his hand against her waist.

Zac kissed her again and Roxie let herself move closer.

For a while, the thoughts stopped.

His hand moved into her hair while his mouth stayed slow against hers, almost careful after all the times she had pulled away. When Roxie responded, Zac relaxed and pulled her closer until she could feel the warmth of his body against hers.

She missed him.

She hated how much she missed him when he had been beside her every night.

Zac shifted over her slightly and kissed her deeper. His hand moved along her side, and Roxie let it happen until his mouth left hers and moved toward her jaw.

The image came back instantly.

Dylan leaning forward.

Dylan’s face against Zac’s.

Roxie turned away.

"Stop."

Zac stopped immediately.

He stayed still for a second before moving away from her and sitting back against the mattress.

Roxie stared toward the wall, trying to get rid of the image again.

Then she heard Zac rub both hands over his face.

The movement irritated her.

She turned. "What?"

Zac looked at her, and this time he didn’t hide the frustration quickly enough.

"I’m trying really hard here, Rox. I know this isn’t just about sex, so please don’t turn it into that, but something has been wrong with you for days and you keep acting like I’m supposed to figure it out without you telling me."

Roxie sat up and pulled the blanket around herself. "You sound pissed because I stopped you. Am I not allowed?"

Zac gave a hollow laugh and stared at her like he couldn’t believe that was what she heard. "Allowed? You’re making it sound like I was forcing you."

Roxie opened her mouth but stopped herself.

Zac’s jaw tightened. "I’m frustrated because this keeps happening and you won’t tell me why. I stop every time you ask. You know I do. But you barely talk to me anymore, and every time I ask what’s wrong you tell me you’re tired or emotional or fine. I’ve been trying to fix this and I don’t even know what I’m fixing."

"I have my period."

Zac stared at her for a second, his jaw tightening even more. "I was not kissing you because I wanted to have sex."

"Could’ve fooled me."

Her eyes dropped deliberately toward his pants.

Color climbed into Zac’s face, partly embarrassment and partly frustration. "That’s my natural fucking reaction when I kiss the girl I love."

Something about that sentence broke through everything Roxie had spent days holding inside.

She looked at him.

"Was that also your reaction when Dylan kissed you?"

Zac stopped moving.

For a second neither of them breathed.

"What?"

Roxie stared at his face and felt the anger rise almost immediately because there was no confusion there. He knew exactly what she was talking about.

"What?" she repeated bitterly. "You thought I wouldn’t know about that? How long were you planning to hide it, Zac?"

His expression changed from shock to something much more guarded. "How do you know?"

A bitter laugh escaped her. "That’s what you want to know?"

"Roxie, I’m asking because I never told anyone."

"I was there."

His face changed completely.

The frustration disappeared.

"What?"

"I followed you that night because I didn’t want to leave our fight like that. I got there while everything was happening outside. I saw his dad. I saw you get punched. I stayed after everyone left, and when I went toward the door because I was going to tell you I was there, I saw Dylan kiss you."

Zac stared at her.

"You were there the whole time?"

"Long enough."

"Why didn’t you come inside?"

Roxie looked at him sharply. "Because I saw my boyfriend kissing someone. What did you want me to do, get a front row seat for the rest of it?"

"I wasn’t kissing him."

"Does that matter?"

Zac went quiet.

Roxie hated the way her eyes started burning again.

"I pushed him away."

"I waited for you to tell me."

That stopped him.

The words came easier now that she had finally said the thing that mattered most.

"When you came home, I kept waiting. You told me what happened with his family. You told me why you were late. You apologized for our fight and told me you would never cheat on me, and the whole time I kept thinking any second you were going to tell me Dylan kissed you."

Zac looked down.

That hurt worse than if he had argued.

"I should’ve told you."

Roxie blinked quickly. "Yeah."

"I was going to."

She looked at him.

Zac seemed to hear how weak it sounded too because he rubbed a hand over his face before continuing. "I don’t know when. I just knew that night wasn’t the time. Everything had already gone to shit. Dylan was completely fucked up, you and I had just had that fight, and the kiss meant nothing to me. I pushed him away, we fought and I dealt with it. I thought telling you right then would only hurt you over something I already knew wasn’t going anywhere."

Roxie listened quietly.

She could understand every part of what he was saying.

That didn’t make it feel better.

"You knew it meant nothing because you knew what happened after," she said. "I didn’t."

Zac looked at her.

"I didn’t get to see you push him away. All I got was Dylan kissing you, then you coming home like nothing happened."

"I wasn’t pretending nothing happened."

"It felt like you were."

Zac looked down again before admitting, "I didn’t want it creating more friction between you and Dylan."

Roxie laughed.

There was nothing funny about it, but she couldn’t help it.

"We already got into a fight."

Zac’s head lifted.

"You talked to him?"

"He asked me to meet him."

"And you went?"

The edge in Zac’s voice came back quickly enough that Roxie felt her own anger flare.

"Yes, Zac, I went. He knew I saw you, and apparently he was the one willing to tell me what happened."

Zac looked away.

Roxie could see him swallowing whatever response had first come to him.

"When?"

"A couple days ago."

He looked back at her and reached for her hand.

Roxie stood before he could touch her and moved toward the other side of the room.

"Don’t you dare touch me."

Zac’s hand dropped.

For a second the hurt on his face was so obvious that Roxie almost felt guilty, but she was too angry to let that stop her.

Zac slowly stood from the bed. "Is this why you’ve been cold to me?"

"Why? Is there something else I should know?"

His hands moved over his face and then down to the back of his neck. "No. Fuck, Roxie. There’s nothing else. I hated what happened. I already told Dylan exactly what I thought about it."

He stepped toward her.

Roxie stepped back.

Zac stopped immediately.

His eyes dropped to the space her foot had created between them before lifting back to her face.

"What do you want me to do?" His voice had lost most of its anger now and sounded almost helpless. "I never wanted Dylan. I need you to believe that."

"I do."

Zac stared at her, clearly surprised.

Roxie felt another tear slip down her cheek but left it there.

"I believe you pushed him away. I believe you were pissed. I believe you love me."

The tension in Zac’s shoulders loosened slightly, but the confusion in his face only deepened.

"Then why does it feel like you’re condemning me for something I didn’t even do?"

Roxie hated him for that question.

Not because it was unfair.

Because part of her knew exactly what he meant.

Zac hadn’t kissed Dylan.

Zac hadn’t cheated.

Zac had rejected him.

And Roxie was still standing across the room unable to let him touch her.

She hated that none of those facts erased what hurt.

"Why did you hide it from me?"

Zac opened his mouth, then closed it again. His eyes moved away from her while one hand settled against his waist.

For several seconds he said nothing.

Roxie waited.

When he finally looked at her again, something about his expression made her stomach tighten.

"I was afraid you’d think Dylan still wanted me."

Roxie stared at him.

Then she laughed.

It came out broken and wrong, and before she could stop it the laugh turned into tears.

Zac immediately stepped toward her.

Roxie held one hand up.

He stopped.

"Who would’ve thought I was right, right?"

"Babe..."

"Don’t fucking call me that."

Zac’s face fell.

"I’m sorry."

Roxie wiped angrily beneath her eyes and looked directly at him. "Are you sorry you didn’t tell me, or are you sorry because I found out the truth?"

Zac lowered his hands.

His shoulders dropped like whatever strength had been holding him upright had left all at once.

For a long moment he only looked at her.

Then he said quietly, "He’s my best friend, Rox. I can’t just leave him alone."