Chapter 1172 - 1199: Early Onboarding (2)

Chapter 1172: Chapter 1199: Early Onboarding (2)

He’d actually become this cowardly.

He needed some external force to decisively cut off this entanglement with her.

Windsor Myres let her thoughts run wild; suddenly she understood something and froze on the spot.

She felt that Camden River seemed to be serious.

No, no, no, that’s not right.

She felt a mess inside and didn’t know when things had started to go off the rails. Maybe it was because Camden River’s parents showed up too suddenly, his torn, hesitant attitude pissed her off, and in her irritation she dragged Ali Harris into it, then ran into Tong Tong and him both getting hurt.

All these things came together at once, so she fell apart.

She’d originally just wanted to be in a relationship, but now, this love had already been mixed with all sorts of vexing things; and they still had to live in the real world, could only face it and not run away, so there was no going back.

No going back?

Windsor Myres sat in her seat, the whole person a little stunned.

"Give me a cigarette."

After quite a while, she lifted her eyes and glanced at Ali Harris, speaking in a flat voice.

Ali Harris was taken aback. "You can’t smoke right now."

"What’s the big deal about one cigarette?" Windsor Myres was extremely irritable and pushed him, "Did you bring any? If you did then hurry up and give me one, stop talking nonsense."

Ali Harris looked torn, but still passed the pack and lighter over.

To tell the truth—

He actually didn’t want the child in Windsor Myres’s belly to be born.

So every time he spoke up to stop her, he had no real confidence, and very quickly compromised.

Windsor Myres lit the cigarette.

She held it between her fingers and took a drag, and very quickly thought of Camden River again.

Her heart hurt, and she hated him too.

Back at school everything had clearly been fine at the beginning; she really didn’t understand how things had ended up like this now.

When they first got together, she thought this kind of thing was perfectly normal, but unfortunately Camden River didn’t see it that way. He was very old-fashioned, always thinking this kind of thing should be on the wedding night after graduation.

The first time Camden River got drunk, his mind wasn’t clear, his emotions burst out, but once he sobered up, he put a heavy mental shackle on himself because of that incident; whether before he went abroad or after he came back, he saw her as a responsibility, and the original genuine feelings were diminished.

Sex that comes too early and out of the blue is terrifying.

Especially when it happens beyond one’s control.

In his bones, Camden River had a streak of machoism; he didn’t like being in a subordinate position in a relationship. The sweetest time between them was exactly when she was first tasting what love felt like, obedient and docile.

But—

Was that obedient, docile person really her?

As Windsor Myres thought and thought, she suddenly felt a little muddled.

Her temperament had always been domineering and high-spirited; when she was in the mood she was willing to bow her head and play small, but that wasn’t forever. Since she was little she’d only yield to softness, not hardness; whenever others told her how she should be, she would subconsciously go the opposite way, even rack her brains to provoke the other side, savoring the joy of victory.

Now she had, as she wished, successfully angered him, yet she didn’t feel any joy.

Just deeply annoyed.

The more Windsor Myres thought, the more irritable she became.

She even—

Felt that even that bit of confidence she’d had earlier was gone.

She felt that Camden River might not actually love her, or rather, that he had never accepted the truest, truest version of her from start to finish. The one he fell in love with was only that side of her that acted weak and cutesy, that made him feel satisfied and at ease.

That wasn’t the real her.

Or rather—

That was only a small part of her.

The real her was the one who grew up in the Myres Family, the her who was out for her own gain even at others’ expense, the her who was accustomed to fighting and competing, the her who was extremely self-centered, always sizing up the situation and planning for herself, the her who refused to show weakness in any emotional contest.