Chapter 329: Everyone Is Spider-Man Except Peter (EC)

"What the hell is going on?!"

Peter Parker was starting to think he’d gone insane.

Why?

First, a disgusting red-and-black bodysuit had inexplicably appeared inside his closet. Then, when he tried to throw the thing away, he discovered that everyone on the street was wearing the exact same fucking suit and swinging through the sky.

"Oh my God! I have to be dreaming!"

Peter stared at the scene outside, his pupils contracting sharply.

"Hey, Parker! What are you doing down there?!"

Just as Peter was beginning to panic, a girl’s voice called out from above. A figure in a red Spider-Man suit descended from the sky, hanging upside down from a strand of webbing.

"If you keep wasting time, we’re going to be late..."

The Spider-Man hanging in front of him apparently knew Peter and kept urging him to hurry.

"Who are you?!"

Peter stared suspiciously at the girl in the red suit.

"Oh, Parker! You seriously don’t recognize me?!"

The girl burst out laughing before pulling off her mask.

"Parker! It’s me, MJ!"

The girl revealed a pretty face and smiled at Peter.

Unfortunately, because she was still hanging upside down, that smile looked incredibly creepy from Peter’s perspective.

"Oh my God..."

Peter nearly had a breakdown when he realized the Spider-Person hanging in front of him was his beloved MJ.

"Parker! Hurry up! We’re seriously going to be late!"

Just as Peter was panicking, another figure in red descended from above.

This Spider-Person was visibly much heavier than everyone else.

"Uh..."

"Let me guess. You’re Ned, right?"

Peter stared at the boy before him. His belly was so large that the tight Spider-Man suit could barely contain it, making him look absolutely ridiculous.

He hesitated before asking the question.

"Oh my God! Parker! You really are my best friend!"

The heavyset boy hung one-handed from a web attached to a creaking streetlight while using his other hand to pull off his mask.

Sure enough...

It was Ned.

"WTF..."

"What the hell happened to the world?!"

Peter was completely lost.

He was about to lose his mind.

All he’d done was go to sleep, and somehow everyone in the world had turned into a Spider-Person swinging through the sky.

Even that loudmouth from the news had become one!

It was terrifying!

"Peter Parker, let me guess! You still haven’t mutated today, have you, you miserable little punk?!"

On an enormous screen mounted to a skyscraper, a bald J. Jonah Jameson screamed directly into the camera.

Naturally, he was also wearing a red Spider-Man suit while hanging upside down.

Now that Jameson himself had gone from an ordinary human into a Spider-Person, his daily target of abuse had changed from Spider-Man to Peter Parker.

A truly magnificent development.

"Why?! Why won’t you leave me alone even now?!"

Peter stared speechlessly at Jameson on the screen above and complained.

Then he suddenly froze.

"Wait... Why did I say ’even now’?"

Peter fell into thought.

HUM!

Just as Peter was puzzling over that strange feeling, a golden portal slowly opened beside him.

"Peter Parker?"

A sorcerer wearing a red cloak stepped through.

Peter silently thanked every god he could think of.

At least this sorcerer wasn’t wearing a red Spider-Man suit.

The instant the man emerged from the portal, his eyes locked onto Peter.

"That’s me..."

Peter nodded.

"Come with me."

The sorcerer grabbed Peter and began pulling him toward the portal.

"Hey! You’re not taking him anywhere!"

MJ and Ned simultaneously fired webs, blocking the sorcerer’s path.

"..."

The sorcerer stared at the three teenagers for a moment before sighing, apparently resigning himself to something.

"Fine. All three of you can come."

He waved his hand.

Two additional portals immediately appeared.

"Huh?!"

Before MJ, Ned, or Peter could react, the three portals swallowed them and transported them to the summit of a remote mountain.

"Welcome to Kamar-Taj. The Wi-Fi password is written on the wall, connect yourselves."

The man casually addressed the three teenagers after arriving.

"Where are we?!"

MJ, Ned, and Peter stared around at their surroundings in shock.

"I’m Doctor Strange, and as for where you are, I literally just told you."

"Now let’s talk about your problem."

Doctor Strange looked helplessly at the three of them.

"Our problem?"

The three teenagers looked at him.

"Yes, your problem."

"The truth is, you’re in serious trouble."

"This all started because Mr. Parker got tired of being Spider-Man and wanted everyone in the world to forget that he was Spider-Man."

Doctor Strange explained what had happened.

"Wait, wait..."

"You’re saying I’m Spider-Man?!"

Peter froze.

He understood that everyone else clearly wasn’t supposed to be Spider-Man, but he’d never once considered that he himself was supposed to be Spider-Man.

"Yes. You’re Spider-Man."

Doctor Strange nodded.

"You’re saying Peter Parker is Spider-Man too?!"

MJ and Ned exclaimed simultaneously.

"More accurately, Peter Parker was supposed to be the only Spider-Man in this world."

Doctor Strange frowned and corrected them.

"Then what are we?!"

MJ and Ned immediately asked.

"Well..."

"Actually, when Peter Parker originally came to my Sanctum asking for help, I happened to have a guest visiting."

"That guest possesses extraordinary power. Basically, no matter what he wants to happen, all he has to do is lightly snap his fingers like this, and reality itself obeys him."

Doctor Strange sighed helplessly.

"You mean the Infinity Stones..."

Ned and MJ froze.

They knew about the Infinity Stones.

They also knew what Thanos had done with them.

"No."

"He wasn’t using the power of the Infinity Stones. I’m saying he personally possesses that kind of power."

"After hearing Peter Parker’s problem, he simply snapped his fingers."

"And everyone in the world forgot Peter Parker was Spider-Man."

"Including Peter Parker himself!"

Doctor Strange clutched his aching head.

"Oh..."

Peter frowned.

He finally understood what Doctor Strange meant.

"But why did the world turn into this?!"

MJ pressed him.

"That’s exactly what I’m getting to..."

"Unfortunately, after seeing what my friend had done to the world, I couldn’t stop myself from complaining to him."

"So..."

Doctor Strange stopped there, looking utterly exhausted.

"So your friend snapped his fingers again right in front of you!"

"And this time, he turned everyone in the world except Parker into Spider-Man?!"

MJ finally understood.

Her eyes widened.

She had only one thought.

This sorcerer’s friend was way too fucking impulsive!

"That’s exactly what happened..."

Doctor Strange sighed helplessly and nodded.

"Frankly, if Peter Parker merely forgot that he was Spider-Man, restoring those memories would be child’s play for me."

"But the problem is that now the entire world, perhaps even the entire universe, has been altered."

"That’s beyond what I can fix."

Doctor Strange looked utterly defeated.

Meanwhile, deep in space...

"Don’t let them get away!"

The Guardians of the Galaxy, all dressed in red Spider-Man suits, swung wildly through space on strands of webbing.

"Run! Hurry!"

Their enemies fled for their lives in complete panic.

"Foolish mortals!"

Farther out in the depths of the cosmos, one of the mighty Celestials observed all things from above.

He sneered contemptuously.

Then he suddenly fired a strand of webbing from his hand, attached it to the nearest planet, and swung away.

"This universe has become so boring..."

At a plane of existence accessible only to gods, the great cosmic entity Eternity hung upside down in the heavens and sighed in boredom.

"It’s not that bad..."

His counterpart, Infinity, was hanging upside down beside him and smiled at Eternity.

"..."

Back on Earth, Doctor Strange, who had escaped the transformation because he had been standing beside Jovian when it happened, felt completely numb.

Through his mystical senses, he could perceive countless dimensional entities hanging upside down across their own realms, casually chatting with one another.

"What the hell..."

Doctor Strange covered his face.

The scene was so absurd he couldn’t bear to look at it.

Meanwhile, elsewhere...

"My children... My children..."

The Scarlet Witch looked increasingly unhinged.

She wanted her children back.

Following her obsession, she eventually arrived at the Sanctum Sanctorum where Doctor Strange had been staying.

However, when the Scarlet Witch pushed open the doors, she found a man in a white suit casually playing with some building blocks inside.

"You are..."

The Scarlet Witch froze before questioning him.

"Tell me your wish, ma’am."

The man in the white suit spoke immediately after seeing her.

"My wish?"

The Scarlet Witch, who had been teetering on the edge of darkness, froze.

Her eyes softened slightly.

"I want you to bring my two children back to life!"

The Scarlet Witch looked at the man.

"Impossible."

The man immediately told her it couldn’t be done.

"Why?!"

The flames of rage immediately returned to the Scarlet Witch’s eyes.

"Because for me to resurrect your children, you would first need to actually have children who died."

"You don’t have any dead children, so how am I supposed to resurrect them?"

"Now, if what you want is for me to bring back two constructs created from your thoughts, that’s different. I can absolutely do that."

The man in the white suit lightly snapped his fingers.

SNAP!

In an instant, the two boys Wanda had created during the events of WandaVision appeared before her.

"My children?!"

Wanda froze when she saw them.

"Mom, are we really your children?"

"Did you actually give birth to us?"

The two boys walked up to Wanda and took her hands.

"Of course. Of course..."

Wanda nodded repeatedly.

"Of course not."

The man in the white suit immediately contradicted her.

"Why are you being so cruel?!"

Wanda pulled the two boys behind her protectively and glared at the man.

"I’m only telling you the truth."

"Your boyfriend, Vision, is an android. He couldn’t get you pregnant."

"These two children were essentially Chaos Magic wearing human bodies."

"If I were you, I’d find a normal boyfriend, get married, and have children the normal way."

The man in the white suit walked toward Wanda as he spoke.

"You’re lying. I don’t believe you..."

Wanda pulled the two boys into her arms and retreated into the comforting fantasy inside her own mind.

"You’re really confused..."

"Do you remember what I just told you? I said I can’t resurrect something that never actually died, but I can resurrect someone who truly died."

The man in the white suit lightly snapped his fingers again.

SNAP!

The next instant, a young man with short silver hair appeared beside Wanda.

"You..."

Wanda stared at the silver-haired young man.

Then tears began rolling down her cheeks.

"Feels like I just woke up from a really long dream."

"Either way, how about welcoming me back, Wanda?"

Quicksilver stepped forward and pulled his sister into a huge hug.

"See what I mean?"

"I can resurrect someone who actually died."

"But if they never died in the first place, how exactly am I supposed to resurrect them?"

"The problem was your wish, Witch."

The man in the white suit calmly stood before the Scarlet Witch.

"I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I was confused..."

The Scarlet Witch watched her brother Quicksilver return to life before her eyes and immediately began apologizing to the man.

"Could you... help me one more time?"

"I want my husband, Vision, back."

Wanda looked hopefully at the man in the white suit.

"’Resurrect’ isn’t really the right word."

"Vision himself isn’t exactly dead. He simply disappeared along with the Stone."

"Of course, I could create another Vision for you, but that would mean some other Wanda in another universe would have to lose hers."

The man in the white suit considered the problem before looking at Wanda.

"Why does the world have to be so cruel..."

Wanda understood what he meant.

She touched her cheek as more tears rolled down her face.

"Of course, if what you really want is simply two children..."

"I can’t resurrect them, because you never actually had children who died."

"But creating two children for you would be ridiculously easy."

Jovian thought for a moment before looking at Wanda.

"Huh?!"

Wanda wiped away her tears and stared at the man in the white suit with wide, hopeful eyes.

"Oh, right. I never introduced myself."

"My name is Jovian."

The man in the white suit finally introduced himself to Wanda.

As for why Wanda wasn’t wearing a red Spider-Man suit and swinging around through the sky like everyone else?

That was because Jovian had deliberately excluded her from the transformation.

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